audreydash Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 Apologies in advance if this is a little long, but i have no idea what to do in this situation and need some outsiders advice. Me and my friend Jen have been best friends since we were 8, and we are now both 19. She dated a guy, Corey when she was 13 for about a year and a half, they were on and off, fought all the time, it was a high school relationship and she cheated on him and they broke up. When me and Jen were 16, we had a huge blowout over dumb drama and stopped being friends for about 3 years, she moved away and we didnt talk anymore. During this time, I hungout with Corey all the time because we were all in the same group of friends. i started having a small crush on corey but didnt say anything because i wasnt ready for a relationship, as id just gotten out of a bad one. She came back a few months ago after we turned 19, and we became friends again and just picked up where we left off, we hungout with Corey and his friends all the time. Jen started developing feelings for Corey again, and twice over the summer when we all hungout they got completly wasted and ended up sleeping together. Jens been obsessing over him, saying shes in love with him again and can see herself marrying this guy, but Corey isn't interested in all, he told me that he doesn't like her at all and shouldnt have slept with her and he was just drunk and he completly regrets it and has no feelings for her. I tried to gently tell Jen she should stop liking corey because i didnt think it was going to go anywhere, they never hungout alone or talked to each other unless we were all drinking together. Anyways, so me and jen were drinking with corey and his friends and jen left before me, everyone ended up falling asleep and me and corey stayed up all night talking about everything, life, dreams, just everything. and then he kissed me, we started making out at first and then i freaked out and realized what was happening and left. i called jen and told her what happened and that we had kissed and apologized like crazier. We didnt talk for a few days then things went back to normal. She forgave me and we went back to hanging out basically everyday. but jen, corey, and our friends stopped hanging out all together. Corey doesnt like jen, but jen loves corey and doesnt want to hangout with us togetyher because she feels awakward with what happened. Corey and jen havent talked at all, but me and corey have talked a lot still and i told him it meant nothing and we could still be friends, because were close friends i dont want to lose him as a friend. jen is absolutely livid at me for even talking to him at all, shes guilt tripping me and now shes completly ignoring me because i kept talking to Corey, she thinks he likes me but i dont think he does. i kinda like him too and we get along so great and are awesome friends, but i know nothing can happen of it because it would upset jen. But now she won't even talk to me. i dont feel like she has the right to tell me who i can and cant talk to, because me and corey were friends when me and her werent even. Should i stop talking to him and let our friendship go? Or should i hope that jen gets over this???
Buddhist Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 Apologies in advance if this is a little long, but i have no idea what to do in this situation and need some outsiders advice. Realise that this is high school drama and no matter how important it feels right now, it really is of no consequence. Forget about this Corey guy and find someone who won't cause drama in your friendship. 2
salparadise Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 Realise that this is high school drama and no matter how important it feels right now, it really is of no consequence. Forget about this Corey guy and find someone who won't cause drama in your friendship. I don't know... I'm seeing it a different way. Jen is the one who's running hot and cold, and all because she's being possessive over Corey when she has no place to be. It would be nice if you could all just get along, but that's not happening and it's because of Jen, not Corey. If Jen and Corey had actually been in a relationship it might be different. She casually banged the guy; that doesn't take him off the market as a friend, a person you're allowed to talk to, or a potential dating partner. And, if Jen were a true-blue kind of friend it might a different deal, but she's all over the place trying to control who can talk to whom, so I'd probably ignore the histrionics and just be social with everyone. If Corey is interested in you, don't drunk bang him. Make him date you or else you and Jen might just end up in the same dinghy together.
Buddhist Posted October 6, 2015 Posted October 6, 2015 I don't know... I'm seeing it a different way. Jen is the one who's running hot and cold, and all because she's being possessive over Corey when she has no place to be. It would be nice if you could all just get along, but that's not happening and it's because of Jen, not Corey. I'm just coming at it from the pure drama point of view. If Audrey wants to cut Jen loose then hell yeah go for it. But she sure as hell won't take it lying down, and if they become a couple then she will only seek to cause drama. No guy is ever worth the hassle. Neither is any friend of either in my opinion.
Author audreydash Posted October 6, 2015 Author Posted October 6, 2015 I'm just coming at it from the pure drama point of view. If Audrey wants to cut Jen loose then hell yeah go for it. But she sure as hell won't take it lying down, and if they become a couple then she will only seek to cause drama. No guy is ever worth the hassle. Neither is any friend of either in my opinion. thank you for you're opinion and taking the time to reply! I dont want to cut jen off, but i also dont want to throw away a great friendship with corey either and allow someone to tell me who I can and cannot be friends with because of their comfort level and insecurities
Author audreydash Posted October 6, 2015 Author Posted October 6, 2015 I don't know... I'm seeing it a different way. Jen is the one who's running hot and cold, and all because she's being possessive over Corey when she has no place to be. It would be nice if you could all just get along, but that's not happening and it's because of Jen, not Corey. If Jen and Corey had actually been in a relationship it might be different. She casually banged the guy; that doesn't take him off the market as a friend, a person you're allowed to talk to, or a potential dating partner. And, if Jen were a true-blue kind of friend it might a different deal, but she's all over the place trying to control who can talk to whom, so I'd probably ignore the histrionics and just be social with everyone. If Corey is interested in you, don't drunk bang him. Make him date you or else you and Jen might just end up in the same dinghy together. Thank you so much for you're advice! I agree that she shouldn't be acting like this and trying to control who i can and cannot talk to or be friends with, or hangout with. She made the choice to drunkenly hook up with him and he didn't like her and i can't control that. I hope to keep them both in my life, but idk what will happen. But thanks for you're opinion, honestly i feel the same way about the situation but needed to hear it from someone else too just to make sure i was being realistic lol and deffinitly no drunken hookups with corey, thats for sure
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