Amy77 Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Ok i just started college a few weeks ago and moved in with random people, 2 guys and a girl who i really liked. Monday i went out and stupidly toom some esctasy which didnt agree with me and i felt weird so got a taxi home, as i was in the taxi the effects fully came up and as i got home i went upstairs where the 2 guys are and long story short i basically got into their beds, pulled down their pants, licked them, cried, begged them to have sex with me, ran around the house with no top on only a thong, followed them when they attempted to get away from me and just basically went crazy like that for 2 hours and they were sober . I then got into one of their beds and would not let him sleep until he had sex with me, I haven't seen them since and haven't been home since I've been staying with my friends, I actually can never face them im actually so depressed over it i dont even know what to do, I'm never ever like that usually I was just off my head and now I have ruined my life down here I just want to move out and never ever come back. How can I come back from this, is it possible?
darkbloom Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Amy, As I recall from some of your other posts, you're not a very good drunk and it appears as though you aren't very functional on drugs. You create a lot of your own drama and then ask for advice about it. YOU have to want to change and it starts with not altering your mind with substances that you are not equipped to handle. I would suggest a therapist to help you explain why you behave this way and what you can do to change. Stop this madness 3
lollipopspot Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I then got into one of their beds and would not let him sleep until he had sex with me Did the guy have sex with you? If so, that probably changes my answer.
d0nnivain Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Don't do ecstasy again. Apologize to your house mates. Explain you were on drugs. Promise it won't happen again. Make sure it doesn't. Perhaps stop spending time with the people who were there when you took the drug who then also let you go off by yourself under the influence. You were naked & high. You didn't kill anybody. They will get over it. 3
Author Amy77 Posted October 16, 2015 Author Posted October 16, 2015 Did the guy have sex with you? If so, that probably changes my answer. Ya but he kept saying he couldn't do it because I was so ****ed up but I just kept touching him and begging him for about an hour and eventually he did it, it was my fault
Art_Critic Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 IMO you have bigger problems to deal with than being embarrassed... that time will fix.. Your drug and Alcohol problem should be addressed immediately and either thru treatment of getting yourself some counseling to figure out why you have done this and to figure how to build a help network so you don't keeping abusing Alcohol and Drugs in this manner and more. AA or NA would be a good start... 2
Author Amy77 Posted October 16, 2015 Author Posted October 16, 2015 This was only my second time doing ecstacy and its defiantly my last, I just can't stop thinking about it and I've never been so mortified , I just don't know what to do I really think I should move out they definatley will never forgot about that and it will forever be awkward now 1
lollipopspot Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Ya but he kept saying he couldn't do it because I was so ****ed up but I just kept touching him and begging him for about an hour and eventually he did it, it was my fault O.k. So you were out of your mind and he still had sex with you. This is different to me than just you running around being an idiot on drugs and them observing you make a fool out of yourself. This guy was a participant. He should be embarrassed of himself too for having sex with someone who obviously wasn't thinking clearly. I would say go treatment (go to AA meetings), apologize, and ultimately who the hell cares what they think. If you need to keep living there, that's fine, they'll get over it. You need to take care of yourself so that something even worse doesn't happen. 1
Author Amy77 Posted October 16, 2015 Author Posted October 16, 2015 I hardly think doing esctasy twice in my life and drinking about once a month makes me have a drug problem what the hell lol
lollipopspot Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I hardly think doing esctasy twice in my life and drinking about once a month makes me have a drug problem what the hell lol I didn't look at your past posts, I was taking what the other poster said about your alcohol use. Have you ever done something you regret on alcohol or the other time you did ecstasy?
buck3200 Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 What happened the first time you did it. Did you act like this before.
