sparkles_and_me Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 I met this guy from Tinder last Sunday. He was the first person who I met from Tinder who brought me flowers and little gifts on our first meeting. We actually just spend talking inside his car because I only have an hour since I had some place to go to at a certain time. He asked me right away if I wanted to be exclusive with him, my initial answer was I don't really know because I don't know him yet and it was our first meeting. He said his piece about how it's going to be a good choice to be his gf early on. Oh boy! He was insistent. He has been texting me daily ever since. And calling me as well which I try to avoid answering. Mind you, his messages are like paragraphs long and I don't really have time to read them. I find it weird. And he sent me pictures of myself edited in an app which I found creepy as well. I know he was just trying to be sweet. He seems like a really nice guy but just awkward. He told me that he acts like that because he really likes me. I agreed to seeing him this Sunday to give it another shot and get to know him and have a feel. I don't know if I should continue with the plan on Sunday or let him know that this will never work.
Truth34 Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 Yeah he does seem a bit over the top. But, in todays age with everyone flaking, go out on Sunday and let it be decided then. If you arent completely turned off by his behaviour by now than there is obviously something about the dude you can stomach. So lay down some ground rules and see what his reaction is on Sunday. 1
Guyouthere Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 I met this guy from Tinder last Sunday. He was the first person who I met from Tinder who brought me flowers and little gifts on our first meeting. We actually just spend talking inside his car because I only have an hour since I had some place to go to at a certain time. He asked me right away if I wanted to be exclusive with him, my initial answer was I don't really know because I don't know him yet and it was our first meeting. He said his piece about how it's going to be a good choice to be his gf early on. Oh boy! He was insistent. He has been texting me daily ever since. And calling me as well which I try to avoid answering. Mind you, his messages are like paragraphs long and I don't really have time to read them. I find it weird. And he sent me pictures of myself edited in an app which I found creepy as well. I know he was just trying to be sweet. He seems like a really nice guy but just awkward. He told me that he acts like that because he really likes me. I agreed to seeing him this Sunday to give it another shot and get to know him and have a feel. I don't know if I should continue with the plan on Sunday or let him know that this will never work. I dunno, even your post to me creeps me out for some reason. In plain English, I would be very concerned about the guy you speak of. It seems to me that he is doing a "little too much" for so early in the "relationship". Long ago, when I went on one of my first dates ever in my life, I had given a girl a "red rose" first time I met her. I felt it creeped her out, I could tell. I was questioned about it by her, and I honestly told her, well, I thought girls like flowers. I think she saw it as,, "I love you" or something, which was never my intention. I was new to dating as a whole, so really didn't know what I was doing. But, my advice, I wouldn't proceed. He is making things with your pics? I made videos for my last girl using her pics and music, some elaborate productions too, but that was well after we had an established relationship.
