cwtchycoo Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 So back last November I started to casually date a guy I met OLD. The first date was good and he was so eager to see me again that we planned to go on another date the day after. We dated up until January. Went out for dinner, went to the cinema, went for drinks and also watched movies at mine or his place. Then when I came back for Christmas from my hometown, things seemed to have changed. He seemed to back off a little... I wasn't too bothered as at this point in my first year of nurse training I had a lot of exams and I was starting to dedicate most of my time to studying. Didn't hear from him until March, where he sent me a long message apologising for not being in touch. He said he was scared things were starting to get serious (wasn't sure why he'd felt that way but I guess three months of dating he got cold feet) and said he felt like an idiot, but wished me all the best. At this point I was already starting to date someone else, and had a lot of preparation for my clinical placements so I thanked him for his message and wished him the same. Soooo today out of the blue, this guy messages me, says it is him (saved some awkwardness as I didn't have his number anymore) and he asked if I'd come back to the city from summer holiday. I said yes, and asked how he was. He then asked if I'd like to meet up for a drink this week, and he'd been meaning to ask me sooner but guessed I'd have been back in my hometown for summer. I've agreed to meet him, only available on Tuesday this week which he was happy with. I'm just a bit like ???? And I don't have any bad instincts which I rely on, but I am starting to become a little wary of dating. He was a very nice guy, sort of quiet but we opened up to each other easily and he used to help me with my maths work and we'd actually have a really good laugh together. Bit of background, I've recently had a terrible experience with a guy a decade older than me. I feel ready to date again but... I really want to date the right guy. Do you think I should give it a go or is he just coming back because he's bored maybe? Or maybe he's uh... Got warmer feet? Obviously no one has all the answers here but I'd like to hear all your thoughts!
Terry8889 Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 I just saw a thread similar to this, anyways, I think he was dating other women at the same time he was talking to you. Now that those didn't work out for him, he is coming back to you. You are kind of his backup plan. OR he was actually afraid of things getting serious. If you like someone a lot, and things are going great, why would you get scared of commitment? Either scenario doesn't sound good. If you decide to give it another try do not keep your hopes up with him, and also date other men in the mean time.
Author cwtchycoo Posted October 11, 2015 Author Posted October 11, 2015 I just saw a thread similar to this, anyways, I think he was dating other women at the same time he was talking to you. Now that those didn't work out for him, he is coming back to you. You are kind of his backup plan. OR he was actually afraid of things getting serious. If you like someone a lot, and things are going great, why would you get scared of commitment? Either scenario doesn't sound good. If you decide to give it another try do not keep your hopes up with him, and also date other men in the mean time. Yeah my hopes aren't that high up, and I have another date arranged this week with someone else. Just kind of confuses me you know! I'm much better than a back up plan haha. I may just see how it goes but if I'm getting that vibe I'm not going with it, especially if it's "just sex". I've moved on from that. 1
Zippy2000 Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 I just saw a thread similar to this, anyways, I think he was dating other women at the same time he was talking to you. Now that those didn't work out for him, he is coming back to you. You are kind of his backup plan. OR he was actually afraid of things getting serious. If you like someone a lot, and things are going great, why would you get scared of commitment? Either scenario doesn't sound good. If you decide to give it another try do not keep your hopes up with him, and also date other men in the mean time. I totally agree with this. If someone likes you enough. They will want to be in your life. The fact he disappears is he`s been "busy". Busy dating or pursing other women. Since his options have dried up. Hes come sniffing back. Either that he was unsure what he was looking for and changed his mind and remembered you were there and now wants to try again.
todreaminblue Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 things change people change.......he didnt forget you .....for whatever reason....he is back and asking to date you......why dont you take it with a come what may......dont put your heart on your sleeve but be open and honest with him how you feel about him coming back...you already have other dates lined up with other men.....so you arent really tying yourself to him just yet.... just see how things go with this guy who came back.....and then follow your heart......deb 1
xcupid Posted October 11, 2015 Posted October 11, 2015 Keep an open mind but be wary. Find out why the "change of heart" all of a sudden. Red flag that he disappeared in the first place. Red flag that he contacts you a year later.
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