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I'm Dreading Trying Online Dating

CosmicGate7

By CosmicGate7
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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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Well, then I wonder if he's really a "friend." A friend would want to help you out. But surely he's not blind and can see that you rarely (if ever) date and have no girlfriend. How do you explain that? Does he call you a bitch?

 

he's an awesome friend - the fact that he brings out all these girls from the salon is awesome - he's introduced me to more women than anybody. It's not his fault none of them liked me beyond friendship. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink it.

 

 

What cracks me up is that he's introduced me to maybe 15 women and 1 gay dude who works at his salon. The 1 gay dude wanted my cock so bad, it was just absurd :laugh: And no I don't look or act even 1% effeminate where anybody would think I'm gay.

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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Talk to me...what did you do when you crashed and burned in prior OLD??? I'm guessing you are late 20s/early 30s. When you did this in your early 20s it's really was hard in that date age group because women don't want young men and thise at your age could find men the usual ways through social networking.

 

this is actually a good point

 

I was 20 when I did it. When I try to do it in a couple months, I will be almost 27. When I was 20, I was a poor college student. Now I'm a very successful and established adult. I'm guessing this will be in my favor

 

Still I have very little faith it will work out. The competition online is just unbelievably difficult.

Edited by CosmicGate7
clia Established Member

clia

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he's an awesome friend - the fact that he brings out all these girls from the salon is awesome - he's introduced me to more women than anybody. It's not his fault none of them liked me beyond friendship. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink it.

 

Right, so he knows he's introduced you to all of these women and none of them wanted to date you. Perhaps he has some insight or could get some insight as to why? What does he say when you talk about the fact that he introduces you to all these women and none of them pan out for you? Does he think it's strange? What insight does he have for you, as your friend?

 

What cracks me up is that he's introduced me to maybe 15 women and 1 gay dude who works at his salon. The 1 gay dude wanted my cock so bad, it was just absurd :laugh: And no I don't look or act even 1% effeminate where anybody would think I'm gay.

 

Honestly, if you are getting hit on by gay guys as much as you say you are (per your other thread and previous threads as well), you are very likely giving off a gay vibe. Most gay guys aren't into hitting on straight dudes. That may also be why women aren't acting interested in you. They may think you are gay. (I know you will now tell me I'm wrong and crazy.)

 

This is what you need to find out from someone who knows you in person.

abby_tx Established Member

abby_tx

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avoid professional headshots. that's weird. i've also noticed mostly foreign guys do this. if your friends are better looking than you who cares? the girl for you will see you and not your white friends.

abby_tx Established Member

abby_tx

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Another tip, stop talking about how successful and established you are. That's also weird. You can say what you do for a job and the girl will know based on that you're successful and established. You don't have to spell it out for her. Modesty is a great trait.

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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Right, so he knows he's introduced you to all of these women and none of them wanted to date you. Perhaps he has some insight or could get some insight as to why? What does he say when you talk about the fact that he introduces you to all these women and none of them pan out for you? Does he think it's strange? What insight does he have for you, as your friend?

 

 

We don't really talk about it

 

I'm not interested in complaining about **** like this when I'm with my friends. I'm all about making them feel happy and comfortable around me to make sure they have a great time. I have absolutely no interest in turning one of our conversations into a pity party for me. I don't want my friends worrying about me.

 

I will say this, his sister has commented on it and she's absolutely and utterly baffled that I am perma-single. She has said on several occasions and i'm quoting directly here "you're perfect. I don't understand why you don't have a girlfriend"?

 

 

 

Honestly, if you are getting hit on by gay guys as much as you say you are (per your other thread and previous threads as well), you are very likely giving off a gay vibe. Most gay guys aren't into hitting on straight dudes. That may also be why women aren't acting interested in you. They may think you are gay. (I know you will now tell me I'm wrong and crazy.)

 

This is what you need to find out from someone who knows you in person.

