welshman79 Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Hello everyone, I just wonder if some of you could perhaps give me some advice and guidance as I am struggling after breaking-up with my girlfriend (this happened this morning)... We met 6 months ago after I came back from a holiday in New York. We had met online while I had been relaxing in my hostel as the weather was miserable that afternoon and began to communicate. We met when I got home and she seemed lovely...kind, non-judgemental, easy to get on with etc. As a bit of background - she had gone through surgery for her ankle a year before after falling and ripping her ligaments off. She was suffering with Chronic Pain Syndrome? and after a few months of being together she began taking some medication to counter it. By this time, we had talked about being together and were thinking of making plans for the future. Both of us were very happy. However, after these few months her behaviour began to change. She had a very high-powered job as a managing director and had run her own business too. I saw that she began to be very patronising towards me on occasions, making sarcastic comments and at times (this happened about 4-5 times at least) was very verbally abusive to me (using bad language, telling me to go back to my ex's etc.)...She would be very upset and sorry when it happened, however these incidents happened again like I have said. She told me it was her medication and she wanted to come off them...however the doctor said he didn't think it was a good idea. I also felt she began a little possessive as I was doing a LOT of travelling back and forth to see her...sometimes driving near enough at midnight after doing a long day in work and college afterwards...if I was not there on time and late she would be very moody. I began to found this draining but tried to shrug it off. This past few weeks we had been thinking of moving in together and going forward in the relationship when I began to become convicted that I needed to end things. I guess I had tried to shrug off what had gone on, but deep down I realised that after a number of very difficult relationships (involving threats, mental health issues etc.) that I didn't want to perhaps put myself through breaking-up in the future once we had moved on to the next stage. When I told her I wanted to break-up she was obviously very upset. I found it extremely hard as I am not a person who ever wants to hurt anyone (today has been horrible in work trying to work with the kids when my mind has been elsewhere)...I feel absolutely exhausted. I have had texts from her wanting more answers and have said that I felt the behaviour was too much for me to handle...Since then I just looked up the medication she is on and there is not much on there which suggests this medication is known for causing mood swings. That in one way has made me feel a little better. At the moment, she is continuing to try and text even though I have told her my reasons. She is sending emotive messages about me being uncaring, heartless etc. so I am thinking is turning my phone off for the night the best thing for me to do? I feel utterly exhausted with what has happened...it has been a draining few months and while I know I have done the right thing, I really do feel awful for hurting her. Your advice would be very much appreciated.
Author welshman79 Posted October 23, 2015 Author Posted October 23, 2015 Any advice would be appreciated guys. Really struggling tonight.
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