Moonwalker1982 Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 I don't want to make a whole wall of text, so let's get to it. Last week i went to the pet doctor with my dog, the lady that helped me, a pet doctor at that....well let's just say she was very friendly, seemed like a sweet person too and i just instantly liked her. I had to go back there later in the week and when i left i thought to myself....i need to do something about this. When i go there next thursday with my dog there won't be a lot of time for small talk or any of that. I DO have a feeling it's mutual, but i have had those impressions/thoughts before and turned out to be false. I have nothing to lose, but i do want to make a good first impression. Basically i'd like to see if some people here can give me some nice examples of things to say, you know...just some advice. Who knows, it might help me out greatly.
BlackMinx Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 First of all, look your best when you go. First impressions happen before you even open your mouth. Groom well, dress well, and generally look good. It can't hurt. Second of all, make sure she isn't already taken. Third, start out by complimenting her...don't say something crude like "nice legs", but something nice like "I know that I barely know you, but I couldn't help but notice how intelligent and bright and kind you seem. Would you like to have coffee with me one day when you're available?" Say something simple, don't overdo it...at least that's my advice. If she doesn't take the bait, she wasn't really interested in the first place; most women jump at the opportunity to go out with a guy they've been eyeing, no matter how cheesy his pick-up line is (as long as it's not insulting or atrocious). Good luck. 2
Author Moonwalker1982 Posted October 11, 2015 Author Posted October 11, 2015 (edited) First of all, look your best when you go. First impressions happen before you even open your mouth. Groom well, dress well, and generally look good. It can't hurt. Second of all, make sure she isn't already taken. Third, start out by complimenting her...don't say something crude like "nice legs", but something nice like "I know that I barely know you, but I couldn't help but notice how intelligent and bright and kind you seem. Would you like to have coffee with me one day when you're available?" Say something simple, don't overdo it...at least that's my advice. If she doesn't take the bait, she wasn't really interested in the first place; most women jump at the opportunity to go out with a guy they've been eyeing, no matter how cheesy his pick-up line is (as long as it's not insulting or atrocious). Good luck. You know what, that is actually some really nice advice. Seriously. It's brief but to the point and exactly what i am trying to say. It's typically me to actually make a big deal out ouf things that aren't even a thing yet, it happened several times that i was going to ask a woman out and i just ended up not bothering at all, greeting her and all that but not what asking her for a drink. I am the kind of person that keeps dwelling on things, but really that's just a big waste of time. If i 'deliver' it like that, i'll find out right away if she was indeed interested too, or not at all. Thank you. You know..with that first and last part you can actually do alot with that. For example i could also say ''I know i barely know you, but you seem like a real nice lady that i'd like to get to know better. Could i buy you some coffee someday when you are available?'' You seriously helped me out a lot with that reply. For many people i'm sure it's nothing and they think nothing of it, but i do. Cause like i said...i always make a too big a deal of things, overthinking things (which i am sure it seems i am doing now too, but i am not, honestly, haha) and end up not doing anything at all, when it's really all so simple. Edited October 11, 2015 by Moonwalker1982 1
xcupid Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 I'd compliment her on her skill handling and caring for your dog. Good ice breaker. And tell her how much you appreciate her help. Good luck.
seekingluck Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 After you've made pleasantries about your dog say "I'd love to get to know you better, do you want to meet for a drink/lunch/coffee/dinner/pick your poison."
Maggie4 Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 Some vet appointments can be rushed and you may not have a lot of time to chat. If that happens, you need to just get right to the point. 1
Popsicle Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 Yes, please do ask her out. You can also help break up the formalness by prefacing it with something like "I know this may seem a bit awkward to be asking you this here, but I can't think of another time I'd see you", then ask her out. Be sure to leave your email address on or in your dogs file, just in case she is so taken off guard that she blurts out no just to appear professional, but later regrets it and changes her mind. She will contact you then. You would be SURPRISED at how many people blurt out no out of nervousness/uncomfortableness/awkwardness, but really do like you and want to go out with you. They will come back to you later after they've calmed. 1
Popsicle Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 I know so many beautiful female professionals who never get asked out. Like never ever. Everyone is too intimidated and they don't get out a whole lot. They end up either hopelessly single/lonely, or with some loser jackass who treats her like crap, but was the only one who had the guts to pursue her.
