Bobbi7 Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 Like early on, when going out on the first few dates, a guy will eventually want to pick the girl up to go out or come inside to see where she lives. Now, if the guy sees that she lives in a apartment would that be a dealbreaker? If she doesn't live in a luxury apt with stainless steel or granite countertops, fance pool, etc, etc. Or is not owning a nice house a dealbreaker?
Guyouthere Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 Like early on, when going out on the first few dates, a guy will eventually want to pick the girl up to go out or come inside to see where she lives. Now, if the guy sees that she lives in a apartment would that be a dealbreaker? If she doesn't live in a luxury apt with stainless steel or granite countertops, fance pool, etc, etc. Or is not owning a nice house a dealbreaker? Silly question, no brainer really. The answer, no. Why should it, unless the guy was materialistic himself? 3
Wewon Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 Like early on, when going out on the first few dates, a guy will eventually want to pick the girl up to go out or come inside to see where she lives. Now, if the guy sees that she lives in a apartment would that be a dealbreaker? If she doesn't live in a luxury apt with stainless steel or granite countertops, fance pool, etc, etc. Or is not owning a nice house a dealbreaker? No (in general). This is a major difference between men and woman. Its also one of the reasons you hear guys say that what a woman does for a living isn't that big of a deal. Generally speaking women look for a provider, men look for a woman that is a good steward of what she has (job, money, home).
Ruby Slippers Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 I worried about this a lot when I started dating men who made more money and lived in places much newer and fancier than mine. In spite of my worries, I never experienced any judgmental comments or behavior about my humble digs. Most men seemed impressed that I can make even a simple place cozy and inviting, keep it clean and running smoothly. Smart men appreciate frugality. For good men who are desirable for relationships, I don't think the amenities of your living space are a factor in attraction whatsoever. 3
Jejangles Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 In my experience, living space can be an issue, but usually only if I have a "better" situation (in their eyes) than the guy. I think there is still some dynamic between men and women where the man prefers to be equal to or better off than the woman. That's my experience anyway, but then I have dated quite a few guys who ultimately revealed they were not comfortable with me having a good job and owning my own home because they were not happy with their own job and did not have an ideal living situation. I don't think most men will worry about it otherwise, unless you are a hoarder or something! 1
Woggle Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 As long as she keeps it clean and there are no roaches or bed bugs I don't care.
Guyouthere Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 As long as she keeps it clean and there are no roaches or bed bugs I don't care. unless you are an exterminator…. then you can purge her place and offer to check it on a regular basis
Erik30 Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 No, I don't care about that at all. And if she has a "better situation" at home than me, I guess we'll be spending more time at her place
BLND Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 Depends on the guy. A lot of men nowadays are much more materialistic than women. There are guys who would never date a girl if she didn't have a nice car and lived in a nice neighborhood. There are also guys, who need to be with a girl whose family is known in the city. Some guys only date women richer than them because they are looking for a come up. But ya generally speaking a lot of guys care about whether you live in a nice area or not.
J21 Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 It wouldn't matter if she lived in a apartment, but it would matter if she lived in something that looked like a crack house or the slums. I would also want to know if it was clean or messy inside her apt.
Siquijor Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 I don't. I'd be more interested in the girl than a lump of concrete. 1
louxor Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 When I first started dating my ex, she had just moved out of home so was tight on funds. For the first couple of months that I stayed at her place, we were sleeping on a single mattress on the floor - It didn't matter one bit, I was there to be with her. To be honest it's probably a good thing if your place isn't too flashy, because then you know the person likes you for who you are if they stick around, not what you have. And on the flip side, my place at the time was really nice, and whenever she came over she'd always say stuff like "Your place is so nice, I live in a s***hole compared to this" etc etc. This was actually such a turn off for me, because she was coming off like she wasn't worthy of me just because I was at a more established financial position than she was. But yeh, don't worry about it - If the person genuinely likes you they won't care what your place is like (Just make sure it's tidy )
Guyouthere Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 If I have a woman come over I make sure I don't sure her the backyard. I know she would question the tombstones, 55 gallon drums, and meat grinder mounted on the work bench. har har har
Popsicle Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 This is a great question. I have a decent place right now because I have kids, but when I was young and in college with no money, I lived in dumps and guys totally could care less. I realize this now looking back. What's even more remarkable is that I didn't care either about them seeing my place or how I lived. I was just as careless and fancy-free as ever, and no one cared. They may have even liked it more. On the contrary, one of my friend's owns a super nice house and she claims that it's not been a good thing to have during dating because it attracts loser guys who end up wanting to mooch off of her. 2
phineas Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 most women my age have good jobs plus child support to afford a decent place. some don't. But most women have decent/newer cars. so it's a trade off. I have an ok house but drive a POS. I can only afford so much since I am paying child support. so i really don't care as long as it isn't a hole.
mystikmind2005 Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 No it doesn't matter at all ..... but there is one exception.... If it is a symptom of financial irresponsibility! Plenty of guys (and women) will know what i mean when i say that we have tangled with financially irresponsible partner in the past and never want to go there again! 2
SwordofFlame Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 I'd be way more concerned about the neighborhood than the actual living unit.
lino Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 This doesn't matter to most men. A lot of women can get away with living with their parents till a much later age as well. Only thing about a woman's living quarters that would turn me off would be if she was still living with an ex partner. Other than that I couldn't care. I wish guys had the same freedom.
phineas Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 This doesn't matter to most men. A lot of women can get away with living with their parents till a much later age as well. Only thing about a woman's living quarters that would turn me off would be if she was still living with an ex partner. Other than that I couldn't care. I wish guys had the same freedom. At my age, I actually see a good amount of divorced women living in the marital home with the ex until it sells. I won't date them, but being divorced myself I fully understand the need for him to stay there. Also, women with roomates. unless it is some palatial condo I won't do it. where I live there are plenty of places a single woman can afford on her own that are decent. I understand in other cities it's way more expensive.
kilgore Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 I worried about this a lot when I started dating men who made more money and lived in places much newer and fancier than mine. In spite of my worries, I never experienced any judgmental comments or behavior about my humble digs. Most men seemed impressed that I can make even a simple place cozy and inviting, keep it clean and running smoothly. Smart men appreciate frugality. For good men who are desirable for relationships, I don't think the amenities of your living space are a factor in attraction whatsoever. Agree. I never cared at all
SugarLips72 Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 As long as you have your own place and dont live with your parents, who cares? I'm a single Mom and own my own house. It is ok, in a nice neighborhood. My sister lives with me but is hardly ever home since she works 2 jobs so I do wonder if guys care about that. As a woman I would be turned off if a guy around my age lived with a parent, or house was a filthy disgusting mess. Apart from that how nice of an apt they have doesn't matter unless its income restricted. 1
CosmicGate7 Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 Lol no i have a beautiful 2000 sqrt foot house with brand new everything inside and I would be fine dating a girl that still lived at home with parents
Els Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 (edited) You have got to be kidding me - I don't know any guy who cares. Unless 1) she's living with a guy who has the hots for her, or 2) she lives with her parents despite being in her 30s. To counter what some of the guys here are saying - some guys I know would be put off from dating a woman who was in her late 20s or older and living permanently with her parents with no plans to move out. I can understand why and I think it's a reasonable dealbreaker. Edited October 26, 2015 by Elswyth
central Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 The only times I'd have an issue with a woman's living arrangement are these: living with parents; living with husband or bf; living in a celibate community such as a nunnery; not really living anywhere, as in homeless. 1
Popsicle Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 What about if the woman had same-sex roommates (especially if she's older)? Do guys care about that?
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