Bingbing Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 I'm going to try to make this as short as possible if I can. I dated this girl for almost 5 years. We broke up due to the age difference, me going to college, her being a year below me. Fast forward 5 years later we had still talked on and off over that period. She dated a few other people as did I to a point. Yet after each unsuccessful attempt we both started talking to one another again. Recently we went through a 5 month period with no contact. We ran into eachother and do the how you been, what you been up 2 spiel at a bar. We part and I see her again a couple minutes later crying with her friends after she had messaged me that she bought me a drink and to come see her. Cutting passed the rest it had been because seeing me reminded her of us and that she missed it and compared every guy she's been serious with to me and it just wasn't what she expected. She's been with a guy for about 6 months now after telling me this, currently still together. We chatted for awhile about how things used to be ect. She texted me after a couple weeks wishing me a happy birthday. I said thank you appreciate it(shortened version). We haven't spoken since for about 3 months. She's still with her bf at this time but that night hasn't left me alone since. I know in her heart if she could make a different choice at this moment she would. But our ugly past keeps either one of us from being the person to step past that and make a move. It's already been a long post since me saying it wouldn't be. All in all I'm asking what the heck I should do at this point? I still think about her constantly and I know she does me to. Where do I go from here, or do I leave them alone to go about their business? Any help would be appreciated, thank you everyone with advice.
theredpill Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 Leave them alone, let her come to you, if it's meant to be, she will come back. Please keep your dignity and stay out of their business, keep doing what you're doing, dating, you never know what's around the next corner and it might be her, or someone even better. I too often think about the one that got away, although now I'm older, there's two that got away - so that stick a huge fork in the "one" myth 3
louxor Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 Follow her actions not her words. If she truly missed you and was thinking about you all the time and wanted to be with you, her actions would reflect this. If she wanted to be with you, she would be doing all she could to make this happen. Don't do anything, continue on with your life. If she decides she no longer wants to be with this other guy and wants another shot with you, her actions will reflect that. Once you get into the cycle of reading people based off their actions, not their words, you'll save yourself a whole load of trouble in all areas of life, not just in your romantic relationships. 2
Author Bingbing Posted October 21, 2015 Author Posted October 21, 2015 Appreciate both of your replies. Agreed on the multiple "ones" being a thing. Never really believed that someone just so happened to find that "one" sole person they were meant for. I will keep things as I have, it just really confused me as to why after all these years she can still pull these tears out of her not just a little drop like I regret things, but full on balling her eyes out. Just Confused me a bit which brought about grounds for me making this post. As for the second post I agree on the reading people, considered myself pretty good at it actually. Which brought cause on why she decided to just let go in front of me after so long. I agree though if what she wanted was us she'd be doing what she could to make it happen outside of what I've told you all. All in all I appreciate the responses. Anything else on the topic I'd love to hear it, So keep it coming!
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