bohica Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 Hello LS people I'm not sure if I'm in the right section for this. I've had a lot of problems dating the past few years. A few things here and there but nothing worth talking about. I have to start by saying I have no problems meeting women but it's been a long time since I've met someone I have a great deal of mutual chemistry with. The biggest issue is that I am never, never attracted to women my own age. I find we are so different. I am a 47 yr old man. I'm in shape, active and look young for my age. Additionally, the women who are attracted to me, the ones who are forward anyway, most often ARE women older then me. Women in there 50's. The women I am usually attracted to are 10 or more yrs younger but they rarely look my way these days. I fear that the way things are going I won't meet someone. Not sure if I'm looking for advise here or just venting.....
Lois_Griffin Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 The women I am usually attracted to are 10 or more yrs younger but they rarely look my way these days..... Rut roh. Methinks your mirror is lying to you then, if women 10 years younger than you aren't even giving you a second glance anymore. 4
PegNosePete Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 look young for my age Do you know what percentage of people say that? Sorry... 4
Art_Critic Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 The women I am usually attracted to are 10 or more yrs younger but they rarely look my way these days. Time to make a corrective action in your dating then.... Nothing wrong with being attracted to younger women..many guys are.. but you have to be realistic if you want to find someone to connect with. 2
stillafool Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 Hello LS people The biggest issue is that I am never, never attracted to women my own age. I find we are so different. I am a 47 yr old man. I'm in shape, active and look young for my age. Additionally, the women who are attracted to me, the ones who are forward anyway, most often ARE women older then me. Women in there 50's. The women I am usually attracted to are 10 or more yrs younger but they rarely look my way these days. I fear that the way things are going I won't meet someone. Not sure if I'm looking for advise here or just venting..... How are these women different from you? Also if you are attracted to younger women why don't you hit on them? Why are you expecting them to approach you? 2
Eternal Sunshine Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 Do you know what percentage of people say that? Sorry... Mostly men.
Author bohica Posted October 20, 2015 Author Posted October 20, 2015 (edited) Rut roh. Methinks your mirror is lying to you then, if women 10 years younger than you aren't even giving you a second glance anymore. Are you Lois Griffin or Scooby Doo ? Yes, I really do look younger. Younger and older women tell me I do. Yes, women younger are attracted to me and I do date younger women. I said they rarely look my way. I know a lot of men say the same thing. It sounds so cliche. I understand. I am open minded and it doesn't have all to do with looks. A lot of women I meet my age are intelligent, beautiful women inside. I just don't find I am attracted to them. We don't have much in common. Additionally, I get a lot of much OLDER women attracted to me. My mother is only 20yrs older then me so when a 55-60 yr old women is attracted to me I'm not interested. Not only because she looks older... I know it's something I need to work on and I've tried. Edited October 20, 2015 by bohica
SammySammy Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 You're missing out. Some of the best sex ever .... I'm around the same age. Attracted to younger, older ... a wide range. I'm pleasantly surprised by women in their 40s though. I know what you're attracted to is your choice, but your bias against women your age is doing you a disservice. JMO 2
Author bohica Posted October 20, 2015 Author Posted October 20, 2015 How are these women different from you? Also if you are attracted to younger women why don't you hit on them? Why are you expecting them to approach you? I do not expect anything. I don't think I said that or implied it. I do approach younger women but it's not because I look across a room and say hey theirs a younger women let me go speak to her. I'm saying the majority of women that are attracted to me are with in my age range or much older. It's been a while since I've had a lot of chemistry with someone and I'm not finding myself at all interested in anyone I meet that is my own age. Not at all. I've just been reflecting upon this all lately and I'm actually beginning to think it's preventing me from meeting someone because it narrows the field for me. Maybe I am just meeting the wrong women my own age.
Author bohica Posted October 20, 2015 Author Posted October 20, 2015 You're missing out. Some of the best sex ever .... I'm around the same age. Attracted to younger, older ... a wide range. I'm pleasantly surprised by women in their 40s though. I know what you're attracted to is your choice, but your bias against women your age is doing you a disservice. JMO I hear you on that. I understand. I don't consider it a Bias because it's just something that happens naturally most of the time.
