Left and hurt?...

[DanAmz]

Hello I've never done anything like this before but I found it so helpful the advice that any of you members give and I feel that the more opinions and advice I get the sooner I can move on! This is my storey I had a crush on a girl I had it for a while all the time I saw her I was just excited happy and fancied her so much she was a well known girl who had a rough past with an ex so she was known in a good way but also a bad for example I had peopl saying don't go there she ****s boys about has a kid etc but I didn't mind that she had a kid he is an amazing little boy and some boys said go for it she is lush so the decision was down to me so I did go for it everyone deserves a chance right? So I went on a night out spoke to her it went really well we had pictures hugging it was an amazing night nothing happend between us that night so the next day came I looked for her in Facebook found her added her and mailed her I had no reply for a week then she replied to me I asked how come it took so long and she said she had been mental busy in work and looking after her little boy (son) so I said ok cool no worries so we spoke etc it was going well but then one of the boys came to me and said she had been speaking and seeing her ex whilst I hadn't heard off her for that week so I asked her about it she said she still cared for him etc and I accepted that they had been together for a year so I left her be but she mailed me a few days after asking if I wanted to meet for a drink so we spoke for about 2weeks then we met up had a drink had an amazing time and she had her own place I ended up there for the night and obv in the morning we did have sex which was amazing anyway time went on we was speaking going on dates it was amazing I was so happy had the girl of my dreams I met her son who was also amazing and we got together now then as we got in a relationships her ex wasn't happy about that and made our lives difficult and made her more confused so i worked away and couldn't help out much and be there for her so anyway I returned home frim work and whilst I had been away I found out off a friend she had gone back to his house after a night out so I asked her about it and she said it's not true so I believed her another week went by and everything was good no hassle nothing then we both went out together then one of her friends said you can't lie to the poor boy tell him the truth I asked what was she on about and she said she did go back to his house she never slept with him and to this day I don't know if she did sleep with him so I walked out left and went to my mothers she stayed with her friend crying later that night she was phoning texting but I was ignoring her I was fuming but she took it a step further and came to my mothers walked in crying her eyes out saying how much she wanted me and the words I love you came out of her mouth we had only been together around 2months at this point so I forgave her and I tell you what it was the best decision I ever made she changed and she was amazing everything I ever wanted so we got in a serious relationship I moved in with her and we lived happily don't get me wrong we did have up and down moments but everyone does most of the time we was amazing! We lasted 4years and got engaged and was planning our wedding!

 

Now for the next part of my storey we split around 3months ago August time basically we was arguing for a little while because I was leaving my job as I had enough of the place and we was worried about money etc because we had a new house together after leaving her one and living with my parents for a year and a half my mother and her became very close it was really nice living with my partners with her so we had a new place and began arguing it went on for around 4weeks this was when I noticed she was changing into a bitch really not being helpful at all so it went for the worse and I left and went back to my mothers house now this is where I ***ed up and messed things up I went out with my mates and we had a new memeber I never seen before it was a she of course so she spoke to me and was asking about my relationship being quiet pushy towards me but she was being really helpful about what I was telling her about the arguing etc so that was that I went back to my mothers house now this new girl managed to get my number and was messaging me being really nice and helpful I didn't think anything of it nothing me and my partner had been split for around 2days so I went back out seen her again but this is where i messed up and we was getting along and I went back to her house and slept with her and woke up and realised what a mistake I done my partner never knew about it and she was phoning texting crying over my mothers house and she started clicking that I want home a lot because I didn't know how to tell her I was to scared I done a massive mistake so she asked to see me and I did I went over seen her and I manned up like the man I was and told her the absolute truth and it killed her she told me to get out of our house and never come back i was so upset but I left her be give her time and sieve and see what happens so then I noticed she wasn't home a lot she only lived over the street I asked her about it and she told me she had been dating other men this was around the 3weeks mark she was a different women I hated her but I brang it on myself and accepted it and left her to it and I obv went back to that other girl and was happy now then my partner found out about this I only had seen her a couple of times it was nothing at all to it so me and my partner met up spoke and she was upset again crying saying she wants me back and I said are you sure can you forgive me etc and she said yes yes yes so I ask who she had seen etc and she wouldnt tell me who she just said she went out on 2 dates and I was ok with that because what I had done was worse so we was split for around 5weeks now at this point after all this hurt we caused to each other anyway our love was strong for each other we started seeing each other going on dates taking things slow enjoying and it was going good I had the girl of my dreams back I was happy until she was having texts off 5other boys and one of them had said how nice it was staying in the hotel with eachother I went nuts lost it asked her about it she told me the truth but wouldn't tell me who it was nothing so I left but went to my mothers house the next day she came over crying saying sorry and I said to myself this is my mess it's my fault if I didn't do what I done then she wouldn't have done that!

 

So we forgave eachother and got back talking being happy taking things slow she had a new number and no social networks so it was good but anyway her friends found out about us and her dad so and they wasn't happy about it at all because my partner had told them what I done but not what she had been up to so things went off rail again we had been seeing eachother for around a week so she was listening to her friends and dad but they never knew what she had done to me just what I did so we spoke about it and she told me she had said but she never so another week went on I didn't see her much but we spoke phoned etc and we said we wanted eachother lets go see her dad so she went on her own at first he was to busy to talk about it surprise so we left it for a few days now then it was a weekend and we was on a good level with eachother we wanted eachother back together despite everything that had gone on so on a Friday I had the most amazing text off her saying how much she loved me wanted to marry me I was so happy with it I cried all ***ing night so the sat came and she said she was off out with friends and her friends are *******s all of them are they still thought I was the bad one which I was because what I done to my partner but look what she done to me and she knew they didn't know the whole truth about what she had been up to anyway she went out and guess what met some guy and put pics up of her kissing him and going home with him and waking up with him I was so ***ing hurt man couldn't believe it Friday she wanted to marry me and we had been seeing eachother sleeping with eachother it was nuts so I messaged her I had nothing from her at all until the night she wouldn't speak to me over the phone just texts she was a completely different person horrible infact putting pics up n sanpchat of them 2 it was sick! So I asked her she was saying I'm so sorry it felt right I told her go be with him and *** off I was dying inside so the next day she was messaging me saying she wanted to be with me and she is sorry etc I said *** off again as I was really hurting she didn't even pull the pics down so this same day now I didn't message her after telling her to *** off and guess what I found out she went back to his house again he is a complete stranger to her she doesn't even know him at all nothing about him and she was there obv shagging him again so I messaged her when she was there and said you're a slag etc I was so hurt I said I'll be happy without you and she replied good I'm glad you're happy and I never heard anything from her for a few days after that! I thought how could you do this after 4years and we was pretty much back together too!! I'm going to stop there because the is another storey or part I need to explain which is long but not as long as this one sorry but guys what are you're views so far I miss her so much it kills me I don't want to be back with her at all and I don't want to play games and hurt her because I care for her I just want her to feel the pain I'm feeling now because it's too soon for her to just forget about me right? I don't know I need help ask advice on this and I'll move on to the next part of my story thnkas for taking time to read this guys means a lot!!!

Edited October 24, 2015 by DanAmz