how to handle it when a guy just want sex?

[katiegrl]

Well look at it this way Katie. She actually offered to go for a walk with him instead, so on a subconscious level she was still leaving the door open. If women would start taking actions at face value and stop thinking that they can change guys they meet, they'd be better off IMO. I mean I still can't get over that. He says he wants to come over to her place in the middle of the night. But instead of simply never dealing with him again, she offers to go for a walk with him instead? Seems like she's kind of a glutton for punishment..LOL

 

 

Or maybe just naïve?

 

 

But I hear ya and mrldii and Ruby were right on too....

 

 

Should've just hung up on him.... it's never happened to me, but knowing me, if it did, I am pretty sure that is exactly what I would have done.

 

 

That is just RUDE and OBNOXIOUS behavior, freakin insulting really..... no two ways about it...

[mrldii]

Just like boys/men have it ingrained in their brains "You can't make a ho a wife", girls/women need to equally figure out "You can't make a loose-and-stiff prick your one-and-only pick."

 

 

[Woggle]

Just like boys/men have it ingrained in their brains "You can't make a ho a wife", girls/women need to equally figure out "You can't make a loose-and-stiff prick your one-and-only pick."

 

 

 

Exactly. Instead of getting mad at men for thinking this way adopt that way of thinking themselves. A player who knows how to push the right buttons does not make a good boyfriend.

[joseb]

I mean really dude? Do you REALLY think this is how you go about getting a chick into bed?

 

But then I thought about it more - and started wondering that maybe there are women who would go for this..... or fall for this crap.

 

Maybe even more than I think!!

 

I'm in my 30's and my single female friends are also in their 30s and this doesn't happen to them....but maybe with the younger 20ish crowd?

 

 

To the younger guys (or even older guys).... is this true? Are there women you meet that just want no-strings sex? And would be totally cool with what this asshat proposed?

 

..

 

I would never be this blatent. But i know a guy, recently split from his wife, where this is pretty much his modus operandi. He doesnt even try to dress it up at all. And you know what? It works for him. A lot. He is late 30s and so are most of the women. They are quite happy for a role in the hay, without all of the dating preludes.

[smackie9]

Sometimes....keep in mind I'm not say it's true for you BUT for some, you attract who you attract. Guys like that know how to pick out the weak, naive, oblivious, shy, low self esteem, self loathing, eager, needy, or visually slutty/attention seeker.

 

If you keep attracting guys that just want to f uck, maybe you should take a good look at your appearance and or demeanor. Or maybe you need to hone your skills on smelling the bs before you even give them the time of day, and shut them down without a thought.

[PogoStick]

When I first read this idiocy ^^, my thought was that this bozo's got to be real loser to think, for one second, that any women would fall for that crap.

 

 

I mean really dude? Do you REALLY think this is how you go about getting a chick into bed?

 

That approach works just fine when the woman wants the same thing. And yes, lots of women are excited for a late night random hookup. Nothing wrong with it.

 

I've had first "meeting" sex with at least 10 women, I'd guess. I say meeting because there was no preceding date. Just, "hey do you want to come hang out"? and sex ensued. That's not counting the women I met explicitly for sex, as in "Do you want to come over and bang?" in which case you can add another 10. God bless internet "dating".

[xcupid]

I'm single and sometimes I attract guys who just want to hook up.I'm just not cut out for Fwb or No strings attached sex .I get attached and start feeling resentful and rejected overtime over the fact that he doesn't want to date me.So I realized that its just not for me and I would rather be single and have nothing than any part time man.

 

with that being said, the last guy I met turned out to be only interested in sex.he wanted to come over at my house in the middle of the night the first time. I declined his offer and I suggested we go for a walk in the morning with his dog since we don't live too far from each other. He declined the offer and asked if my car has tinted windows.

 

I realized that we're just not on the same page so I told him I'm not looking for a random hook up.I'm looking for someone to date and go out to do things with.I want to keep our interactions outside our homes as we get to know each other first.I then asked him if he wants the same things as me or just a hook up?he just said "It is what I want"I then asked him to confirm if he is referring to hooking up or taking it slow?He never responded back and disappeared.Haven't heard from him since

 

I now wonder if I came he felt pressured to commit to me by my heavy texting. I didn't intended it to come off as me demanding relationship right away.I was open to go out for a coffee and see where it leads.

 

so my question is how can i handle this situation again when I spot a guy who is only after sex, without making the guy feel pressured for committement. I normally just go with the flow and see how it goes but this guy was giving signs that he's only after sex.Not sure if I came on too strong

 

 

Why do you care? If he wants sex from the start and you don't then he's not what you're looking for anyway. So it's NEXT instead of seeing if the guy wants a relationship.

[ManyDissapoint]

There is no surefire way to tell. Just make yourself into the highest quality woman you can be, and let your intentions be known. Look for inconsistencies in their behavior, and take things slow.

 

Give him enough rope to hang himself with. I'll let you interpret that as you may but essentially his intentional will bleed through in one way or another if you give it enough time. This doesn't mean you have to fade / ghost.

[SSM3]

I'm single and sometimes I attract guys who just want to hook up.I'm just not cut out for Fwb or No strings attached sex .I get attached and start feeling resentful and rejected overtime over the fact that he doesn't want to date me.So I realized that its just not for me and I would rather be single and have nothing than any part time man.

 

with that being said, the last guy I met turned out to be only interested in sex.he wanted to come over at my house in the middle of the night the first time. I declined his offer and I suggested we go for a walk in the morning with his dog since we don't live too far from each other. He declined the offer and asked if my car has tinted windows.

 

I realized that we're just not on the same page so I told him I'm not looking for a random hook up.I'm looking for someone to date and go out to do things with.I want to keep our interactions outside our homes as we get to know each other first.I then asked him if he wants the same things as me or just a hook up?he just said "It is what I want"I then asked him to confirm if he is referring to hooking up or taking it slow?He never responded back and disappeared.Haven't heard from him since

 

I now wonder if I came he felt pressured to commit to me by my heavy texting. I didn't intended it to come off as me demanding relationship right away.I was open to go out for a coffee and see where it leads.

 

so my question is how can i handle this situation again when I spot a guy who is only after sex, without making the guy feel pressured for committement. I normally just go with the flow and see how it goes but this guy was giving signs that he's only after sex.Not sure if I came on too strong

 

Trust me, you did nothing wrong!

[road]

OP, you handled it ok. Do not be afraid to be more direct. You can be very direct and still do it with tact.