Tiggercat88 Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Oh man where to start! Back in July by boyfriend of 1.5yrs told me, 2 days before I was to leave on vacation, that he could not handle another long term relationship. His two previous ones lasted 5 and 3 years with not much time between them. He made a point to say that it was nothing to do with me, that he knew his friends would say he made a mistake (which they did) but right now he had to figure out some internal issues, sort his life out and be independent for now. He said I was the best thing to happen to him and knows how awesome I am. I understand the need to be single for a while, I've been there. It's hard to accept when you're told that you're amazing but someone you love so deeply doesn't want to be with you. Flash forward a month and I texted him good luck at his band's show. He responded right away, saying it was nice to hear from me and wanted to meet up. I said no at first but eventually said yes. Needless to say, he wanted to get back together. Lucky me, a week later he broke down and again, broke things off. Flash forward another couple of weeks, we're talking again. We hung out once with no intimate contact, just had coffee and hung out. We were to have plans to meet up when I get a text saying that he really needs to get over me/I'm a hard girl to stop seeing/needs more space. Fine. I had no expectations from our meet ups but sounds like he thought I did. I didn't talk to him for three weeks and again, my urge to be nice and wish him luck again for a show sent him a good luck text. Again he responded similar to last time, good to hear from me/thanks for giving him space/was going to text me later in the week. Now I don't think much of it, so I along with the convo and it's so damn easy with him. Then out of the blue I ask what he was going to text me (which he dint know yet) and I responded with something like well from the text I got 3 weeks ago it sounded like you were done with me. His reply: 'not what I said/meant, just wanted space. I don't want to get into it right now' Which is fair because we only just started talking, and now I feel like I screwed up even a friendship with him. This guy, I love and hate. I want to be in his life and he wants to be in mine but he's in no way ready for a relationship. He's said that he's only on dating sites to distract himself. He still cares for me, and I him and only want the best but have a hard time accepting what's going on. We were amazing together it's timing that had broken us up. I've never experienced this and would love any input.
Strength in Healing Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 He's said that he's only on dating sites to distract himself. He still cares for me, and I him and only want the best but have a hard time accepting what's going on. We were amazing together it's timing that had broken us up. I've never experienced this and would love any input. This guy is lying heavily and using you when he's down and/or until he finds someone he views as better. You aren't a priority, and timing didn't break you up, because that's not an issue anymore. Respect yourself and cut him out. Though, unfortunately, so few times do people have the strength to do that. Most people will keep picking at their scabs until they're permanently scarred (aka keep talking to their exes), and the scar is all they end up having to show for it all. Do you like scars?
singme2sleep Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 Guys suck. Relationships suck. Love sucks. 1
stillafool Posted October 16, 2015 Posted October 16, 2015 If you are done with him (or he wants his space) stop contacting him to wish him luck which translates to him that you want him. It sounds like he is only seeing you for sex because you keep contacting him so why not. Go NC until he reaches out to you to ask for a date. Otherwise you are just hanging on to him while pretending to let him go.
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