Wewon Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 How so? The only time I ever yelled at a woman was the end of my first relationship when my ex cheated on me. Other than situations like that, I'd rather not get angry. It's not a good way to express yourself or communicate to a partner. Now I'll call them out on things that are ridiculous, but I definitely pick my battles. In the other thread the woman kept unfavorably comparing her current bf to celeb crushes, ignoring his request to stop until he snapped and told her to shut up. Its analogous to your statement because this is the kind of woman that meets that kind of guy and gets mistreated and can't figure out why. That's my speculation on what the other poster meant. 1
loveflower Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 In the other thread the woman kept unfavorably comparing her current bf to celeb crushes, ignoring his request to stop until he snapped and told her to shut up. Its analogous to your statement because this is the kind of woman that meets that kind of guy and gets mistreated and can't figure out why. That's my speculation on what the other poster meant. Right! you got me. That guy treats his gf with utmost respect while the gf totally disrespect him. she wants Mr. Grey type of guy who will treat her roughly and dominate her.
Woggle Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 This sounds like a female version of some MGTOW propoganda. Man or woman if you run into the same situation every time maybe it is time to look in the mirror. 1
LostOnes05 Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 Right! you got me. That guy treats his gf with utmost respect while the gf totally disrespect him. she wants Mr. Grey type of guy who will treat her roughly and dominate her. Ahh, I gotcha. I actually wrote a longer response to this, but my computer decided it was not to be. I understand what you mean. The problem is when they finish getting dominated, treated poorly and ultimately dumped. The feelings they didn't express to the guy who treated them poorly get projected onto the guy who is actually being good to them. 1
Woggle Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 Ahh, I gotcha. I actually wrote a longer response to this, but my computer decided it was not to be. I understand what you mean. The problem is when they finish getting dominated, treated poorly and ultimately dumped. The feelings they didn't express to the guy who treated them poorly get projected onto the guy who is actually being good to them. Yup. Instead of standing up to the men who wronged them male bashers usually take it out on men who have done nothing wrong. 1
Miss Peach Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 I have talked to some of my male friends about this. They often tell me they have trouble meeting a woman who is dinner-worthy (similar to the sponge worthy episode of Seinfield). I think both sexes are doing the same bad behaviors and complain not realizing the double standards. 2
Tayla Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 Choose wisely when dating. Leave your baggage with the past. This is not gender specific, its human courtesy. 2
Woggle Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 I have talked to some of my male friends about this. They often tell me they have trouble meeting a woman who is dinner-worthy (similar to the sponge worthy episode of Seinfield). I think both sexes are doing the same bad behaviors and complain not realizing the double standards. I agree. Modern relationships have become a bunch of people in glass houses throwing stones at each other. 2
craw Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 'Sex makes you feel good in the moment because you're producing positive chemicals and pheromones, but if he doesn't text or call you the next day you don't feel very good at all. You feel used, as I often have. So sex comes with very big highs and very big lows and you have got to be able to navigate them.' This happens at any age, no doubt.
craw Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Who here is actually in their 50's and are dating? I have a very good friend, she's positive, warm, friendly, good looking and has been dating men who have no interest in a relationship. Mind you, she dates all sorts of men. So not superficial in the slightest. She even recently encountered having a dik pic being sent to her and was traumatised by it! Oh and its from a college professor who should know better. 1
craw Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 The biggest coward of a man is to awaken the love of a woman without the intention of loving her. Bob Marley 4
Author Toodaloo Posted October 23, 2015 Author Posted October 23, 2015 I thought you had found someone you were enthusiastic about a month or two ago? Same guy? And you haven't run him through the grinder yet? You might be talking about the boxer... He disappeared for a week. Turns out he has PTSD and does that quite a bit... Still in contact as friends but I can't live with someone disappearing with no explanation all the time. He also wants to move to another country so its bit of a no brainer. Or are you talking about the guy I met a couple of weeks ago? If that is the case - I am working on it! Thankfully so is he!!! Unlike the women in this article I haven't given up, nor am I blaming the entire male population for the errors of the few. If I get my way the poor man will be raw by the time I am finished... Something tells me is is looking forward to it even if he is a bit scared!!!! 2
Author Toodaloo Posted October 23, 2015 Author Posted October 23, 2015 I think both sexes are doing the same bad behaviors and complain not realizing the double standards. I just wanted to highlight this... Perhaps the word "ignoring" could also be used instead of realising... Just saying... 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 The biggest coward of a man is to awaken the love of a woman without the intention of loving her. Bob Marley That's a case of the pot calling the kettle black. The way the guy 'used' women is breath-taking. 7. Bob was well known for being a bit of a ladies man. Throughout his life he had an involvement in many different women’s lives. Several of these women bore him children - he had one main chat-up line: “Yuh wan have ma baby?” Apparently he used this a little bit too much. 2
preraph Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 It's hard for me to have any sympathy for young men in their sexual prime who complain of have trouble attracting the girl they feel they're entitled to because when women hit their sexual prime, they're in their 40s and 50s, right when men lose all interest in them and, unless they're already married, spend the next years celibate. It's a good waste of prime horseflesh. 1
