alphamale Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by SexKitten trying to be an alpha male will not work. either you ARE or you ARE NOT, and very much of it depends on other people's views and attraction to you. this is true SEXKITTEN....but....there is a certain class of man who can develop into an alpha male as they get older and get more experience. these are the guys who were sorta nerdy or dorky in high school and you see them 20 yrs later and they are running their own multi million dollar company with a beautiful wife and intelligence and personality galore. It happens!! some of you described an alpha male as a kind of person who dominates and rules and orders people around. there are many men like this who are not alpha males. this is true, true alpha males use their personality and intelligence and knowledge of people to win them over and keep them.
Opium Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 this is true SEXKITTEN....but....there is a certain class of man who can develop into an alpha male as they get older and get more experience. these are the guys who were sorta nerdy or dorky in high school and you see them 20 yrs later and they are running their own multi million dollar company with a beautiful wife and intelligence and personality galore. It happens Where are they?? Please tell me... With no wife of course
alphamale Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by Opium Where are they?? Please tell me... With no wife of course usually you'll find them any where highly intelligent people can be found. the majority of them are fairly nerdy/dorky....but.....there are a minority of them that are alpha males waiting to be born. it all has to do with intelligence OPIUM
faux Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 There are no alpha males among humans. Sorry. Human society no longer works that way. If it is alpha males you are seeking, you would have better luck observing more primitive forms of wildlife. If I am forced to consider the proposal of alpha males in human society, I would say that yes, there are very intelligent and driven men in this world. That, however, is really not an alpha male.
SexKitten Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 it is possible to be wordly and have that personality without formal education, even if it is rare.
blind_otter Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by SexKitten it is possible to be wordly and have that personality without formal education, even if it is rare. Yes, like someone who has travelled and lived around the world in various cultures and situations....life experience is a great teacher, IMO. Sometimes the people with less education and more life experience are...shall we say, wiser, not necessarily more intelligent, than those who have a lot of "book learnin'"
alphamale Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by blind_otter Sometimes the people with less education and more life experience are...shall we say, wiser, not necessarily more intelligent, than those who have a lot of "book learnin'" Look....B_0, must we beat this dead horse for the thousanth time? We all know there are multiple forms of intelligence and all that krap and that someone with three Ph.D.s could be a total moron with no social skills and that someone with a 9th grade education could very smart and worldly. there are always exceptions. BUT in general.......the more educated you are the more intelligent and liberal you are and the more you can adapt and change and learn and grown.
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 24, 2005 Author Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme Which is quite different from becoming someone else entirely. Not trying to be completely different. You can not reprogram yourself completely. You will always have character traits and flaws. All I want to do is mininize my weaknesses and emphasize my strengths. And I can do that by thinking about and emulating an alpha male in a lot of respects. It doesn't mean that I will become one, it just means that in the process I will be improving, bettering myself. I doubt I'll ever really change from being "me" but I do have a lot of room for improvement.
SexKitten Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Look....B_0, must we beat this dead horse for the thousanth time? We all know there are multiple forms of intelligence and all that krap and that someone with three Ph.D.s could be a total moron with no social skills and that someone with a 9th grade education could very smart and worldly. there are always exceptions. BUT in general.......the more educated you are the more intelligent and liberal you are and the more you can adapt and change and learn and grown. i don't know that i would go so far as to say that education "makes you liberal." very often, education leans a little more toward conformity.
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 24, 2005 Author Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by Moose Then I'm wrong when I said: Accepting yourself for who you are doesn't limit you to growth. As a matter of fact, I believe it releases you TO grow. "When you love yourself, love yourself completely, you will have no rivals...." - Benjamin Franklin
Opium Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC Not trying to be completely different. You can not reprogram yourself completely. You will always have character traits and flaws. All I want to do is mininize my weaknesses and emphasize my strengths. And I can do that by thinking about and emulating an alpha male in a lot of respects. It doesn't mean that I will become one, it just means that in the process I will be improving, bettering myself. I doubt I'll ever really change from being "me" but I do have a lot of room for improvement. That's the first step in my opinion, realizing your not perfect and wanting to better yourself. It takes a lot to actually come out and say "hey I'm human, I have flaws". I give you a Hi-5 for that one.
westernxer Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC Not trying to be completely different. You can not reprogram yourself completely. You will always have character traits and flaws. All I want to do is mininize my weaknesses and emphasize my strengths. And I can do that by thinking about and emulating an alpha male in a lot of respects. It doesn't mean that I will become one, it just means that in the process I will be improving, bettering myself. I doubt I'll ever really change from being "me" but I do have a lot of room for improvement. Improvement... that's how I look at it.
