thejabberwocky Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 I'm 6 days away from my 60 day NC mark... and honestly, I thought I'd feel better by now. I don't miss him, but it's more that I'm just in a total state of depression. I think the glass shattered on who I thought he was and I'm angry that I was tricked into believing he was one person when he was living a double life. I am still grieving and still angry. I've had his number and social media blocked since the day I broke it off, because I was hoping for some emotional clarity before I was ready to discuss it. I feel like he conned me into our relationship. For those who haven't read my previous posts, we were together for 6 years. Around this time last year, I discovered he had a serious drug problem. I was devastated but he got sober and then we got back together. I thought it was a blip on the radar. Then I discovered that he was lying to me about a few things (two months ago) and I broke up with him because I felt that I would never be able to trust him again, especially since I still was worried he would relapse after his drug issue last year. I want to talk to him and get an explanation of how he could once again lie to me after I tried so hard to support him after his drug problem. But would it even matter? Should I unblock his number after my 60 day mark? Would his explanation even make me feel better? Or an apology? I don't know but I still feel awful.
Seth0194 Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 No let go, I know its hard to do when you emotionally invested so long into some one who $#it on you, but openning things up again will not give you closer, we seldom get that. You run the risk of more damage. If you want to get "even" live your life, make youself happy and let him fade into your past. Learn from this and grow. Best of luck.
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