heartbroken15 Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 I'm going to try to make this as short as possible. My ex and I was together for 8 yrs. She jumped into a rebound about a month after we broke up and I know its a rebound because she is always trying to be around me and she texts me saying she still miss and loves me but I have tried to do no contact because she never once said she wanted to get back with me. We both had agreed not to be together before the breakup so i guess we're both dumpee and dumper. lol. There are times when I want her back because we have kids together and we have a history and we both still love each other and there are times when I don't want her back because I'm thinking if she really love and miss me like she said then why is she still in this rebound relationship? It seems like every time we break up or have problems she run to another relationship trying to fill the void but it never works obviously because she end up unhappy and missing me. At first it seemed like she was happy to have someone new but as time passes it seems as if she miss me and wish we was still together. She even told me she hate that we are not together and things are the way that they are but never once tried to work it out and she even ask me was i happy out of the blue one day . So why is she not trying to be with me? Is she waiting on me to initiate? I try to just give her her space because she obviously doesn't know what she want. Someone help me. What should I do?
PegNosePete Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 You need to cut the cord. She is using you as a safety net. Trying out other guys, when it doesn't work, back to good old faithful. Don't be that guy... it doesn't end well for you... You should tell her that you will not be her backup plan any more, and that it's over for good. Then do LC; only communicate when it's strictly necessary for the separation process and about the kids arrangements.
Truth34 Posted October 27, 2015 Posted October 27, 2015 In all of these threads where people are asking if they should do something to try and change the outcome or leave them alone, the answer is usually to leave them alone. Do your own thing. If she wants to work on it at a later point, then that is up to her. But none of us can change a person, and even if you could, would you want that? I'd like to know that someone is with me because they want to be, not for any other reason. Time for you to go LC like was stated above, and quit letting her try and suck you in all the time.
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