SammySammy Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 1) Mad nunchuck skillz 2) Loves anchovies 3) Can imitate Michael Jackson 4) Still gets morning wood 5) Watches chick flicks with me Best answer yet. 1
Nikki Sahagin Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 (edited) Hi OP, I can't really rank in terms of priority but here are traits I look for in a relationship to make it last: * Faithfulness - I want a man who can be faithful to me * Loyalty - Loyalty to me is the HOTTEST trait * Honesty - I don't want to live life being lied to * Kindness - I want someone who is happy to treat me with kindness, consider my feelings * Patience - If I get upset or frustrated, a patient man who is supportive means the world * Generosity - A man who can share with me his time, thoughts, passions, heart, opinions * Attention to detail - A man who can notice little things about me; the face I pull if I'm feeling insecure or the fact that when I just said 'I'm fine' what I really meant was 'please sit with me and give me a cuddle'. He would remember my birthday, our anniversary, my favourite colour, or notice that I do my hair * Romance - He would still call me beautiful, leave me a little poem in a DVD case and take me out to dinner years later * Passion - The sexual and romantic passion would still be worked on between us I am happy to give all this and more back to the man I'm with. I've been told I have unrealistic expectations but I genuinely feel this type of relationship exists and is out there and is really the only kind of relationship worth having. Edited October 25, 2015 by Nikki Sahagin 4
deadelvis Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 1) Mad nunchuck skillz 2) Loves anchovies 3) Can imitate Michael Jackson 4) Still gets morning wood 5) Watches chick flicks with me http://www.bringbackfit.com/2014site/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/41101320.jpg
Miss Peach Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 I'm not 40+ but my list is largely around character traits that are important to me like honesty, fidelity, intentional, etc. I need attraction too but I am open to the package that comes in. In addition to character traits, I looks for someone with adequate time for a relationship, no addictions (i.e., drugs), fiscally responsible, and no desire for future biological kids.
pteromom Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 1. kindness (to me and to others) 2. respect (of me and of others) 3. honest (open, faithful, communicative) 4. humor (laughs easily and often; makes me laugh) 5. happiness (positive, optimistic, assumes the best, likes his life)
pteromom Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 If I met a 40 year old who had been divorced twice and handed me a list like this, I think my hearing would be permanently damaged with the alarm bells going off. Me too. Wardrobe? I mean, a nice suit is sexy, but not an important indicator of a man's character and compatibility.
pteromom Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 The universal trait that just about all woman are attracted to is a guy who commands the room...The leader, the guy with the most confidence..The guy that other guys look up to....The guy that knows he's a cut above and doesn't really give a shyt what others think.. Nope, I have never been attracted to that guy. I have always been attracted to sweet shy guys who are funny when you get to know them. That does NOT mean I am attracted to guys without confidence or with crippling insecurity. That's definitely not attractive. 1
pteromom Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 The "attention to detail" point may be asking a bit much, but the rest are absolutely attainable. I would give credit for ATTEMPTING attention to detail. Hi OP, I can't really rank in terms of priority but here are traits I look for in a relationship to make it last: * Faithfulness - I want a man who can be faithful to me * Loyalty - Loyalty to me is the HOTTEST trait * Honesty - I don't want to live life being lied to * Kindness - I want someone who is happy to treat me with kindness, consider my feelings * Patience - If I get upset or frustrated, a patient man who is supportive means the world * Generosity - A man who can share with me his time, thoughts, passions, heart, opinions * Attention to detail - A man who can notice little things about me; the face I pull if I'm feeling insecure or the fact that when I just said 'I'm fine' what I really meant was 'please sit with me and give me a cuddle'. He would remember my birthday, our anniversary, my favourite colour, or notice that I do my hair * Romance - He would still call me beautiful, leave me a little poem in a DVD case and take me out to dinner years later * Passion - The sexual and romantic passion would still be worked on between us I am happy to give all this and more back to the man I'm with. I've been told I have unrealistic expectations but I genuinely feel this type of relationship exists and is out there and is really the only kind of relationship worth having.
carhill Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 Me too. Wardrobe? I mean, a nice suit is sexy, but not an important indicator of a man's character and compatibility. Since all women are different, and the one I married had been previously married to a partner in a CPA firm (met him so know), she had her standards for a lot of things and, yup, so did most of the women I dated. Why? Because they could. All that compatibility/romance/passion/attractiveness stuff was taken for granted. Socio-economics and lifestyle was important, hence the focus on income, family, lack of criminal involvement and, yup, lifestyle indicators like a wardrobe. I caught some slack since I ran a blue collar business and wore jeans and coveralls a lot. Still, that's how it went. The other men under consideration met or aspired to their standards or they were dismissed. I got dismissed a lot, hence getting dates was hard. Hope that explains things. 1
deadelvis Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 1. Money 2. Hot 3. Big **** 4. Muscles 5. Did I mention money?
