marychapman Posted October 15, 2015 Posted October 15, 2015 He`s driving me crazy. I want him. I can`t have him. Why do we want what we can`t have.
Ic1 Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 'Grass is greener on the other side' effect. Once you get some life lessons down, you learn what you really want.
Michelle ma Belle Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 Vanity. I’m not talking about the, “Don’t I look amazing in this sparkly dress?” type of vanity. I mean the type of vanity that pertains to one’s own self-image and is intrinsically tied to our senses of self-worth. We, as humans, are vain by our very nature. We all like to feel special, attractive and important, as these are all things that pump up our pride, confidence and self-image. Nobody wants to feel powerless, unattractive or unable to affect people. The same is true of carrying a burning desire for that certain person you cannot win over. The fact that you want him or her but can’t have him or her is a blow to your personal vanity. With personal vanity wounded, your mind will try to get your own sense of self-worth back up to what it was. It does this by pushing you to obtain the thing that did the damage in the first place, which, in this case, is that person you can’t have. Chasing this person more aggressively will most likely push him or her even farther away from you, wounding personal vanity further and making you want him or her even more.
smackie9 Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 It's dopamine to blame. It's the same reason why women can't shake an abuser. Being rejected or the unattainable releases dopamine.....that feel good chemical.
frus69 Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 Why/how is he unattainable? He is definitely taken
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