Versacehottie Posted October 18, 2015 Posted October 18, 2015 That is a fair point. When I was single I always felt insecure but for the most part I tried to be aware of that and not blame the other person Well that's the real question. Does the OP want a relationship with a guy that handles things like this IF she could resurrect it? I think both parties need to be sensitive to each other. But his reaction alone would maybe a huge red flag. Sure a guy could be upset, pull back, go a bit quiet, but mini-tantrum and insulting her is not cool. Definitely his ego. I think it's fair enough getting together the first time is a vulnerable time for both usually. Girl wonders if he was just in it for sex and will keep dating her. And a guy wonders if his ability to make her happy in that department and if he has found someone who makes him happy in and out of bedroom and isn't going to go totally clingy on him. That's a very typical scenario, I think. People reveal their personalities though all the time so I'd be concerned if I was OP how he blamed her for the bad sex--um, he was there too, right? I wouldn't necessarily get upset that he pulled back and said he had to go see his brother. I can see good guys doing that as well. He's embarrassed and just doesn't want the night to keep going. He needs time and space to process. Lots of GUYS would do the same thing. So the other real question, is should the OP reach out and would she want to? She's only one who can answer that as she knows his personality and their connection. 1
jam.over.jelly Posted October 18, 2015 Posted October 18, 2015 Well that's the real question. Does the OP want a relationship with a guy that handles things like this IF she could resurrect it? I think both parties need to be sensitive to each other. But his reaction alone would maybe a huge red flag. Sure a guy could be upset, pull back, go a bit quiet, but mini-tantrum and insulting her is not cool. Definitely his ego. I think it's fair enough getting together the first time is a vulnerable time for both usually. Girl wonders if he was just in it for sex and will keep dating her. And a guy wonders if his ability to make her happy in that department and if he has found someone who makes him happy in and out of bedroom and isn't going to go totally clingy on him. That's a very typical scenario, I think. People reveal their personalities though all the time so I'd be concerned if I was OP how he blamed her for the bad sex--um, he was there too, right? I wouldn't necessarily get upset that he pulled back and said he had to go see his brother. I can see good guys doing that as well. He's embarrassed and just doesn't want the night to keep going. He needs time and space to process. Lots of GUYS would do the same thing. So the other real question, is should the OP reach out and would she want to? She's only one who can answer that as she knows his personality and their connection. As much as I want to give this guy the benefit of the doubt, he just doesn't seem like a nice guy. Your insight might be right, however even if he was indeed embarrassed and simply just didn't want the night to continue, he still could have been considerate of her feelings and the fact that they were intimate for the very first time, which put her in a very vulnerable situation. Him sending her home in a very cold manner without any kiss or even hug goodbye screams out to me he doesn't care all that much about her. I still think she is better off without him.
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