RedRobin Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 Most women will say they favor the sweet and sensitive guy....That hasn't been my experience..The universal trait that just about all woman are attracted to is a guy who commands the room...The leader, the guy with the most confidence..The guy that other guys look up to....The guy that knows he's a cut above and doesn't really give a shyt what others think.. Now that's not to say that there isn't room at the trough for the others,...there are only so many to go around...so everyone finds their way eventually....Hopefully, anyway... TFY That's funny. I'd go talk to that guy, because we'd probably make good business partners (if I could trust him). But I would never be in a relationship with that guy. He'd probably mistake my business interest with romantic interest though, lol. Yea. So would the other guys around him maybe. So I can see how some guys might be mistaken that all women want that. The attitude mentioned above usually extends to their romantic relationship... The not giving a shyte what others think part and being poor negotiators. I see how they are around their wives at business dinners. I can deal with that in a business sense, but wouldn't in a romantic sense. Not my thing. I wouldn't be their thing either, but I've seen plenty try. It's more like I'm a challenge for them and just one more obstacle to overcome. They aren't terribly good at relating to other people, is my observation.
Minnie09 Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 1) appreciates me, makes me a priority 2) good lover 3) stable career 4) has / understands my sense of humor 5) has his own circle of friends; stable social circle
Cococbel Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 1. Connection 2. Stable (no addictions, secure in himself, confident) 3. Fun (sense of humour) 4. Considerate 5. Present (interested in deep conversation)
Male Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 Connection. If I connect with him I won't care at all about the rest like job, education, money, status. I wish more women would adopt and believe in this mindset. Too many do the opposite though. They pull out their "checklist" and analyze his job, finances, height, social status, etc....without ever giving him a chance at a connection or learning who he is or what values he has.
smackie9 Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 I wish more women would adopt and believe in this mindset. Too many do the opposite though. They pull out their "checklist" and analyze his job, finances, height, social status, etc....without ever giving him a chance at a connection or learning who he is or what values he has. High or unrealistic expectations maybe BUT if you don't follow through with your expectations, the relationship will fall short. You can't live on connection, love, values alone. It's much more than that, that is needed for a relationship to sustain itself for the long haul. 3
Male Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 (edited) High or unrealistic expectations maybe BUT if you don't follow through with your expectations, the relationship will fall short. You can't live on connection, love, values alone. It's much more than that, that is needed for a relationship to sustain itself for the long haul. Disagree 100% Connection, love, and values is at the core of it all. Edited October 28, 2015 by Male
pteromom Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 I wish more women would adopt and believe in this mindset. Too many do the opposite though. They pull out their "checklist" and analyze his job, finances, height, social status, etc....without ever giving him a chance at a connection or learning who he is or what values he has. It depends on what the woman wants. If a woman is looking for a man to build a future and family with, she would be a fool not to consider his job and goals and finances. If a woman is a highly social person who wants a wide and diverse social circle, she would be a fool to not consider his social status. Height.... yeah. That isn't important as to his quality as a partner. BUT - everyone should be attracted to the person they are with, and like it or not, there are women who simply aren't attracted to short men (just like some men are attracted to specific body types even though other women could be good partners.) 1
pteromom Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 Disagree 100% Connection, love, and values is at the core of it all. Maybe at the core, but it isn't everything. If 2 people love each other and share values, but have completely different life goals, their relationship won't work. 1
Els Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 Disagree 100% Connection, love, and values is at the core of it all. Right. Which means you'll be totally okay with dating a 300 lbs homeless woman with 5 kids, yes? Connection, love, and values are incredibly important (and I tend to prioritize them myself), but most people who are honest with themselves realize that these do not make up 100% of a R. 2
RedRobin Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 1. Close to my own age. 2. Shares my values when it comes to intimacy and relationships. 3. Self sufficient with no barriers to full employment (ie no criminal history, etc). 4. Physically active and healthy with no substance abuse issues (past or present), no mental illness or STD's. 5. Strong ties to friends and family. 1
froz Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 1) Faithful. 2) In control of his emotions. 3) Kind to the elderly, children and animals. 4) Free of addictions. 5) Finacially stable. What do you mean by financially stable? Spends money well/not in major debt etc?
MoreAmore Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 (edited) Would appreciate the 40+ year old crowd answering if at all possible. What are the top 5 things (or a couple more if needed) that you really really really need/want/desire from a man 40+ in order to see a long term relationship? Rank in order of priority. I'm not 40+ but I date in that range. 1. Intellect 2. Common interests and beliefs 3. Sense of humor 4. Kindness 5. High sex drive and ability * Edited October 29, 2015 by MoreAmore
Got it Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 Not in the 40+ but not TOO far way. 1. Connection 2. Sense of humor 3. Similar values to work and personal. Walks the talk. 4. Similar earnings or a very progressive man that is completely okay with a woman making (substantially) more. 5. Tries every day to show the people in his life that he loves them. 6. Passionate
Recommended Posts