kitty12345 Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 Hi guys I'm new to this forum and have never posted before. I'm 28 and the woman I like is 25. We have mutual friends and go the same uni. To make it short, I tried to make her jealous by flirting with another girl in her presence and she has now dumped me ! I did this to speed up as wanted to take things to the next level. She has stopped talking to me. Not even a word,duh ! I dont like the other girl - At.All. One thing is sure that my ( ! ) girl likes me , otherwise wont ' dump' me but she has she lost all interest in me ? I want to ask her friends but what if she hasnt told them about me then it would be awkward.I dont see any change in the friends , so feel as if she hasnt told them. Urgh ! What do I do ? Is there anything I can do ? I like her a lot and I know she likes me. We had such nice conversations ! I miss her and want her.
Redhead14 Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 Hi guys I'm new to this forum and have never posted before. I'm 28 and the woman I like is 25. We have mutual friends and go the same uni. To make it short, I tried to make her jealous by flirting with another girl in her presence and she has now dumped me ! I did this to speed up as wanted to take things to the next level. She has stopped talking to me. Not even a word,duh ! I dont like the other girl - At.All. One thing is sure that my ( ! ) girl likes me , otherwise wont ' dump' me but she has she lost all interest in me ? I want to ask her friends but what if she hasnt told them about me then it would be awkward.I dont see any change in the friends , so feel as if she hasnt told them. Urgh ! What do I do ? Is there anything I can do ? I like her a lot and I know she likes me. We had such nice conversations ! I miss her and want her. Is there anything you can do? -- Yes . . . grow up. Leave this girl alone and get real with yourself. Sorry to be harsh, but, seriously? You wanted to speed things up. When you start messing with trying to make things happen, remember this -- for every (stupid) action, there is an equal and opposite reaction . . . 8
GorillaTheater Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 I tried to make her jealous by flirting with another girl in her presence and she has now dumped me ! Of course she dumped you. If a woman tried a bone-headed move like that with me, I'd do the same. Like I just told another poster, live and learn. You f*cked up. Learn the lesson and move on.
katiegrl Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 Hi guys I'm new to this forum and have never posted before. I'm 28 and the woman I like is 25. We have mutual friends and go the same uni. To make it short, I tried to make her jealous by flirting with another girl in her presence and she has now dumped me ! I did this to speed up as wanted to take things to the next level. She has stopped talking to me. Not even a word,duh ! I dont like the other girl - At.All. One thing is sure that my ( ! ) girl likes me , otherwise wont ' dump' me but she has she lost all interest in me ? I want to ask her friends but what if she hasnt told them about me then it would be awkward.I dont see any change in the friends , so feel as if she hasnt told them. Urgh ! What do I do ? Is there anything I can do ? I like her a lot and I know she likes me. We had such nice conversations ! I miss her and want her. What you do is learn from this and don't pull that shyt again. As for this girl, all you know is that she *used* to like you. Speaking personally, when I was dating, I would lose interest in a guy REAL fast when he played stupid jealousy games like that. Speaks to your character... I think you blew it dude, learn from it. 1
katiegrl Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 What you do is learn from this and don't pull that shyt again. As for this girl, all you know is that she *used* to like you. Speaking personally, when I was dating, I would lose interest in a guy REAL fast when he played stupid jealousy games like that. Speaks to your character... I think you blew it dude, learn from it. OP, with a moniker like kitty, is it safe to presume this is a same sex relationship and you are both women? If so, why oh why do lesbians pull this shyt? I have a lesbian friend, and her girlfriend is always playing jealousy games like that. And her gf before her did the same. In fact, the games they play would put most games men play to shame! Why????
Author kitty12345 Posted October 21, 2015 Author Posted October 21, 2015 I know I made a terrible move but lets face it, it does work on some girls. One of my friends did this with a girl he liked and she stepped up. It worked ! It didnt work for my girl, I understand but there has to be something that I can do ? I'm ready to take all the shyt that comes my way but some solution, please guys, I like her a lot. It wasnt going anywhere so I tried and want to make it right.Should I just go to her and accept, apologise even though we arent even dating yet ? Please guys !
