Revan32 Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 Normal Person just posted this in another thread. Are you successful? Different? Unique? Interesting? Exciting? Funny? What is it about you that you're expecting these women to be so attracted to? Or are you just another face in the crowd? A hot girl can be with pretty much any guy she wants so if you're in the market for her you're going to have to pay a premium for her with some aspect of you that's equally as desirable. What is it? If you don't have anything, then that's the answer to all your questions here. Its a really good post, but what exactly does all that entail? What exciting things do guys do that turn you on personally? What have any of your ex's done that you thought was really hot?
Buddhist Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 Normal Person just posted this in another thread. Its a really good post, but what exactly does all that entail? What exciting things do guys do that turn you on personally? What have any of your ex's done that you thought was really hot? I was desperately in love with my ex. What did he do? He didn't play into typical male stereotypes. There was no PUA, macho bull**** with him. Others called him feminine, I called him hot. It's a pity things didn't turn permanent there, but he was so young and life called him away. 2
thecrucible Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 I don't think guys should ever be rude or blunt or say inappropriate things but I find it really refreshing when a guy cuts the bull**** and just says how he feels so you don't have to do the guessing. I like having deep conversations when the time is right as I like the idea of knowing a guy on a deeper level. I fell in love with a guy once after we stayed up all night talking and watching the world go by. I like a guy who is comfortable with himself and never apologises for who he is but owns up to his faults and doesn't care for perfecting this image of the 'nice guy'. I like guys who are thoughtful and help me out with little things because that is who they are, not because they expect something out of it. I like guys who are interested in learning about the world by traveling, educating themselves and immersing themselves in new cultures. I like guys who are interested in people but have an introverted side and aren't too outgoing but not shy either. I like it too if they get on with everyone they meet, especially children as I adore children and want to have kids one day. I like guys who like sex and are open-minded about experimenting in the bedroom and don't just want to do boring missionary all the time. I also can't stand guys who want to see women as all innocent and untarnished as I don't feel ashamed of my sexuality. Am I too picky? 2
losangelena Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 Attraction is such a nebulous concept; I mean, everyone has a different concept of what that is. A lazy answer would be "money" or "looks" or "good career." I don't think so, though, because I've met plenty of well-off, good-looking, upwardly-mobile people who did nothing for me or who had downright sh*tty personalities. When I think of traits that I find attractive in men, they include: funny intelligent kind empathetic a little self-effacing (no macho ego thing) curious spontaneous thoughtful stylish Unattractive traits would include: meanness bitterness/entitlement/resentment bad temper arrogance pettiness flakiness Those things, to me, are like base-level attractiveness things. Being attracted is not the same as having long-term potential, though. Other factors come into play at that point like: life orientation (What are his politics, religious, social values, etc.) employment (Notice I didn't say money; I'm just curious if the guy can hold down a job.) intellectual engagement (Does he pursue hobbies and/or passions? Does he get stuff done?) relationship history (Has he been married/have kids? What about a clinging ex?) compatibility (Do we have similar interests, lifestyle, sense of humor, taste in food?) maturity (Does he want a relationship? Can he connect on a deeper level?) reliability (Should be obvious) Looks/status/money/power are all at the bottom of my list. To me these can be fleeting and superficial. Even then, someone can meet all of those things and still not interest me, or be lacking several of them and be super-attractive. Go figure. 2
oberkeat Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 Normal Person just posted this in another thread. Its a really good post, but what exactly does all that entail? What exciting things do guys do that turn you on personally? What have any of your ex's done that you thought was really hot? This sounds like a variation of the question, "what does a woman want?" If you asked that question to ten different women, you'd get at least 11 different answers. The answer is that different women are attracted to different things. There is no universal female perspective about what makes a guy amazing and attractive. I see women with guys who I would describe as frankly dull and I ask myself what it is they see him. All we can do is be the best version of ourselves that we can be and keep looking until we find one woman who likes what it is that we have to offer. This issue about what makes a guy worthwhile is pointless. 1
Author Revan32 Posted October 6, 2015 Author Posted October 6, 2015 This sounds like a variation of the question, "what does a woman want?" Yeah I think I phrased it wrong. I was really talking about things like hobbies and stuff that guys can easily work on to become more attractive. Like playing guitar or mountain climbing. lol
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