TheBathWater Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 Basically i'd like to see if some people here can give me some nice examples of things to say, you know...just some advice. Who knows, it might help me out greatly. I never read anyone else's comments when responding to a post, so you are getting unadulterated advice here... Walk up to her and state your feelings with confidence and honesty, just like you did to us here: "Hey, I noticed you last time I was here. You are really cute. Come out with me (big smile)." If she says anything other than yes, you say "I understand, and you're still invited (big smile)." Women are attracted to confidence and honesty, and will never be offended by your desire as long as it is not presumptuous. If nothing else, you should do this because it feels good to do as a man. 1
Author Moonwalker1982 Posted October 12, 2015 Author Posted October 12, 2015 Yes, please do ask her out. You can also help break up the formalness by prefacing it with something like "I know this may seem a bit awkward to be asking you this here, but I can't think of another time I'd see you", then ask her out. Be sure to leave your email address on or in your dogs file, just in case she is so taken off guard that she blurts out no just to appear professional, but later regrets it and changes her mind. She will contact you then. You would be SURPRISED at how many people blurt out no out of nervousness/uncomfortableness/awkwardness, but really do like you and want to go out with you. They will come back to you later after they've calmed. I've been for at least two years at this vet and in the file of my dog there's my email address and phonenumber. But i don't think she knows my name and i am not sure if she remember my dog's name. Is it an idea to leave a note with my email address or phonenumber on it and hand it to her, even if she says no? Just in case? I never read anyone else's comments when responding to a post, so you are getting unadulterated advice here... Walk up to her and state your feelings with confidence and honesty, just like you did to us here: "Hey, I noticed you last time I was here. You are really cute. Come out with me (big smile)." If she says anything other than yes, you say "I understand, and you're still invited (big smile)." Women are attracted to confidence and honesty, and will never be offended by your desire as long as it is not presumptuous. If nothing else, you should do this because it feels good to do as a man. For all my life for some reason i've always thought it was a bit too much to state my thoughts or compliment in ways like that. I guess i have been a bit too humble all that time. It's definitely good advice about the big smile, i don't want to exeggerate it though and it should always be me, i don't want to appear like i'm someone else. But you are right, women like compliments, hell pretty much any person likes to be complimented.
glynnroy Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 First thing Look smart , smell good , be polite ! The easier way is to 1. Say hello, how you been , make small talk , even throw in a cheesy joke like , he's not feeling as ruff today boom boom 2. Look for a ring , is she a miss or Mrs 3. This is the bit where you got to have some balls , remember the saying , regret the things you do rather than those you don't Just be honest and say , Look I was just wondrying if you had a boyfriend , as if you don't I'd like to take you out for a drink , I don't normally do this so I feel a little bit embarrassed, but I thought I'd at least try She will be flattered , either way you will get a reply ! Good luck
Author Moonwalker1982 Posted October 12, 2015 Author Posted October 12, 2015 (edited) First thing Look smart , smell good , be polite ! The easier way is to 1. Say hello, how you been , make small talk , even throw in a cheesy joke like , he's not feeling as ruff today boom boom 2. Look for a ring , is she a miss or Mrs 3. This is the bit where you got to have some balls , remember the saying , regret the things you do rather than those you don't Just be honest and say , Look I was just wondrying if you had a boyfriend , as if you don't I'd like to take you out for a drink , I don't normally do this so I feel a little bit embarrassed, but I thought I'd at least try She will be flattered , either way you will get a reply ! Good luck Good point on the ring yeah, usually a ring means she's taken. Not always though, cause i know a few women who just like to wear rings. I am not too good with this, but is it always a certain finger if she's married or not? Simply asking how she's doing is quite good too, how the hell am i not thinking of those things? Wow. I really need to work on that, damn. It's the things people don't expect that they like, i don't think many guys walk in there and simply asking how SHE is doing instead of talking about the pet right away. Come to think of it, the two times i went there she directly asked how my dog was doing, so i can answer that and then direct the question at her. She'll no doubt be surprised at that...and from there i can throw in some (well meant) compliments. Edited October 12, 2015 by Moonwalker1982
glynnroy Posted October 12, 2015 Posted October 12, 2015 Good point on the ring yeah, usually a ring means she's taken. Not always though, cause i know a few women who just like to wear rings. I am not too good with this, but is it always a certain finger if she's married or not? Simply asking how she's doing is quite good too, how the hell am i not thinking of those things? Wow. I really need to work on that, damn. It's the things people don't expect that they like, i don't think many guys walk in there and simply asking how SHE is doing instead of talking about the pet right away. Come to think of it, the two times i went there she directly asked how my dog was doing, so i can answer that and then direct the question at her. She'll no doubt be surprised at that...and from there i can throw in some (well meant) compliments. Don't over do it with the compliments mate ! Other wise you might even freak her out Little steps How you doing Have you been busy I'm here that often I'm nearly part of the furniture Have you got any pets Are you on face book Will he live Same again next week I like it in here I might have to come again Do you get out much I think my dog likes you he wants to see you again Can we make this a weekly thing Do I get a voucher as I've been here twice now The list is endless Be nice Be polite Don't freak her out
Author Moonwalker1982 Posted October 12, 2015 Author Posted October 12, 2015 Don't over do it with the compliments mate ! Other wise you might even freak her out Little steps How you doing Have you been busy I'm here that often I'm nearly part of the furniture Have you got any pets Are you on face book Will he live Same again next week I like it in here I might have to come again Do you get out much I think my dog likes you he wants to see you again Can we make this a weekly thing Do I get a voucher as I've been here twice now The list is endless Be nice Be polite Don't freak her out Ah yes, all really good things for sure,but the thing is i usually only go there once per three months for the medicines for my dog. But my dog has something else now that requires me to come back this thursday too. But upcoming thursday could be the last time i have to go there and after that i'll go back three months later for the meds again. So i have to make the invitation this week.