Author kitty12345 Posted October 21, 2015 Author Posted October 21, 2015 I am a guy and she is a woman ,lol ! My sister's cat was around me when I was registering to the site
CarrieT Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 It wasn't going anywhere for a reason. You acted like an adolescent and are now paying the price. Live, learn, move on and start acting like an adult - and you will be treated like one. 2
Methodical Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 It's all the games ppl play that make everyone wary. As everyone else has stated, you blew it X2. You played with someone's emotions and feigned a false interest, which is sh*tty, and by doing so you turned someone who was interested against you by disrespecting her up-close and personal. To her, your ploy was a slap in the face.
katiegrl Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 I am a guy and she is a woman ,lol ! My sister's cat was around me when I was registering to the site Oops, okie sorry and tnx for clarifying!
Methodical Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 Hi guys I'm new to this forum and have never posted before. I'm 28 and the woman I like is 25. We have mutual friends and go the same uni. To make it short, I tried to make her jealous by flirting with another girl in her presence and she has now dumped me ! I did this to speed up as wanted to take things to the next level. She has stopped talking to me. Not even a word,duh ! I dont like the other girl - At.All. One thing is sure that my ( ! ) girl likes me , otherwise wont ' dump' me but she has she lost all interest in me ? I want to ask her friends but what if she hasnt told them about me then it would be awkward.I dont see any change in the friends , so feel as if she hasnt told them. Urgh ! What do I do ? Is there anything I can do ? I like her a lot and I know she likes me. We had such nice conversations ! I miss her and want her. I know I made a terrible move but lets face it, it does work on some girls. One of my friends did this with a girl he liked and she stepped up. It worked ! It didnt work for my girl, I understand but there has to be something that I can do ? I'm ready to take all the shyt that comes my way but some solution, please guys, I like her a lot. It wasnt going anywhere so I tried and want to make it right.Should I just go to her and accept, apologise even though we arent even dating yet ? Please guys ! So which is it? Were you dating and tried to take it to the next level, OR, you weren't dating yet?
katiegrl Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 I know I made a terrible move but lets face it, it does work on some girls. One of my friends did this with a girl he liked and she stepped up. It worked ! It didnt work for my girl, I understand but there has to be something that I can do ? I'm ready to take all the shyt that comes my way but some solution, please guys, I like her a lot. It wasnt going anywhere so I tried and want to make it right.Should I just go to her and accept, apologise even though we arent even dating yet ? Please guys ! You might try being honest, admitting you were playing a game, that it was stupid and apologize.... And then leave it. Let her think about what you just said, your honesty, remorse, apology, etc. If I really liked you, for me, I would find that type of raw honesty endearing.....and refreshing.
Author kitty12345 Posted October 21, 2015 Author Posted October 21, 2015 I didnt mean to disrespect her but I guess thats how it came out to be ! Now she goes around as if she gives a damn to me ! Duh ! Has she gotten over me in just 2 weeks ? Or she didnt have any interest in me whatsoever in the first place ? I know for a fact that she liked me. Please guys, slam me as much as you want but one solution,please
Redhead14 Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 I know I made a terrible move but lets face it, it does work on some girls. One of my friends did this with a girl he liked and she stepped up. It worked ! It didnt work for my girl, I understand but there has to be something that I can do ? I'm ready to take all the shyt that comes my way but some solution, please guys, I like her a lot. It wasnt going anywhere so I tried and want to make it right.Should I just go to her and accept, apologise even though we arent even dating yet ? Please guys ! You wanted to make it right by doing something wrong . . . bite the bullet tell her you were stupid and that you hope she will accept your dinner invitation on X day at X place. If she says, no, you graciously and sheepishly back away.
katiegrl Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 I didnt mean to disrespect her but I guess thats how it came out to be ! Now she goes around as if she gives a damn to me ! Duh ! Has she gotten over me in just 2 weeks ? Or she didnt have any interest in me whatsoever in the first place ? I know for a fact that she liked me. Please guys, slam me as much as you want but one solution,please Read my post no. 12. Honesty is best IMO. Stop the game playing!!!
