RoxStar Posted May 23, 2005 Posted May 23, 2005 An alternative to breaking NC is to write things down either in form of a letter that you WILL NOT send or in a journal. I am having a rough day and really want to break no contact to just bitch him out some more but I know that wont matter to him and all it will do for me is make me look bad. So I just started a list of all the stuff I feel like I want an answer to or feel like I want to say to him and as the day has progressed I have compiled a lenghty list. This is for MY EYES ONLY though and I do not have any intention of calling him and going through this list. I cant say that I feel 100% better today but I dont feel as bad as I did this morning. I also know that if I did break NC I would likely feel worse then I did this morning so the list has helped somewhat. I just thought I would share that thought with anyone else struggling to keep NC going.
Fallen_Angel Posted May 23, 2005 Posted May 23, 2005 I absolutely agree! I've kept a journal since grade school and it's so funny to look back and read over all the silly things I used to do and all the guys I used to like... It's a great learning tool. There has to be some kind of release to all of the angry and bitter feelings, and sharing these feelings with your ex won't help. At least by writing them down you get them all out. Lately I've wanted nothing more than to hear my ex's voice, but when we last spoke 2 weeks ago he said he would be "very busy" for the next few weeks and I'll be damned if I call him again (aside from when I called him last week for a SIMPLE favor!). So I think I'll have to lash out in writing.
beesknees Posted May 23, 2005 Posted May 23, 2005 i'm having a weak day today too. i wanted to email him and B$#% him out good and hard, but i knew i wouldn't feel good afterward, whether i heard from him or not. i ranted all over my personal blog (but made sure i had it in "private" mode). i do feel better even though i still feel crappy. i hate that i'm the one still dwelling over stuff while he's just out doing god knows what though. i need to go get myself a yummy ice blended mocha to cheer myself up now. those always make me feel better.
teardrop Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 I kept journals since I was 13 (I'm now 39). One day when my boyfriend and I had a huge argument, I ripped up every single journal I ever wrote - including the ones I wrote when I was pregnant and gave birth. Do I regret that? Absolutely ... why did I do that? No clue - perhaps I wanted him to know that he was/is the one I have only ever loved. Not a good move on my part ... but lesson learned! Don't make the mistakes I did ... writing your thoughts and feelings down on paper to read at some other time in your life is definately a learning tool. At least I still have the baby journal book I wrote in ... my boys are my world!
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