blind_otter Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Look....B_0, must we beat this dead horse for the thousanth time? We all know there are multiple forms of intelligence and all that krap and that someone with three Ph.D.s could be a total moron with no social skills and that someone with a 9th grade education could very smart and worldly. there are always exceptions. BUT in general.......the more educated you are the more intelligent and liberal you are and the more you can adapt and change and learn and grown. Jeez, I was just tryin' to make conversation, pops. Sorrrrrryyyyyy. I just happened to grow up with a father who was the exception to the rule. And also my bf is like that, lived in australia and thailand and greece, no college. Spent those years travelling...actually my BF is disturbingly like my Dad. I am a freak
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 24, 2005 Author Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by RoxStar I do think that an ALPHAMALE is a personality trait to a degree but then there are people in society that also try to become an ALPHAMALE and there is a difference in those two people. CIOC may not be unhappy if he develops ALPHAMALE traits. Maybe he has those traits already but doesnt realize it, maybe he has been in situations where those traits werent able to be expressed??? He might find happiness if he really explores himself to find out what he is really made of and who he is deep down. Finding out who you are as a person is the essence of confidence and self acceptance. When you dont know who you are or you feel like you are supposed to be something or someone else and you lose your self worth and you have more problems with self esteem. You can become afraid of letting people inside to know the real you because you are afraid they wont like the real you. When you come to accept yourself and not fear what people will think you take on more confidence and can start to transition into a more ALPHAMALE type of person. This is the most accurate description of what I am going through right now. I'm just finding myself. I guess being comfortable with yourself is something I have to spend a lot of time on.
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 24, 2005 Author Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme One woman decided they weren't a good pair. This is hardly evidence that 'women' don't like him as he is. I'm 36 and that was the only girl I've ever been truly in love with. How often can one fall head over heels in love?
alphamale Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by SexKitten i don't know that i would go so far as to say that education "makes you liberal." very often, education leans a little more toward conformity. well i disagree SEXKITTEN. education usually makes one more accepting of others who are different, it make one more adaptable, it make one more willing to compromise, it makes one think more for themselves instead of listening to dogma. etc etc etc.... it makes you want to grow and learn and understand diffent philosophies. it is actually very well documented. why are nations that have higher levels of education more tolerant and accepting??
westernxer Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC How often can one fall head over heels in love? That would be a great topic for another thread.
blind_otter Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC I'm 36 and that was the only girl I've ever been truly in love with. How often can one fall head over heels in love? It can happen again, believe me. You feel like it can't now, because it's still fresh and you keep picking at your scab. Stop playing with it! Every time you contact her it's sh*tty again. Don't allow yourself to indulge in the fantasy of memory or what could have been.
westernxer Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by SexKitten i don't know that i would go so far as to say that education "makes you liberal." very often, education leans a little more toward conformity. That would certainly be the case at the university I attended...
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 24, 2005 Author Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer Improvement... that's how I look at it. That's all my goal is. I may NEVER become an alpha male, but if I can become comfortable in my own skin and learn to interact more successfully with women, then I am OK with that too. I am not expecting a miracle or a complete change. Just improvements. Calm Confident Self-Assured Masculine It's on my PC and I have been engraining it in my head. Now all I need to do is figure out how to love and accept myself. That's where a lot of confidence and self assuredness will come from.
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 24, 2005 Author Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by Opium That's the first step in my opinion, realizing your not perfect and wanting to better yourself. It takes a lot to actually come out and say "hey I'm human, I have flaws". I give you a Hi-5 for that one. I understand. I know I am flawed and not perfect. I know I have a long way to go to get to where I want to be (which is a better person and more comfy in my own skin).
SexKitten Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale well i disagree SEXKITTEN. education usually makes one more accepting of others who are different, it make one more adaptable, it make one more willing to compromise, it makes one think more for themselves instead of listening to dogma. etc etc etc.... it makes you want to grow and learn and understand diffent philosophies. it is actually very well documented. why are nations that have higher levels of education more tolerant and accepting?? i don't think that they are more tolerant. being at a presitgious institution rarely teaches the art of being more tolerant. Originally posted by westernxer That would certainly be the case at the university I attended... case in point. thanks, western. all this talk of growing and learning, it's like a barney television special. people grow and learn in all different ways, we know that. dead horse. but still it comes up constantly. education can be way overrated. growing and learning is inevitable. i am educated, and continue to be educated. i will probably always be in school even when i start working. i will probably be in school til the day i die. i love it. but this is the way i choose to learn, and was reiterated to me as the only option if you want to get somewhere, anywhere, in life. this is not the same for all people, as you know.
westernxer Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC Now all I need to do is figure out how to love and accept myself. That's where a lot of confidence and self assuredness will come from. All I know is, once you've learned to love and accept who you are, you won't give a damn how others feel, because you'll understand what it is that makes you tick. Anything beyond that is just an extra slice of pie. The real reward is self-realization. Forgive the alliteration.
Author ConfusedInOC Posted May 24, 2005 Author Posted May 24, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer All I know is, once you've learned to love and accept who you are, you won't give a damn how others feel, because you'll understand what it is that makes you tick. Anything beyond that is just an extra slice of pie. The real reward is self-realization. Forgive the alliteration. Agreed. Now how do you go about accepting yourself in that manner?
Moose Posted May 24, 2005 Posted May 24, 2005 Agreed. Now how do you go about accepting yourself in that manner?I'd say first you need to realize that noone is better, or worse than anyone else. We are all equals no matter what kind of education you have, or position in life. You have to get that mindset, doesn't matter what anyone else says or do. They are no higher, or lower than you. Level your playing field a bit. Once your on that plane, you'll naturally take the next steps.
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