Wewon Posted October 24, 2015 Posted October 24, 2015 It's hard for me to have any sympathy for young men in their sexual prime who complain of have trouble attracting the girl they feel they're entitled to because when women hit their sexual prime, they're in their 40s and 50s, right when men lose all interest in them and, unless they're already married, spend the next years celibate. It's a good waste of prime horseflesh. Best case scenario you have to see this as nothing more than life isn't fair. Neither gender at "fault" its just the way we're all wired sexually along with when things seem to favor us more. The argument could very easily be made that the same women that complain about their celibacy in middle age or men their own age dating younger women didn't have a problem with this narrative when they were the younger woman who was shunning men her own age. Many of those women were probably dating men 10 years their senior when they were younger and never once was bothered men their own age being on the outside looking in. Its only worthy of note when it happens to them. I always thought that this was some odd cosmic justice for the roles to reverse so completely in ones lifetime. 2
sambolini Posted October 24, 2015 Posted October 24, 2015 It's hard for me to have any sympathy for young men in their sexual prime who complain of have trouble attracting the girl they feel they're entitled to because when women hit their sexual prime, they're in their 40s and 50s, right when men lose all interest in them and, unless they're already married, spend the next years celibate. It's a good waste of prime horseflesh. I'm almost 36. I would love to meet a woman in her forties. Doesn't want more kids, has an established career, in her sexual prime...gimme gimme gimme. What I've found is that many women (not all, of course) don't maintain themselves when they approach forty. They let themselves go somewhat. There's a woman in my work building who's probably in her late forties. She's in good shape, has a great smile, and is very personable. She's married, but she makes a point to smile and talk to me sometimes. If she wasn't married, I'd love to find out what she's capable of! I check her out every time I see her. Not all men overlook women in their forties. But, just like with any human being, she has to be able to attract members of the opposite sex. Same rules apply, no matter the age.
RedRobin Posted October 24, 2015 Posted October 24, 2015 It is very possible that they are having a tough time finding suitable prospects where they are. It took me years to escape upstate NY after the death of my fiancée... Which occurred in 30s. My prospects then became younger men trying to get their learn on and likely not serious relationship prospects... Attractive similar age men with serious issues (bankruptcy, mental illness, substance abuse problems), or older, unattractive men with who knows what issues (I don't date older men). Sprinkled in with married guys looking for a fling. Or some bitter divorced men expecting women to settle for being their f-buddy while they juggle who knows how many women. Those were my prospects living in Upstate NY. I had maybe two good relationships the entire time I lived there. The area is known for having many more women than men, so it was tough to meet good men. I did OLD, volunteer work, am active in other social groups... Running, biking, etc... Just not much there. So, I moved. If the women are truly convinced there are no good men there... And they might be right... They need to expand their search or move. Join groups where men go. I mean, joining a woman centric group is great for building friendships and emotional support... But you have to go where the men are. Even then, it ain't easy. I have a lot of hobbies that people would consider male centric... I probably could have moved earlier, but my fiancées death happened at the onset of the global recession. No great job prospects in places where the men are. Things turned around, and I landed a great job in a place I love. Finally. Long story short... They may be right that there are no good men where they are. But they are somewhere... They might just need to look harder and longer than they did when they were younger.
LoveRefreshed Posted October 25, 2015 Posted October 25, 2015 (edited) Late to the show, but I have a hard time caring. I am sure this girl turned down several men who wanted to shower her in love.. because they were short or bald or had a crooked tooth. Meh. 17 years of a woman being lonely and single has little to do with men I'd guess. OMG, I'm rolling now. "'Rejecting advances is not something that, at my age, I have to contend with very often but part of my work is teaching young girls that sex should be a reward for men who put them on a pedestal and treat them well,' says Shirley." PUT THEM ON A PEDESTAL, SHE SAID. SEX IS A REWARD, SHE SAID. I wonder if the exes they all dumped read this and giggled to themselves... Oh Schadenfreude. None of these have anything to with mistreatment of men, rather the obvious bleak dating prospects post middle age. I guarantee you that all of them have some reason that they aren't getting dates. It's so easy to blame everyone else. I did it when I was in college. A lot of men sit there and say it's because they are nice and women don't want nice guys, all the while you ladies tell them that it's them! They are needy, clingy, unattractive, etc... You will get no sympathy from a man here on this garbage. Edited October 26, 2015 by LoveRefreshed
Miss Peach Posted October 26, 2015 Posted October 26, 2015 Who here is actually in their 50's and are dating? I have a very good friend, she's positive, warm, friendly, good looking and has been dating men who have no interest in a relationship. Mind you, she dates all sorts of men. So not superficial in the slightest. She even recently encountered having a dik pic being sent to her and was traumatised by it! Oh and its from a college professor who should know better. I have a few male friends in their 50s and 60s. They all comment they just don't really care if they get into a relationship at this point. One just wants to get attention and maybe enter something casual. The other will only jump into a serious relationship but has given up on OLD. Both of them have very high bars to get into anything. Not sure if this is the reason why but men's hormones start changing in their mid 40s. They become more like women's hormones. Dr. Pat Allen talks about this a lot in her seminars.
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