Aquaman83 Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 I had two amazing dates with a person that I felt like there was mutual connection. But I was wrong. I was in middle of setting up our third date and I get blind sited with this text from her. Hey. I know we have tentative plans for Friday, but I have to be honest with you. I think we had amazing time and fantastic 2 dates, but I didn't feel the chemistry that I'm looking for. You are a great guy and I'm sure will make a special girl really happy one day. That being said, I wish you the best." I saw that and got heated and went outside for a quick walk. I responded "Whatever babe. It's all good. I still think you are amazing" She responded again with, "Thank you for making feel comfortable in this situation" I responded back with, "it's your loss" - I saw that and really wanted to say F*** YOU! I am not biting my tongue to make you feel comfortable. I am biting my tongue not to be an a$@!
ExpatInItaly Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 You handled it well up until you actually texted "It's your loss." Would've been better to have left it at your initial response. I understand you're hurt right now, totally normal. It sucks. But no need to text her a big eff you. She is allowed to change her mind about you and she did the right thing by letting you know instead of stringing you along. Now you won't have to waste any time of something that isn't going anywhere. 4
SoThatHappened Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 Yep, ExPat is right. You get a C+ for the first response, and an F- for the final response. When a girl did that to me after a couple weeks, I was a little b!Tch asking "Why? I thought there was a spark?" Best response would've been "No sweat. I understand there was no spark. Good luck in the future and thanks for hanging out when we did." That's it. That's all you can do. When a woman decides you're not for her, you are completely unarmed and there's nothing you can do besides bow out gracefully. Being defensive is the absolute worst thing you can do. This will help you in the future knowing not every woman will fall head-over-heels in love with you. You weren't meant to be. She recognized it (or something else happened, i.e. ex back in the picture). You never had a chance. Not your fault. 2
quattrob Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 This is one of the reasons why people string other people along when they are being pursued by someone they have little to no interest in. What she did was the right thing and you being mad about it all is fine too. But you should not be angry at her, she was being honest with you (which we do not see much now these days) and it's not easy to do what she did considering how she probably know how you'd feel. You're taking this the wrong way and way too seriously. Would you rather she strung you along knowing that she didn't feel it was right or that you guys had chemistry? Just to use you because she knows you are interested in her and turn you down later after she's done? The answer is pretty obvious. 1
hippychick3 Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 Telling her it was her loss was classless and unnecessary. I would have read that and thought to myself that I definitely dodged a bullet with this one. Not every date is going to work out...that's why it's called dating. You're getting to know each other. She has every right to her feelings. And kudos to her for being honest and upfront with you in a polite way. She could have easily tried the fade out or just ignored you. As hard as it is to take rejection (it sucks big time), it takes guts to politely let someone down. 1
mightycpa Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 Telling her it was her loss was classless and unnecessary. I would have read that and thought to myself that I definitely dodged a bullet with this one. Not every date is going to work out...that's why it's called dating. You're getting to know each other. She has every right to her feelings. And kudos to her for being honest and upfront with you in a polite way. She could have easily tried the fade out or just ignored you. As hard as it is to take rejection (it sucks big time), it takes guts to politely let someone down.I agree with this 100%, and all the rest of them too. Your instincts are probably right about this girl; it's not often that someone gives you the straight up truth at the time you need to hear it. As for her, I don't think she was blowing smoke up your ass when she told you that you were a great guy... there was no need to do that, no need to boost your ego. I think she was saying that regardless of how great you are, she wasn't feeling it, and that's it. That is no reflection on you whatsoever. And then you went and proved her wrong. Live and learn from this one.
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