Redhead14 Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 I met this guy from Tinder last Sunday. He was the first person who I met from Tinder who brought me flowers and little gifts on our first meeting. We actually just spend talking inside his car because I only have an hour since I had some place to go to at a certain time. He asked me right away if I wanted to be exclusive with him, my initial answer was I don't really know because I don't know him yet and it was our first meeting. He said his piece about how it's going to be a good choice to be his gf early on. Oh boy! He was insistent. He has been texting me daily ever since. And calling me as well which I try to avoid answering. Mind you, his messages are like paragraphs long and I don't really have time to read them. I find it weird. And he sent me pictures of myself edited in an app which I found creepy as well. I know he was just trying to be sweet. He seems like a really nice guy but just awkward. He told me that he acts like that because he really likes me. I agreed to seeing him this Sunday to give it another shot and get to know him and have a feel. I don't know if I should continue with the plan on Sunday or let him know that this will never work. Oh, holy cow. This guy is over the top. And, you were in his car on the first meeting? Bad, unsafe move. A first meeting from OLD is a short meet up for coffee or a couple of drinks. The purpose of this meeting is simply to verify that they are who they say they are and look like their pictures and if there is enough there for you to decide to go on a "real" date. They don't pick you up, you don't sit in their car, etc. Bringing gifts to this meeting is inappropriate and desperate in my opinion. Asking to be exclusive is way out of line and an act of desperateness. As for going with him on Sunday, that's your call. It's just one real date, but don't be alone with him at any point. He may just be trying to be sweet, but I think he's just desperate and/or blowtorching you. 8
almond Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 Abort mission. This guy's actions just scream "mentally unstable." I would absolutely run a mile if I were you. How did he even get photos of you to edit and send back? Asking to be exclusive after sitting in his car with you for an hour? Wtf. No. Just no. 9
Michelle ma Belle Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 Hmm, this feels really over the top and wreaks of desperation. Tread carefully OP. 1
EricaH329 Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 If it was just the flowers and small gifts, i'd be able to (personally) look passed it. But there's just so much more than that. Asking to be exclusive after only meeting for an hour? How in the world would he know you well enough to want that type of commitment? Texting you novels and calling constantly? Would you even want that if it were an established relationship? The editing of your pictures - that's just creepy to me. Like a sociopath with too much time on his hands. Yes, this guy could just be awkward. However, given everything he's done, i'm leaning more towards mentally unstable. I wouldn't go out with this guy again. That's just my opinion. 2
OK_computer Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 (edited) I met this guy from Tinder last Sunday. He was the first person who I met from Tinder who brought me flowers and little gifts on our first meeting. We actually just spend talking inside his car because I only have an hour since I had some place to go to at a certain time. He asked me right away if I wanted to be exclusive with him, my initial answer was I don't really know because I don't know him yet and it was our first meeting. He said his piece about how it's going to be a good choice to be his gf early on. Oh boy! He was insistent. He has been texting me daily ever since. And calling me as well which I try to avoid answering. Mind you, his messages are like paragraphs long and I don't really have time to read them. I find it weird. And he sent me pictures of myself edited in an app which I found creepy as well. I know he was just trying to be sweet. He seems like a really nice guy but just awkward. He told me that he acts like that because he really likes me. I agreed to seeing him this Sunday to give it another shot and get to know him and have a feel. I don't know if I should continue with the plan on Sunday or let him know that this will never work. What is the content of his texts? Maybe he hasn't had attention from the other gender in a long time and he doesn't know how to act. I'd give him a chance, in a safe environment. Some people like awkward and weird personalities, they're also usually very loyal. I consider myself to be super weird, heck I love talking about aliens, space, old muscle cars no one knows about, deep brain stimulation, ghosts, occult medical practices of hippocrates, WW2 fighter planes, saturns moons, tinnitus, but mostly gory surgical procedures. Then again I am an MD. lol Edited October 22, 2015 by OK_computer
losangelena Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 On a first date? No, no, no. Gifts and flower—strike one Asking for exclusivity—strike two Continual messaging/calling—strike three I'd be outta there if I were you. 1
boltam Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 He's wacked with all that immediate exclusivity request, the flowers, and all the calling and texting. This not someone you're going to want to get involved with. If you insist on giving it another go, then tell him he's way over the top with wanting to be exclusive right away and all those lengthly texts. If he gets the message and doesn't do it anymore then maybe there's a chance, albeit very slim.
Author sparkles_and_me Posted October 23, 2015 Author Posted October 23, 2015 What is the content of his texts? Maybe he hasn't had attention from the other gender in a long time and he doesn't know how to act. I'd give him a chance, in a safe environment. Some people like awkward and weird personalities, they're also usually very loyal. I consider myself to be super weird, heck I love talking about aliens, space, old muscle cars no one knows about, deep brain stimulation, ghosts, occult medical practices of hippocrates, WW2 fighter planes, saturns moons, tinnitus, but mostly gory surgical procedures. Then again I am an MD. lol His messages are all about how we can be wonderful together. We are destined to be with each other. That he is so happy that he met me and I came into his life. He would tell me how much he misses me. I would stop responding and not read the rest of the messages because it really creeped me out. I called him out for everything he was doing but he told me that he just does them/says what is on his mind. I said ok but he won't stop sending me super long messages, he stopped sending my edited pics though. I know this isn't normal, something is messed up somewhere.
