Candle037 Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 Hi, I just wanted to get this out there cause I can't make sense of it. A ex that I dated 2 years ago continually is in a relationship with me in my dreams. These dreams are frequent and not realistic as it was very casual. I go on vacation, we've met each others parents, we talk and cuddle, go shopping etc. I haven't thought of this person for a while and we have been no contact for 4 months as it seems continually one of us has checked in on the other previously. We both wanted different things when together. I do miss him but I accept it's over... and I only miss him because of how great these dreams are as we both had our shortcomings. Any thoughts??? Maybe with 4 months I'm realizing this is really over?
Guyouthere Posted October 19, 2015 Posted October 19, 2015 Dreams are the brains way of sorting out emotions, facts, and all inputs. You can also test that as well by doing your own experiment,,,, Just before you sleep, spend some time thinking about anything, but concentrate on it, and you will find that at least the first part of your night, you will have specific dreams related to that which you are thinking. However, what you are describing could very well be repressed emotions that were never dealt with back then, and your mind is still trying to sort them all out. I believe this to be a very accurate explanation of whats going on. I had dreams of my ex wife like that, right after she left me. They went on for a long time, until the divorce was final and I healed. To this day I don't have them anymore. She is gone, they are gone. Your mind is doing the same. 1
Author Candle037 Posted October 21, 2015 Author Posted October 21, 2015 Thanks, I wanted to think about what you said and I will try to keep busy and get on with my life. I miss him and thats all and in time the dreams will stop. I however really want to text or talk to him.
EricaH329 Posted October 21, 2015 Posted October 21, 2015 Dreams like those are the worst!! Unfortunately, they are extremely common. It's your subconscious showing itself - forcing its presence. Which inevitably just leaves us feeling worse I don't have much advice about how to handle it, other then knowing it'll end some day. I'm sorry you are going through this 1
newmoon Posted October 22, 2015 Posted October 22, 2015 i think lots of people go through this. for me, i felt the dreams were illuminating issues i wasn't dealing with, or some emotions i was still feeling, etc. as time went on the dreams completely went away. it also helped me to think of him more negatively; the dreams were always very positive, despite what an awful guy he was. so, during the daytime i'd recall with clarity the bad things and i think, in my instance, that helped me work through it and lose the dreams.
Author Candle037 Posted October 22, 2015 Author Posted October 22, 2015 Thank you that does make sense to put it in immediate perspective that it didn't work.
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