 

 

I'm 5'10 199

Masculine face

Masculine voice

Facial hair

Masculine hobbies

Masculine mannerisms/posture/body language

 

Why would anybody think I'm gay? And yes I'm aware that there are gay dudes who are masculine but those are the ones that nobody thinks are gay.

 

I just attribute it to men being very logical beings who understand a good package regardless if they're straight or gay. Women are much more emotional based and what turns them on often times make absolutely no sense

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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avoid professional headshots. that's weird. i've also noticed mostly foreign guys do this. if your friends are better looking than you who cares? the girl for you will see you and not your white friends.

 

 

I've had several people tell me that putting pictures of your friends online is an absolutely terrible idea. That you want them to focus on you and not your friend who looks like GI Joe or Barbie. In my case, it's especially bad as my 3 closest friends are all very good looking white dudes.

 

 

what's the truth on this?

 

 

edit: nobody thinks I'm foreign BTW. I speak perfect English and am extremely Americanized. People just think I'm a Spanish dude born here.

Edited by CosmicGate7
SwordofFlame Established Member

SwordofFlame

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If your friends are so awesome and good looking, why doesn't one of them be your wingman? Or is that too awkward too?

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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If your friends are so awesome and good looking, why doesn't one of them be your wingman? Or is that too awkward too?

 

 

they've tried, I've had their girlfriends try, i've had their sisters try. I once had a guy who tried to help me who had slept with 100 women in his lifetime. The end result is nothingness.

 

 

...the more we talk about this, the more I'm starting to think I'm destined to be alone forever :confused:

Guyouthere Established Member

Guyouthere

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We don't really talk about it

 

I'm not interested in complaining about **** like this when I'm with my friends. I'm all about making them feel happy and comfortable around me to make sure they have a great time. I have absolutely no interest in turning one of our conversations into a pity party for me. I don't want my friends worrying about me.

 

I will say this, his sister has commented on it and she's absolutely and utterly baffled that I am perma-single. She has said on several occasions and i'm quoting directly here "you're perfect. I don't understand why you don't have a girlfriend"?

 

Women don't want good guys.

 

Just read the horror stories on here, the complaining about the "the guy did this to me, I can't be loved, no guy does me right, etc."

 

Women love the **** out there. Thats what they hook up with. Haven't you see enough of it by now?

 

;p

 

 

 

 

I'm 5'10 199

Masculine face

Masculine voice

Facial hair

Masculine hobbies

Masculine mannerisms/posture/body language

 

Why would anybody think I'm gay? And yes I'm aware that there are gay dudes who are masculine but those are the ones that nobody thinks are gay.

 

I just attribute it to men being very logical beings who understand a good package regardless if they're straight or gay. Women are much more emotional based and what turns them on often times make absolutely no sense

 

You have "missed the boat".

 

You see, being the "perfect guy" is what is running them off.

 

Don't you know by now that women don't want that?

 

Even on here, you see it all…. the women say,,,, "why can't I find the right guy, why aren't there any out there, why do they cheat, use me, break my heart, and all of the rest of the whining".

 

FACT is, that is what they got hooked up with. THEY chose it. They chose to be with those guys.

 

And you know what? I would bet anything that they passed up the genuine one along the way.

 

Its a psychological thing for them.

 

They run from the good, and have every reason to in their head to do so.

 

Now the secret is out.

Ami1uwant Established Member

Ami1uwant

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Trying to help you here....

 

What happens when your friends (make or female) try to set you up or introduce you?

 

Stop focusing on looks or package. What matters is who you are inside and how you sell those qualities.

women who aren't seriously looking are just going to follow looks...those looking for a relationship are looking deeper.

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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Trying to help you here....

 

What happens when your friends (make or female) try to set you up or introduce you?

 

 

Nothing

 

We have fun and have a good time. They don't want anything to do with me beyond just friendship.

 

 

Stop focusing on looks or package. What matters is who you are inside and how you sell those qualities.

women who aren't seriously looking are just going to follow looks...those looking for a relationship are looking deeper.