almond Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 His messages are all about how we can be wonderful together. We are destined to be with each other. That he is so happy that he met me and I came into his life. He would tell me how much he misses me. I would stop responding and not read the rest of the messages because it really creeped me out. I called him out for everything he was doing but he told me that he just does them/says what is on his mind. I said ok but he won't stop sending me super long messages, he stopped sending my edited pics though. I know this isn't normal, something is messed up somewhere. Run Forrest, run! 6
kilgore Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Run Forrest, run! Almond how are you? Long time no post
Popsicle Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Is he super hot? Because it would be okay then.
Author sparkles_and_me Posted October 23, 2015 Author Posted October 23, 2015 Is he super hot? Because it would be okay then. Haha! I don't think it would make a difference but to answer that question, no he is not. 2
TunaCat Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 OP, I wouldn't even go on a second date with this guy. His behavior would have turned me off completely. So run away from this guy.
mortensorchid Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 I don't think he's weird. I think he's desperate and unstable. I would not give him the time of day if he's being like this. 2
Guyouthere Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 He's wacked with all that immediate exclusivity request, the flowers, and all the calling and texting. This not someone you're going to want to get involved with. If you insist on giving it another go, then tell him he's way over the top with wanting to be exclusive right away and all those lengthly texts. If he gets the message and doesn't do it anymore then maybe there's a chance, albeit very slim. I think he has already shown plenty of mental instability. The "exclusivity" thing really bothers me. Hell, obviously I didn't know my last girl well enough, but at least we had thousands of hours of contact before I had any real deep feelings towards her.
Guyouthere Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Is he super hot? Because it would be okay then. I'm super hot but don't do this. lol Does that make a guy more acceptable? hehehe
seekingluck Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Sounds like a person to throw back to me. Reminds me of a guy I met on Tinder. I had an OK time, but I wasn't attracted. He was aggressive about getting me back to his apartment and all sorts of stuff. I thought *sketchy.* He kept calling me and calling me, I ignored him. He texted me and texted me. I ignored. He eventually called me from a blocked number and said "I was worried that you were sick, so I just wanted to talk to you." I hung up and blocked his number. He still kept reaching out on Tinder every couple of months. Always be wary of people who do too much contacting too soon!
Author sparkles_and_me Posted October 23, 2015 Author Posted October 23, 2015 He hasn't texted me all day so I thought he got the hint. But I was wrong, he just texted with the usual long message but I didn't respond to it, so he followed it up with 3 calls but didn't answer as well. I'm blocking him off now... 2
TaraMaiden2 Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 THis sounds EXACTLY like the kind of guy who, if you were ever totally insane enough to give him an open door, would end up attempting to control every single aspect of your life, in order to create the person he wants you to be. He would end up choosing your clothes for you, your make-up, workplace, friends and even keep you from your family because a guy like this wants to possess every gram of you and your existence. Yeah, why not? Give it a shot! No, don't. Block, delete deny abandon. he doesn't know where you live/work, does he....? 1
losangelena Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 He hasn't texted me all day so I thought he got the hint. But I was wrong, he just texted with the usual long message but I didn't respond to it, so he followed it up with 3 calls but didn't answer as well. I'm blocking him off now... Ugh. Good. I went out with a guy like that once. He'd text, I wouldn't answer. He'd call, I wouldn't pick up. He'd keep calling until I was like WHAT? Eventually I had to explicitly tell him to go away, and he did. Blocking works, too, I suppose.
anika99 Posted October 23, 2015 Posted October 23, 2015 Right now he is hiding his controlling obsessive/possessive personality behind sweetness and compliments but he sounds like the type of guy who would become abusive if he ever got you on his hook. Definitely block him. He is a scary guy. 1
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