soy sauce on toast Posted October 24, 2015 Posted October 24, 2015 (edited) Without going into much detail, that "we're doomed" feeling became even more real, and I've had to let her go, I've told her I want out. I don't want to speak with her again and even discuss this decision of mine anymore (we had both seen this coming anyway), and I'm now going NC since this morning. This relationship has just been killing me, I haven't been happy in a long time. And although I'm feeling miserable NOW, breaking up with her is probably the best decision. But how do I cope NOW? What do I do? How long does this pain last for? She still wants me, we still love each other, I'm her first love and she doesn't want to lose me (and really, I don't want to lose her either), but I'm always in PAIN, and she makes little efforts in our long distance relationship. I've told her so many times I'm in pain, but she doesn't DO ANYTHING. She thinks just saying "I love you" everyday is enough, but I never felt like I was a part of her life... This relationship has all been one-way street, and I was responsible for it. It's worn me out... and now I've given up for good. I'm studying abroad in a foreign country too (just since last month), and I'm all alone, very far from family (my family actually doesn't even live in Europe). I've considered quitting from my degree, and just going home. How do I stay strong? What can I do? If I stay NC, will she change? Will she soon realise that she could actually get me back if she changed? Or will it just kill her, and she'll try and forget me? I've been dumped before in a long distance relationship, and my solution was to go NC, and I eventually became happy again. But I'm the dumper now... and I feel sick. I wanted her to change, but she never did. (I'm from the UK, she's from France, I study now in another European country, and my family's in New Zealand. Our relationship has always been long distance.) Edited October 24, 2015 by soy sauce on toast
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