losangelena Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 I didnt mean to disrespect her but I guess thats how it came out to be ! Now she goes around as if she gives a damn to me ! Duh ! Has she gotten over me in just 2 weeks ? Or she didnt have any interest in me whatsoever in the first place ? I know for a fact that she liked me. Please guys, slam me as much as you want but one solution,please OP, I think what we're trying to tell you is that there IS no solution. Why should we give you false hope when there isn't any? I agree with Red—the only shred of hope you have lies in being honest, admitting your bone-headedness, and apologizing. Don't do it over text message. If she replies, great. If not, it's over. 2
StBreton Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 Hey Kit I would have had a wtf moment if a guy did that. She's thinking you're a player! Every day ...one does things to draw others closer to them or push them away ...your behavior well you know which category it falls into. So it worked for a friend you say? What ...have you and your friends written a playbook like a football playbook for dealing with woman? Ya we're not balls ...but you've got a lot of 'em for what you did. FYI ...it worked with the other girl because she enjoys crazy business / drama (you must must ask yourself "would I want a girl who responds to this shyt?" NO!) ...you had a nice girl with good values...she knew what to do with you ...hello guy ...meet curb. You blew the Super Bowl of girls. 1
Redhead14 Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 I didnt mean to disrespect her but I guess thats how it came out to be ! Now she goes around as if she gives a damn to me ! Duh ! Has she gotten over me in just 2 weeks ? Or she didnt have any interest in me whatsoever in the first place ? I know for a fact that she liked me. Please guys, slam me as much as you want but one solution,please Has she gotten over me in just 2 weeks ? -- You two weren't even dating. There's nothing to get over. Maybe she liked you before you dissed her. You want a solution -- a magic cure for lack of common sense in dating women? I gave you a possible solution -- call her, admit your error in judgement and ask her to forgive you. Just be prepared to have her hang up on you. 3
Author kitty12345 Posted October 21, 2015 Author Posted October 21, 2015 She is a nice girl. She wasnt playing any games and neither was I till I got frustrated to move it forward and did this ! I'll bite for her !
StBreton Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 She is a nice girl. She wasnt playing any games and neither was I till I got frustrated to move it forward and did this ! I'll bite for her ! Bite for her?! How about catch a grenade for her lol Then follow the advice in post 19 and hope it works for you
Miss Peach Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 What you do is learn from this and don't pull that shyt again. As for this girl, all you know is that she *used* to like you. Speaking personally, when I was dating, I would lose interest in a guy REAL fast when he played stupid jealousy games like that. Speaks to your character... I think you blew it dude, learn from it. I agree with this. I have dated flirty guys before and am not a jealous person so I am fine with it to an extent. But if the guy does it to the point I have any doubt in his commitment to me or trust he is gone. I agree it speaks to your character. I also agree with the PPs that the women who would respond to that are drama seeking and not the kind you want if you want something serious and long term. Next time if you want to move to the next level just have a conversation with her.
Author kitty12345 Posted October 21, 2015 Author Posted October 21, 2015 We are ( were ! ) talking but it was more friendly but more than friends vibe is ( was ! ) there. Its just I didnt know how to steer it correctly , if it makes sense. Looking at it differently,does her going cold on me mean ( apart from me being a jerk ) , that she likes me and cant bear the thought of seeing me with someone else ? ( I need some pep up to go ahead ! ) I'm not even trying to shield myself so, punch away but please give some views from her side ( positive ! )
Methodical Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 We are ( were ! ) talking but it was more friendly but more than friends vibe is ( was ! ) there. Its just I didnt know how to steer it correctly , if it makes sense. Looking at it differently,does her going cold on me mean ( apart from me being a jerk ) , that she likes me and cant bear the thought of seeing me with someone else ? ( I need some pep up to go ahead ! ) I'm not even trying to shield myself so, punch away but please give some views from her side ( positive ! ) NO. You are projecting bc her reaction is polar opposite of what you hoped to accomplish. She doesn't have a personal vested interest. After seeing how you treat someone you are supposedly interested in, you repulsed her and she doesn't want to get involved or have an association like that. Sugarcoating it isn't going to change what you did. You have already been given the best advice possible. # 19 Do it and move on. 1
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