Art_Critic Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 I've just been reflecting upon this all lately and I'm actually beginning to think it's preventing me from meeting someone because it narrows the field for me. Maybe I am just meeting the wrong women my own age. It does narrow your field, and you must not be meeting the right women your age or a little younger.. I know women 39-45 that are smoking hot and great people.. I married one and still know of a bunch more... I remember a phase I went thru.. a short one.. dating 10-11 years younger at one time and honestly never understood why they were dating me unless it was security/money and that certainly wasn't what I needed, I also didn't have anything in common with someone so young. You mentioned your Mom is 20 years younger than you and dating someone 10 or so years older than you gives you the jeebies... well.. think about it the other way around... You are 10 plus years older than they are, you are closer to the age of their parents too.... You are attracted to what you are attracted to but being only attracted to younger women might be a difficult hurdle to overcome 2
Author bohica Posted October 20, 2015 Author Posted October 20, 2015 It does narrow your field, and you must not be meeting the right women your age or a little younger.. I know women 39-45 that are smoking hot and great people.. I married one and still know of a bunch more... You are attracted to what you are attracted to but being only attracted to younger women might be a difficult hurdle to overcome I know and to be honest a few yrs younger isn't too much of a problem. I'm not talking about 15 yrs younger or so. With in 10 yrs but the number has less to do with it then anything else. The biggest thing I should really hit home is that it seems that the majority of women attracted to me are either my age and I find no attraction or much much older. I get hit on all the time by older women. Women who look a lot older with whom I have nothing in common with and I'm not attracted to physically.
WonderKid Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 I look young for my age. If course, black people are like vamps, we age slowly. XD But, I am in my mid 20s, mistaken for a teen still, and I get hit on by older women more than I would with a young one. But, I also seem to attract 16 yr olds well, but we all know how that'll go. Lmao
Michelle ma Belle Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 I'm not sure what the problem is. You just told us that you've got it all going on, look young, feel young, have no problems getting women, have dated women of all ages including younger ones etc... Am I missing something? So the majority of women attracted to you are your age or older but not exclusively which means you've tasted the forbidden fruit. We all have a fan base that might not always be our preferred choice but this doesn't seem to be preventing you from meeting or dating younger women. Clearly the chemistry you seek isn't working with the younger women you're dating either so how much of this is about age? Regardless, you like what you like. But if you're waiting for the young ones to approach you then perhaps you need to change your game plan. 1
StBreton Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 Boh ...if you aren't physically attracted to woman your own age ...are you mentally attracted to them? Or are you more mentally attracted to younger woman? I'm in your age range ...a few years older ...and my dating range is 45-55 ...I'm more mentally attracted to guys in this range. I was married to someone for 18 yrs who was 9 yrs younger than me ...I do look younger ...people typically guess me at 41-42 ...my divorce attorney thought my exH was older than I ...STILL ....I prefer to date close to my age ...it's actually refreshing to be with someone close to my age. There are woman who look younger but your age ... Just don't discount them because you dream of a woman who is 10 yrs younger ...in the long run you might be happier with someone close to your age.
siriusp Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 I posted about this about a month ago. I have the same issue - although most of the guys that hit on me are younger! Men of my age (40's) are not attractive for me. I end up with guys in their 20's but they have different goals in life or something. I don't know. They are always surprised when I tell them my age and I don't know if I should tell them that I am younger so they don't freak out. I sometimes wonder if that is off putting for younger guys. I am also starting to think that if I don't meet someone very soon that the age gap will be too big - It's very confusing and I wish I could find men my own age attractive - even guys in their late 30's are not attractive for me. It's very annoying.
