Author Hughes101 Posted November 29, 2015 Author Posted November 29, 2015 Re-read the post you made. Then pretend it was your best friend saying it. What would your response be? My first thought would be "mate, why are you even still with this girl". The answer is that she had seemed like the perfect girlfriend from the beginning. Idolising me, telling me I'm perfect and she's so lucky to have me. Always waiting for me at home so she's there when i get there. Her lack of boundaries extents into the bedroom and it's some of the best sex I've ever had (but only when i got emotionally invested). She just had a way of getting under my skin. Last night when i reacted to her msging this guy again to prove that it was a platonic freindship she started picking her toenails. To the point that they were bleeding, there was blood on her fingers and legs. She later admitted that she used to self harm which after some research makes it look like she is definitely bpd as was suggested by Sean Connery (can't remember username)earlier in the thread.
AspenBaldwin Posted November 29, 2015 Posted November 29, 2015 4 months? Longest PMS I've ever heard of.
Author Hughes101 Posted November 29, 2015 Author Posted November 29, 2015 I have now properly broken up with her. I also told her that i don't want us going into each other's rooms and making up, and that one of us is going to have to leave. She said she is going to. Her first reaction was anger with crying. She started punching the walls and couldn't believe that after all she had done for me i was breaking up. A very fitting thunder storm started a few minutes after i delivered this news. She dramatically grabbed her bag and headed into the rain. I told her she doesn't have to leave now and this is ridiculous.. she was standing in the rain waiting for me to come and grab her (it wasn't enough that i just didn't want to see her in the rain). Feel like it was a good opportunity to get out of this and i kind of feel relieved. I think she will probably come back later tonight because all her stuff is still here. No idea where she is but i think she's trying to use that to get me to contact her which i won't.
joseb Posted November 29, 2015 Posted November 29, 2015 My first thought would be "mate, why are you even still with this girl". The answer is that she had seemed like the perfect girlfriend from the beginning. Idolising me, telling me I'm perfect and she's so lucky to have me. Always waiting for me at home so she's there when i get there. Her lack of boundaries extents into the bedroom and it's some of the best sex I've ever had (but only when i got emotionally invested). She just had a way of getting under my skin. She later admitted that she used to self harm which after some research makes it look like she is definitely bpd as was suggested by Sean Connery (can't remember username)earlier in the thread. That would be me! Yeah the idolising at the start, the wild sex, and the self harm are all more indicators of bpd (not all self harm but a highish percentage) You are doing the right thing. But be prepared for a lot more drama (attempts at make up sex. Etc) before its over.
Author Hughes101 Posted December 8, 2015 Author Posted December 8, 2015 I moved her out 2 days ago (literally, "helping" her to move). As i was driving her to the new place i saw a text come through from her big ticket orbiter/emotional tampon asking if shes ok. I've come to learn this guy is an unsavory character- cheats on his gf "all the time", can be found in the pub drinking at any given night. I felt sorry for her that this was a key part of her support network.. and that the main reason that he was available to her was that she has been using her sexuality as leverage. I could be wrong but I'm normally a pretty good judge of character and pretty loyal myself (sometimes to the point of being subservient ). It's sad. Sad that it ended and sad that I'm now jaded after a bad relationship. The big positive from this is its a new beginning for me. I've banged on for too long now.. main thing was seem to have got out in not too bad form.
IronZ Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Today gf showed me a msg she sent to the guy that she was msging and flirting with. . Basically asking if his intentions were ever to get with her. . Of course he said no. This pissed me of big time because A. It's between me and her. I thought her actions were innapropriate. What the guys intentions were are irrelevant. B. In a roundabout way she had declared to a guy who likes her that we're having relationship problems and brought him back into the picture. C. Wtf did she expect him to say "yes he was right, i wanted to bang you all along". He's not going to do anything stupid. D. It was drama seeking. E. Lack of respect for taking this stuff outside the relationship to someone of opposite sex. F. Like something from school dayz. Another argument. That first point that you made that I highlighted is spot on. I don't remember where I read this the other day but it was something along the lines of (from a woman's perspective) "if I trust you to go to another woman's place it's because I trust you not to do anything. It doesn't matter if she tries to kiss you because I know you won't kiss her back. Her trying to sleep with you doesn't mean you have to sleep back". It was something like that.. basically highlighting the fact that a good relationship isn't about what the third party tries to do or what their intentions are. A good honorable person will not let that affect them in any way. I think her showing you that message was so dumb because you simply don't know what they could've discussed offline and away from your eyes and ears. It doesn't prove anything and she really shouldn't have to prove anything. There's no trust anymore. You don't believe anything she's saying. She could be innocent for all we know but it won't make you feel any different. Just let this one go.
Recommended Posts