I still love my ex, he has a new baby with his girlfriend but wants to meet me

[Confusedsad81]

he has sporadically messaged me on a dating website, it was only on Saturday I found out he had just had a baby, I asked a question on here about it.

 

So I was shocked he messaged me again yesterday pretending to be someone else so got chatting and discovered it was him.i told him I didn't want to meet him ect and he kept typing please I want to meet you, I replied no I can't you've just had a baby. He started telling me he wanted to meet me so I would give him oral, and I was disgusted by him he then went on to tell me he needs excitment and I should meet up once a week, so I decided I'm going to make this idiot see he can't do that, because even though his girlfriend gave me a lot of grief and abuse I couldn't do that to her or let myself be degraded or used. So I chatted to him as maturely as I could (my heart was breaking) we sorted our differences aside I think then my attention turned to the innocent party his child, I told him what if he got caught out? I typed this to appeal to his better nature

 

If you cheat on your girlfriend and oral sex is still cheating, you will lose your son and become a McDonald's father

 

If you get caught cheating with me you will lose your son altogether because you told everyone I was crazy, that there will be karmas way of backfiring on you,

I told him stick it out for a year please, you need to be there to see your child's first step, first word and first everything, if after a year you still need to find excitment then leave because a child being brought up in a house void of love is not nice and we both know that ( both our fathers were scumbags) I told him-we are not our dads

I went on and typed , last year you have been contacting me through dating websites you don't love her, you feel obligated to stay with her because of the love you feel for your son.

you've involved me without my knowledge repeatable into this drama going on in your life and it's got to stop..I will not meet you,

 

He replied..you're right, thanks I've seen sense and I'm deleting this.

 

Did I do the right thing? I don't mean about the oral sex that's another row he got for that but with his child? I know it's not my business but it's my business if he's hassling me and begging me.

Edited October 2, 2015 by Somewhere

[stillafool]

Yes you did the right thing. This guy just wants to use you because his girl cannot give him sex right now. You see he immediately backed off as soon as you reminded him that he could lose his family which he does not want to do. He was basically treating you as less than a prostitute. At lease a prostitute would be paid to give him head once a month. You should be so insulted by the way he talked to you you should block him so he can never reach you again. He loves his girl and baby but wants to use you until his girl heals. Block this fool!

[Confusedsad81]

Even while she was pregnant and before she was pregnant he was contacting me via these sites, I want to put him behind me..I absolutely loved that man, and in ways I still do, I shouldn't but I do, he doesn't love her, that's not love to do that to someone who carries your child and gives birth to the child. He got her pregnant a few months after dating her, such a sad situation it won't last he's a sex addict and with small kids about its virtually impossible to have a sex life, I think she already has a with someone else and she's so young to..it's a total shame on her. I do feel sorry for her

[stillafool]

Even while she was pregnant and before she was pregnant he was contacting me via these sites, I want to put him behind me..I absolutely loved that man, and in ways I still do, I shouldn't but I do, he doesn't love her, that's not love to do that to someone who carries your child and gives birth to the child. He got her pregnant a few months after dating her, such a sad situation it won't last he's a sex addict and with small kids about its virtually impossible to have a sex life, I think she already has a with someone else and she's so young to..it's a total shame on her. I do feel sorry for her

 

He doesn't love you either. It's been 2 years and you should be over him by now. Why are you responding to him? He's with someone else and they have a baby.

[Confusedsad81]

becos when someone contacts me on a site I chat to them..when he is sitting pretending to be someone else I don't know it's him.. It's all down to him this

Not me

 

it's been 2 years yes my first real love, I don't want to but I can't help how I feel

[mrldii]

Did you do the right thing?

 

Yes...and no. Once you discovered the guy from a dating site was your ex who'd just become a father with another girl, and who just wants to hook up with you for a blow job,

 

you should have blocked him.

 

You're not his personal moral police. It's not on you to waste your breath telling him (or manual dexterity in typing to him) how what he's doing is totally inappropriate.

 

 

He lost the right to have you protect him from himself when he chose to break up with you, remember?

 

 

Best of luck to you, OP...

[d0nnivain]

You did the right thing. He sounds awful. I feel bad for the baby mamma.

[Confusedsad81]

I've asked him so many times to leave me alone I even asked if he wanted me to find happiness before, he said yes so I don't kno why he's doing this..he even accused me of having sex with some guy I don't know who the guy is, even if I did what had it to do with him that he felt he needed to message me on a dating site to abuse me?

 

I'm so confused because he dumped me, I've no confidence in myself to meet anyone and I use a dating site in the hope there is someone decent enough for me..I'm not unattractive I take good care of myself, I just want to get to my stage of happiness, everyone hopes for that.

[Confusedsad81]

he said to me before I changed my number because of the tormenting

 

You'll never get better than me..

 

what if he's right?

 

For those that said just ignore, it's not easy, I have tried and it makes him worse,

[mrldii]

he said to me before I changed my number because of the tormenting

 

You'll never get better than me..

 

what if he's right?

 

For those that said just ignore, it's not easy, I have tried and it makes him worse,

 

 

I'd put good money on the fact that you could walk out your front door, take a bus to the downtown section of your town, randomly pick up the first homeless guy you see and bring him home

 

and you'd already be doing better than your ex who's now got a girlfriend with whom he just had a baby but is on a dating site looking for blowjobs.

[Confusedsad81]

i even kept my profile picture the same on the site so he would know it was me so he would avoid like not accidentally click on it like the 300 times before when I used different pictures , it didn't work..

 

It's like 'look at me look at me' I still don't want u but going to torment the ****ing living day lights out of you..that's why I spoke to him on it yesterday to find out why as well..becos before when I found out it was him with his stupid pretending I'd block or just ignore him- conversation ended but this time I just wanted to know..

 

some my friends say it's guilt, others say it's because he still likes me,others think he is a stalker..and I just want to sit alone away from the noise and think

[d0nnivain]

You'll never get better than me..

 

what if he's right?

 

He's wrong. The 1st guy who isn't a liar & cheater is already better than him.

[Confusedsad81]

That's true he seems to have a high opinion of himself

[stillafool]

Maybe you should find another dating site that he isn't on. You need to not know anything about him and his life and he should no nothing about yours. This is the only way you will heal. Otherwise you are tormenting yourself.

[Confusedsad81]

I'm single, he isn't- tried the different dating sites but he got me on there as well