Author Moonwalker1982 Posted November 24, 2015 Author Posted November 24, 2015 Hey guys, I finally asked her out today. It took a while, but better late than never. I'll explain. So i was there today and we had a little talk, it was much nicer than usual in terms of us talking. And then when the time was right i asked if she wanted to go for a drink with me sometime. She replied that she couldn't because she was going on vacation for three weeks. So i said that's ok, maybe after that? And right after that i asked if she perhaps already had someone, usually i don't do that....but i did this time. She said she didn't have one, but that she was on a internship in this town at the vet and that this was her last day. She said she lived in another town and that's a train trip of two hours from here. Far from ideal. I then said, ah that's too bad and i just thanked her and said goodbye and wished her a nice vacation and left. Now i don't know if i handled things the right way. On one hand i am very happy i finally asked her out, i finally crossed that bridge and this should make it easier in the future and i'm good with this, because the distance isn't exactly short. Plus a friend said distant relationships (if it was going to turn into one) are never really ideal. On the other hand i am thinking i should have said...hmmm that's quite the distance, but maybe i can come over there after a few weeks, we'll eat or drink something, see how it goes? Especially because i go towards there several times a year when i go hang out with my friends. but at the same time i am like...she could have offered this herself to me. Maybe the interest wasn't mutual , but it really could be anything. Another friend of mine said distance should not matter when you like someone...this is now making me wonder if i should call the vet's place, ask for her on the phone and still offer to come to her town in a few weeks. I don't want to come off as desperate though. But i am not gonna deny i feel bad about this.
shoplocal Posted November 28, 2015 Posted November 28, 2015 Hey guys, I finally asked her out today. It took a while, but better late than never. I'll explain. So i was there today and we had a little talk, it was much nicer than usual in terms of us talking. And then when the time was right i asked if she wanted to go for a drink with me sometime. She replied that she couldn't because she was going on vacation for three weeks. So i said that's ok, maybe after that? And right after that i asked if she perhaps already had someone, usually i don't do that....but i did this time. She said she didn't have one, but that she was on a internship in this town at the vet and that this was her last day. She said she lived in another town and that's a train trip of two hours from here. Far from ideal. I then said, ah that's too bad and i just thanked her and said goodbye and wished her a nice vacation and left. Now i don't know if i handled things the right way. On one hand i am very happy i finally asked her out, i finally crossed that bridge and this should make it easier in the future and i'm good with this, because the distance isn't exactly short. Plus a friend said distant relationships (if it was going to turn into one) are never really ideal. On the other hand i am thinking i should have said...hmmm that's quite the distance, but maybe i can come over there after a few weeks, we'll eat or drink something, see how it goes? Especially because i go towards there several times a year when i go hang out with my friends. but at the same time i am like...she could have offered this herself to me. Maybe the interest wasn't mutual , but it really could be anything. Another friend of mine said distance should not matter when you like someone...this is now making me wonder if i should call the vet's place, ask for her on the phone and still offer to come to her town in a few weeks. I don't want to come off as desperate though. But i am not gonna deny i feel bad about this. Ahhhh! You did awesome! Congrats! Personally, I think you don't need to do anything else. You're absolutely right, if someone is interested in you they'll be solution-oriented when it comes to making plans to meet up. It does suck that she wasn't so interested, but more importantly you went for what you wanted: that sends a powerful message to your self-confidence.
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