 

 

My character is every bit as strong as anything superficial. I've always had a strong moral code and do my best to do right to those in my circle. I love hearing when my friends say "that I'm the nicest guy in the world". Honestly that means everything to me, way more than any compliments about anything superficial.

 

 

If I found a girl who was actually attracted to me who got to know who I am and what I'm about, I'm certain she would fall in love with me.

SwordofFlame Established Member

SwordofFlame

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OP this might sound ridiculous but have you considered hiring a dating coach to see if he or she can figure out what the hell you're doing wrong? You can certainly afford one.... I mean you obviously don't have a clue as to what you're doing wrong and none of your friends can tell you either.

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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OP this might sound ridiculous but have you considered hiring a dating coach to see if he or she can figure out what the hell you're doing wrong? You can certainly afford one.... I mean you obviously don't have a clue as to what you're doing wrong and none of your friends can tell you either.

 

 

yes I have, on a few occasions actually

 

 

I don't know. I don't know what the cost of it would be, what the benefit would be, how qualified that person would be

SwordofFlame Established Member

SwordofFlame

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yes I have, on a few occasions actually

 

 

I don't know. I don't know what the cost of it would be, what the benefit would be, how qualified that person would be

Do some research. What have you got to lose at this point?

Ami1uwant Established Member

Ami1uwant

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yes I have, on a few occasions actually

 

 

I don't know. I don't know what the cost of it would be, what the benefit would be, how qualified that person would be

 

 

I'm looking for details behind this...

 

What did you ask these women when you met? How long was the conversation? What did you talk about?

 

Have you asked your buddies to watch if you are doing something wrong? Do you have a male friend wTching what you are doing? Have you watched one of your more successful buddies with meeting women snd see what he has done?

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abby_tx Established Member

abby_tx

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Post your pic and I'll give you an honest response!

lil_missy Established Member

lil_missy

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How do you know that all these women " want nothing to do with you"? As you keep saying. I mean where are you basing this judgement from? Eg have you asked them to a movie and they said no?

 

I'm not saying you're perfect, but even douche bags can get girlfriends, so your situation is just bizarre.

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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Do some research. What have you got to lose at this point?

 

That's the thing, I've done research and still don't know what to make of it.

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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I'm looking for details behind this...

 

What did you ask these women when you met? How long was the conversation? What did you talk about?

 

Have you asked your buddies to watch if you are doing something wrong? Do you have a male friend wTching what you are doing? Have you watched one of your more successful buddies with meeting women snd see what he has done?

 

 

I've gone out with my roommate a few times and seen how easily he gets girls. He's very similar to me in terms of personality and hobbies and what not. He's 5'5 though while I'm 5'10...still the women are naturally drawn to him and they want nothing to do with me.

Guyouthere Established Member

Guyouthere

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Act like an SOB. they will fly to you. lol ;)

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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How do you know that all these women " want nothing to do with you"? As you keep saying. I mean where are you basing this judgement from? Eg have you asked them to a movie and they said no?

 

I'm not saying you're perfect, but even douche bags can get girlfriends, so your situation is just bizarre.

 

When it comes to meeting girls through my friend, I absolutely cannot ask them out without getting fairly obvious signs. Getting rejected and automatically being labeled a creeper can be terribly awkward when I'm the bosses best friend. It can put him in a very awkward position and I won't do that no matter what the potential benefit is to me. In my case, I get no signs at all.

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CosmicGate7 Established Member

CosmicGate7

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Act like an SOB. they will fly to you. lol ;)

 

 

Completely incapable of doing that

 

Don't get me wrong, I'll bite somebody's head off if I feel disrespected but the people who are good to me, I show them nothing but love.

abby_tx Established Member

abby_tx

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do you pluck your eyebrows? the shape is near perfect. maybe that's why guys think you're gay? no offense. it's just guys usually have more wild brows.

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