Piddle Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 (edited) I have a friend and he's suddenly started quarrelling with me all the time. Almost being mean. I don't mean anything drastic, I would never take that, more like when we talk he'll pass comments like 'you never make the right decisions', 'you're useless at doing that' blah blah. He'd spent weeks making fun of me for liking something, then the one day it slips out that he likes it too. When I challenged him he just said 'oh I can make fun of you all I like'. I do get right back at him so it's not like I take it but it's like he suddenly enjoys saying and doing things that he knows annoy me and will get me angry. Like he knows I love birds and he'll say how horrible all birds are coz they mess everywhere, although last time he said that I got really upset and he doesn't say that anymore. I don't get it. What's the point in picking up the phone to someone and then just argue with them for 30 minutes and then be like 'laters'. It's just like suddenly I really irritate him or in winding me up he relaxes himself or some cr*p like that. I'm getting mad at it all and don't see the point in carrying on the friendship anymore, it's just irritating and immature. Edited October 21, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs and move to Friendship forum
basil67 Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 You're right - there is no point in spending time with a person who is deliberately annoying and critical. Only ever spend time with people who's company you enjoy. And those criticisms he's making of you - don't take them lightly. They are mean spirited. Talk to him again but don't challenge him. Thing is, he probably sees a challenge as part of the 'game'. Instead, talk about how it hurts you and you aren't liking this new way of your friendship. If he knows it hurts you but says he will continue teasing, end the friendship then and there.
truthtripper Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 Hey Piddle, check out the abuse forum on this site. From what you've described, your friend has some anti-social narcissistic traits. I'm sure you will relate to what posters have written in the 'narcissistic abuse' thread. It would be wise to end the friendship. He will only keep hurting you. Protect yourself and stick with people who respect you for who you are. 1
isabellemarss Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 It's best to distance yourself away from him because it appears that the friendship has become really negative and I don't see how it can positively affect your life. If he incessantly insults you and brings you down, you shouldn't tolerate it. That's just not going to go away. Think of your own emotional well-being and stay away from him. You don't need such negativity in your life if you can help it.
preraph Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 He's an abusive guy and his tactic here is to try to make you feel useless and tear down your self-esteem low enough that you will feel lucky to put up with his abuse. You need to cut him completely out of your life. If he will do that, he will also run your friends off and lie about you to keep people away.
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