pisces_gurl Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 I am a 21 years old girl and considered very beautiful and hot (I am not bragging but it is necessary to tell in this context). Many people call me beautfiul and as per the beauty standards of society, i fit perfectly. Anyway, the problem more psychological than relationship issue. On multiple occasions, in the past 9-10 months, I have faced one thing. Different men, in my college or anywhere, I will feel are attracted to me. They will stare at me a lot or I will catch them looking at me at multiple occasions and from their aura, vibe or tone of voice, i will get a feeling that they're attracted to me. Usually it's the staring and the 'feel'. The problem is that they will hardly (if ever some of them) approach me. And in turn, i will come to know that they are either already married or with someone else etc. These multiple confusions have led me to believe now that maybe I am taking the WRONG signal. Maybe it's all in my HEAD. And they are not attracted to me in the first place. I get infatuated easily. And if I feel attraction (vibe or staring thing) from someone, i get a crush on them quickly and when they don't approach me or take an action, i feel bad. I want to understand and know what psychological cause would be behind that? How can I 'not' feel a vibe from men? Does staring a lot or smiling or a shift in tone of voice indicate something? I basically 'FEEL' the attraction clues through body language and even for the guys I have hardly ever spoken to. But if there was attraction, wouldn't they approach me? Can someone please give an insight into it? Why am I feeling these vibes for CERTAIN men and not everyone? Why if, they are not attracted towards me? And if they are, then why wouldn't they ever approach me? Some were even rude.
GunslingerRoland Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 I'm married... I'm still attracted to beautiful women though and check them out. I think you're picking up the right signals... but aren't you glad that these married/attached men aren't leading you on or having affairs with you? 1
fred123 Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 I am a 21 years old girl and considered very beautiful and hot (I am not bragging but it is necessary to tell in this context). Many people call me beautfiul and as per the beauty standards of society, i fit perfectly. Anyway, the problem more psychological than relationship issue. On multiple occasions, in the past 9-10 months, I have faced one thing. Different men, in my college or anywhere, I will feel are attracted to me. They will stare at me a lot or I will catch them looking at me at multiple occasions and from their aura, vibe or tone of voice, i will get a feeling that they're attracted to me. Usually it's the staring and the 'feel'. The problem is that they will hardly (if ever some of them) approach me. And in turn, i will come to know that they are either already married or with someone else etc. These multiple confusions have led me to believe now that maybe I am taking the WRONG signal. Maybe it's all in my HEAD. And they are not attracted to me in the first place. I get infatuated easily. And if I feel attraction (vibe or staring thing) from someone, i get a crush on them quickly and when they don't approach me or take an action, i feel bad. I want to understand and know what psychological cause would be behind that? How can I 'not' feel a vibe from men? Does staring a lot or smiling or a shift in tone of voice indicate something? I basically 'FEEL' the attraction clues through body language and even for the guys I have hardly ever spoken to. But if there was attraction, wouldn't they approach me? Can someone please give an insight into it? Why am I feeling these vibes for CERTAIN men and not everyone? Why if, they are not attracted towards me? And if they are, then why wouldn't they ever approach me? Some were even rude. if you are as good looking as you say and i saw you and thought the same i wouldn't approach. i would think you are way out of my league and other guys out there are better than me and you would go for them instead of me so theres no point in even bothering. i would think if i approached id end up being your friend and nothing more.
BLND Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 I'm in the same situation. My good guy friend told me I give off this vibe that I'm taken and not approachable. I've also been told that I'm intimidating. Which I personally find hard to believe because if anything I'm super shy and have a hard time talking to people first. But I do get stared at ALL the time. It's annoying after a while when you want people to come talk to you instead but they don't. When I mention that I'm single nobody believes it yet it's very true.
Vintage79 Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 if you are as good looking as you say and i saw you and thought the same i wouldn't approach. i would think you are way out of my league and other guys out there are better than me and you would go for them instead of me so theres no point in even bothering. i would think if i approached id end up being your friend and nothing more. Wow - someone lacks confidence. Regardless - OP - you are likely picking up on the right signals, but potentially communicating that you're unavailable, uninterested, a b*tch, high maintenance, or a variety of other things that communicate, "not worth the effort".
Author pisces_gurl Posted October 19, 2015 Author Posted October 19, 2015 if you are as good looking as you say and i saw you and thought the same i wouldn't approach. i would think you are way out of my league and other guys out there are better than me and you would go for them instead of me so theres no point in even bothering. i would think if i approached id end up being your friend and nothing more. But I think I do try to give good signals. Like I am very shy and stuff but i do stare at men too plus give them smiles
Author pisces_gurl Posted October 19, 2015 Author Posted October 19, 2015 I'm in the same situation. My good guy friend told me I give off this vibe that I'm taken and not approachable. I've also been told that I'm intimidating. Which I personally find hard to believe because if anything I'm super shy and have a hard time talking to people first. But I do get stared at ALL the time. It's annoying after a while when you want people to come talk to you instead but they don't. When I mention that I'm single nobody believes it yet it's very true. I don't know why is it so! I am very shy too and don't find the courage to talk in PERSON- social media is okay But I do give signals by looking back and smiling too?
Author pisces_gurl Posted October 19, 2015 Author Posted October 19, 2015 Wow - someone lacks confidence. Regardless - OP - you are likely picking up on the right signals, but potentially communicating that you're unavailable, uninterested, a b*tch, high maintenance, or a variety of other things that communicate, "not worth the effort". I don't know what am I communicating When i try to stare back and even sometimes smile :-(
d0nnivain Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 The "taken" men stare from afar because they appreciate what you look like. They stay away because looking is not a terrible thing but more than looking sets them on a slippery slope. Since they are never going to approach you they may be more obvious in their staring & you pick up on that more easily then a shier available guy who is free to approach but too scared to do so. Because you don't pick up on his less than obvious signals, you never encourage him. Instead of being so passive & waiting until you notice some guy liking you or staring at you why not look around to see if you notice a guy you think is attractive. Then smile & say hi to him. Nothing more just hi. If you are as beautiful as you claim, most men will take it from there.
Guyouthere Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 How was your childhood? I have a reason why I ask that. I ask because I did some research on some psychological issues (because I wanted to learn about my last girlfriend). One thing I learned was that some children develop a heightened sense of "awareness" based on their past, which affects their ability to " sense". In plain English, they describe a lot of what you are… the "guys stare at me, and I sense it, etc."
SwordofFlame Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 The guys don't approach either because they're too shy or think they have no chance with you.
casey.lives Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 Because sensations are spontaneous and they are flighty and reasonable people understand that. Beauty produces sensations .. it's a given. You should realize that you're beautiful and you have an effect on most everybody.. but attraction alone is one motivator... There is an undesirable side to being highly attractive and to dating a highly attractive person. What i think you might need to do is to use a different key to your heart rather then the obvious attracting impulses. Lifestyles of the young and beautiful .. : ) : )
Guyouthere Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 The guys don't approach either because they're too shy or think they have no chance with you. A confident guy will.
Miss Peach Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 I know the feeling of being checked out or stared at. I don't think you are imagining it. I suspect one of two things is happening. First is that these guys aren't interested in anything other than looking. It might be because they don't want to date, are in a relationship, etc. Second is that they are interested but you aren't giving them enough signals of interest. I recommend looking up flirting techniques. Make eye contact. Smile. Be alone at times so a guy can approach you without your posse around. Be near him. Stuff like that.
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