StBreton Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 I know and to be honest a few yrs younger isn't too much of a problem. I'm not talking about 15 yrs younger or so. With in 10 yrs but the number has less to do with it then anything else. The biggest thing I should really hit home is that it seems that the majority of women attracted to me are either my age and I find no attraction or much much older. I get hit on all the time by older women. Women who look a lot older with whom I have nothing in common with and I'm not attracted to physically. So you have "no" attraction to woman your age?! Seriously? Do they look like broomhildas to you? Lived a hard life and look 10 yrs older? Where I live a LOT of woman look hot at 47 ...I might live in a unique area known for people taking care of themselves ...that may be a factor Idk. I think you're not seeing what others are seeing ...I think someone mentioned a mirror earlier. You'll be attracted to what your attracted to but if you're finding sufficient people to date and all is good ...why did you start the thread? 2
stillafool Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 I do not expect anything. I don't think I said that or implied it. I do approach younger women but it's not because I look across a room and say hey theirs a younger women let me go speak to her. I'm saying the majority of women that are attracted to me are with in my age range or much older. It's been a while since I've had a lot of chemistry with someone and I'm not finding myself at all interested in anyone I meet that is my own age. Not at all. I've just been reflecting upon this all lately and I'm actually beginning to think it's preventing me from meeting someone because it narrows the field for me. Maybe I am just meeting the wrong women my own age. Why do you feel you have to date women your age if you are not attracted to them? Why not stick to what you want? It seems like a no brainer to me. 1
Author bohica Posted October 20, 2015 Author Posted October 20, 2015 I'm not sure what the problem is. Am I missing something? plan. I've been down on my dating life and lately it seems I only attract older women with whom I am neither attracted to physically or intellectually. That said, it's been a long time since someone I am attracted to shows a lot of interest in me.
stillafool Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 Stop concentrating on women you don't find desirable who are approaching you and just approach the women you find attractive. You are making this harder than it has to be. 1
SammySammy Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 Stop concentrating on women you don't find desirable who are approaching you and just approach the women you find attractive. You are making this harder than it has to be. He said the women he finds attractive don't want him.
No_Go Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 At 47 I don't see a problem dating anyone from 30 to 60. If younger is your preference - fine. But you may ask yourself: 1) why are you attracted to that age range? Is it the looks? Or some other trait of the younger? fixation? 2) if your looks are not the issue, could it be that younger women see behavioral issue? E.g. for me a deal breaker for older guy will be acting "young" (read childish, boyish). I had an ex who was 46 when I was in my late 20s. Among other issues, the thing that made me step out was his immaturity. I expected an older guy to have his life together and not to play second "youth" approaching his fifties. That repulsed me, not the natural aging process. Hello LS people I'm not sure if I'm in the right section for this. I've had a lot of problems dating the past few years. A few things here and there but nothing worth talking about. I have to start by saying I have no problems meeting women but it's been a long time since I've met someone I have a great deal of mutual chemistry with. The biggest issue is that I am never, never attracted to women my own age. I find we are so different. I am a 47 yr old man. I'm in shape, active and look young for my age. Additionally, the women who are attracted to me, the ones who are forward anyway, most often ARE women older then me. Women in there 50's. The women I am usually attracted to are 10 or more yrs younger but they rarely look my way these days. I fear that the way things are going I won't meet someone. Not sure if I'm looking for advise here or just venting..... 2
StBreton Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 OP ...you're not "intellectually" attracted to woman your own age? Hmmmm Most guys who date quite a bit younger actually find they don't mesh well intellectually with these younger woman ...but they sure are attracted to them physically. Many guys in my age range married a second time ...to someone 15-20 yrs younger ...and got divorced again. They said they learned a valuable lesson. Just sayin
stillafool Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 He said the women he finds attractive don't want him. Then he should be talking and thinking about them instead of starting a thread about the ones he isn't attracted to.
Michelle ma Belle Posted October 20, 2015 Posted October 20, 2015 This feels very much like a physical preference than anything else. Not surprising. To say that a man in his forties doesn't have much in common with a woman around the same age is a red flag to me. And vice versa. I'm not saying there aren't exceptions to the rule but it does make me question what's really going on here. I think No Go hit it on the head. Perhaps you need to take a break from dating for a while.
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