bubbaganoosh Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Now you know why they call it dope. Look if you have a problem then you need to correct it. If you can't hold your booze then you need to stop drinking. As far as drugs, you know what happened so you can repeat it or stop. It's up to you. I hope you really go and get the help you need. Things like what you did can give you a name you don't want. It's called a statistic and your name is in the obituaries. Please get help. 1
d0nnivain Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I hardly think doing esctasy twice in my life and drinking about once a month makes me have a drug problem what the hell lol It's not the amount of times you engage in the activity. It's how you behave once you do drugs or drink. Your body chemistry means you can't handle it. Because you can't handle it you need to stop, completely & forever. That is not easy to do without support. Hence we all keep recommending that you go to a meeting. 3
autumnnight Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Ya but he kept saying he couldn't do it because I was so ****ed up but I just kept touching him and begging him for about an hour and eventually he did it, it was my fault I am sorry you went through this, but I admire you for being honest and seeing it like it is. Some women would still consider this rape....and it AIN'T
autumnnight Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I hardly think doing esctasy twice in my life and drinking about once a month makes me have a drug problem what the hell lol There IS a type of alcoholic called a binge drinker. They may not drink often, but when they do, it all goes to heck in a handbasket. Considering this thread, I wouldn't be minimizing the problem. 1
RecentChange Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 OP - this is some very concerning behavior. Did he use protection? Were you so out of it that you would know or not? Any chance of pregnancy? Look, I partied, and did a lot of drugs in college. I NEVER lost control /got as wasted as you describe. Time to step away from the booze and drugs - unless you want to ruin your reputation, health, and quite possibly future.
Author Amy77 Posted October 16, 2015 Author Posted October 16, 2015 OP - this is some very concerning behavior. Did he use protection? Were you so out of it that you would know or not? Any chance of pregnancy? Look, I partied, and did a lot of drugs in college. I NEVER lost control /got as wasted as you describe. Time to step away from the booze and drugs - unless you want to ruin your reputation, health, and quite possibly future. I don't know if he used a condom or not and if he didn't yes there is a chance of pregnancy , I dont know what happened me I never acted like that before, what should I do how will I face them again?
lollipopspot Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I don't know if he used a condom or not and if he didn't yes there is a chance of pregnancy , I dont know what happened me I never acted like that before, what should I do how will I face them again? Who cares what they think? They're a blip in your life. The one guy was a sober participant in your "downfall" so especially you shouldn't care about what that guy thinks. He got something out of it, maybe he's even hoping you do it again. Just take care of yourself and don't worry about them - it's not like they took care of you. 1
d0nnivain Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I don't know if he used a condom or not and if he didn't yes there is a chance of pregnancy , I dont know what happened me I never acted like that before, what should I do how will I face them again? Talk to him privately. Apologize. Explain about the drugs. Ask about the condom. As for the other housemates, again apologize. Explain about the drugs. Maybe do something nice for all of them like make dinner. Seriously consider getting help. At the very least stay away from alcohol & drugs. Your good behavior going forward will make this a (somewhat) funny story as time passes. 1
lollipopspot Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Explain about the drugs. I'm pretty sure they knew she was on drugs. 3
Art_Critic Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I hardly think doing esctasy twice in my life and drinking about once a month makes me have a drug problem what the hell lol Have you read the opening post of this thread you posted ? you obviously have a drug problem, you say you aren't going to do it again but you will.. you need to get yourself some help. You are not someone who can take drugs or alcohol, it affects you differently than most people.. I would also remind you that you are just 21.. a young pup in the eyes of substance abuse, do you want 10 more years of waking up and sleeping with random men you don't even know ? 3
RecentChange Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 And you didn't go and get Plan B the next day? So what are you going to do if you are pregnant? This is why you can't do drugs OP - they can be unpredictable (especially things like E - botblike there is quality control!), and the consequences of doing stupid shhhit, or damage to your health are very very real.
d0nnivain Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 I'm pretty sure they knew she was on drugs. I would hope but . . . I think her saying it out loud may help the OP understand why this is a problem. Amy I also think lollipopspot is correct. Don't go too crazy on the apologizes. Because they did take advantage of you in your vulnerable state. You had diminished capacity & none of your housemates acted in your best interests under the circumstances. The guy in Q could have fended you off, or called you an ambulance. Be leery of calling these people "your friends". Same goes for the people who let you drop E then leave alone. 2
lollipopspot Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 OP, you know what they call the "walk of shame?" You have to just do it. That's how you face them again. Go in, head held high. Say you had a problem, and you're dealing with it. It won't be happening again. Talk to the one guy privately about condoms. Don't trust that these guys are your friends or looking out for you - they're not. Most importantly deal with taking care of yourself, because these people won't be there to help you or take care of you, they've already shown that. 1
Gloria25 Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Uh, I would start with going cold turkey on drugs and alcohol...even if that would require me to seek inpatient treatment (i.e. a treatment center, away from the world where I wouldn't have access to drugs and can concentrate on counseling and working on myself). I'd also seek counseling as to why I'm into such self-destructive and reckless behavior...
Recommended Posts