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Growth Between Relationships?


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Posted

How have you changed, grown, or have you not changed or grown since your last relationship into your current one? My Boyfriend asked me, if I have changed or grown since my last relationship, which was 4 years ago, I don't know if I have really changed or grown since then. I know, I have not have not had any other Boyfriends since then, until this current one. What about you?

Posted

I think I learn a little after each relationship. Like, what I want in a person, what I can and can't tolerate, what it means for me to be in love, I look back on mistakes I've made and try to change those etc.

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Posted

I agree.

 

In theory, each of us learns something from any relationship. We learn what matters most, we learn what we will or won't tolerate, we learn what's important to us, or what's negotiable, or what's non-negotiable. For me, I've never had any issues finding women of different races, ethnicities, hair color, boob size, or body size (unless, you know it's grotesque - yes I'm a human and need physical attraction too) attractive. For me, I've learned that I need the emotional/affection based connection and that I want someone who's balanced - can be funny but serious - can communicate - has friends & family but isn't a social butterfly. I've also learned a lot about myself and what I need to do better - first of which is finding the right person, then by being more upfront with my hopes, dreams, and more open with my emotions.

 

I think if you don't grow from one to the next you're doomed to making the same mistakes over and over again - even if they manifest themselves in slightly different ways.

Posted

I think that from my last relationship I've learned more about my personal needs in terms of emotional connection/time spent together/methods of communication. I've also learned more about how I like to live my life and that having specific plans improves it greatly. Those are the ways that he and I were not a match. BUT he also taught me a lot about open communication and not just saying what the other person wants to hear. He also helped me rethink some of my issues around jealousy and anxiety.

 

I really appreciate my ex's place in my life. Even though things didn't work out and I wasn't actually very happy with him, I think he's a great person and he taught me a lot.

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