xcupid Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 Can this relationship work? As far as looks go I'm about a 9, he's about a 4. I find him sexy. In terms of career and education we're in a similar place. He's very socially awkward, I am introverted too but quite socially confident. On the last date he asked me why I was with him and he told me I can do better. That was very off putting. That's what has made me post this question. Can this relationship work out? It's your relationship. You either make it work or not. It's up to you and your man. Good luck. 1
Redhead14 Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 I have a question . . . Did you approach and ask him out or did he ask you?
Leigh 87 Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 Nothing wrong with rating yourself. I am a 7. I don't view myself as above or below aside from if I have an obvious hot guy that girls fawn over which I find annoying.... 1
Leigh 87 Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 The best relationships I believe are when the man feels super lucky to have landed the woman. Women can fall had over heels smitten with average dudes. To me, chemistry trumps all else. Despite what he looks like to others. Men can't really be enamoured and instantly smitten with women who they aren't super attracted to to begin with....... I prefer it when a man is love crazy for me. Which comes from them thinking your stunning and then also loving your personality and having a deeper connection.... That's just me. Your situation sounds ideal...woman age worse than men usually so.... 2
deadelvis Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 But back when my GF was a smoking hot 10, she dated guys who were about a 4-6. It's pretty common actually. 1
katiegrl Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 (edited) Nothing wrong with rating yourself. I am a 7. I don't view myself as above or below aside from if I have an obvious hot guy that girls fawn over which I find annoying.... Leigh hun... you view YOURSELF as a 7....but trust me some people, maybe even many people, would rate you as a 9 or 10! Again, it's all subjective...and by the way, I have seen your photos and I personally would rate you an 8 or 9. So there ya go! The OP was not rating herself. Her 9 rating is how SHE believes others or how the world in general would rate her. As if it's FACT that she is a 9. Which IMO is a bit presumptuous (and ballsy) as, again, looks and attractiveness are both so subjective. One person's 9 could be ANOTHER person's 5....and vice versa! OP, the only person's opinion of his looks is YOU. If you think he is sexy and adorable, then chances are it will work out (if everything else clicks). Who cares if everyone else rates him a 4, so what? THEY are not dating him, YOU are. Are other people's opinions so important to you that you would base the success or non-success of your RL on what others think of his looks? Really? Edited September 30, 2015 by katiegrl 1
wb1988 Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 he asked me why I was with him and he told me I can do better. Really odd thing to say considering the context but it may be his way of pushing you away in an attempt to get you to want him more (or at least think about him more). I am an ex fashion model, now in my 30s. Great another model, lol like half all girls I meet irl claim to be 'models', it means nothing these days. Also you can't be a '9' and be 30f, it's not sexist it's just reality — there may be exceptions but I doubt you're one of them. Youre a 9? Did you assign that number to yourself? I hope you never tell him you think youre a 9 and he is a 4. It makes you sound super shallow. I know right
alphamale Posted September 30, 2015 Posted September 30, 2015 Can this relationship work out? sure it can, I have known a lot of attractive women who are married to average or below average looking men. the men just have to have some qualities that offset their lack of attractiveness
mrldii Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 WOW. When did the topic of this thread change to "WhoTF do women over 30 think they are, believing themselves to still be attractive...hrrrumph?!?" and whyTF is my browser not reflecting this new topic? Oh, well, since it's the new topic...ex-models who've remained attractive after 30 (a short list): Christie Brinkley Linda Evangelista Iman Christy Turlington Cindy Crawford Beverly Johnson Brooke Shields Tyra Banks Elle MacPherson Kathy Ireland Naomi Campbell 6
lollipopspot Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Your situation sounds ideal...woman age worse than men usually so.... I feel kind of bad for you that you think you will age worse than your guy... Also you can't be a '9' and be 30f, it's not sexist it's just reality — there may be exceptions but I doubt you're one of them. And I feel bad for the woman you're with. When did 30 become over the hill anyway? 2
guest569 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 But why do you rate him a 4 and then tell us he is a 9 "in my eyes"? Your eyes are the ones that have to look at him. Beauty is completley and utterly subjective. What exactly is the issue here: he had voiced concerns that he is not good enough and you seem to agree with these concerns. 1
h0000 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 WOW. When did the topic of this thread change to "WhoTF do women over 30 think they are, believing themselves to still be attractive...hrrrumph?!?" and whyTF is my browser not reflecting this new topic? Oh, well, since it's the new topic...ex-models who've remained attractive after 30 (a short list): Christie Brinkley Linda Evangelista Iman Christy Turlington Cindy Crawford Beverly Johnson Brooke Shields Tyra Banks Elle MacPherson Kathy Ireland Naomi Campbell They are INTERNATIONAL. SUPER. models who made MILLIONS. Is OP one of them? Doooooubt it. So yeah I don't think she is a 9. Plus this mindset is utterly off-putting (that she is a nine and he is a four). I bet those super models don't necessary see themselves as 9. That's why they succeeded: the humble attitude. I can't imagine a woman think sooo high of herself being attractive personality wise.
wb1988 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 (edited) Oh, well, since it's the new topic...ex-models who've remained attractive after 30 (a short list): Christie Brinkley Linda Evangelista Iman Christy Turlington Cindy Crawford Beverly Johnson Brooke Shields Tyra Banks Elle MacPherson Kathy Ireland Naomi Campbell Just lookup all of them and put 2014 or 2015, half of those women (more so the lower half) are ugly af and the rest are just ugly with the exception of the 1st one. They are all examples of the effects of father time on women. Also Iman is one those models that's like Lady Gaga, without all the makeup and photoshop they probably look like oprah. Edited October 1, 2015 by wb1988
katiegrl Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 The irony is that all of those models are now known for their name rather than looks. Also half of those women (more so the lower half) are ugly af. Oh man have you seen Cindy Crawford and Christie Brinkley lately? Christie Brinkley is 60+ -- she is in some car commercial and hell she looks like she's 25! No joke. Cindy Crawford was on GMA this morn promoting her new book - she will be 50 next February and she looks the exact same as she did when she was 28. Iman sells clothes on QVC and she is smoking hot. Tyra Banks has a new talk show....she looks like she is 30 - with a new short hairdo! Brooke Shields is the spokesperson for Lazy Boy furniture, still gorgeous and hot and she is 50! Was that half? LOL Don't believe me....go ahead and google them (recent pics). 1
Leigh 87 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Leigh hun... you view YOURSELF as a 7....but trust me some people, maybe even many people, would rate you as a 9 or 10! Again, it's all subjective...and by the way, I have seen your photos and I personally would rate you an 8 or 9. So there ya go! The OP was not rating herself. Her 9 rating is how SHE believes others or how the world in general would rate her. As if it's FACT that she is a 9. Which IMO is a bit presumptuous (and ballsy) as, again, looks and attractiveness are both so subjective. One person's 9 could be ANOTHER person's 5....and vice versa! OP, the only person's opinion of his looks is YOU. If you think he is sexy and adorable, then chances are it will work out (if everything else clicks). Who cares if everyone else rates him a 4, so what? THEY are not dating him, YOU are. Are other people's opinions so important to you that you would base the success or non-success of your RL on what others think of his looks? Really? Blushes. You're so sweet. But yeah a few men have been nasty to me about my looks so looks will always be subjective to an extent... Some men think I am stunning ( I've been called an 8 and 9 by plenty of men) where as others had told me I am ugly or plain or bad looking....... The thing is, fashion models and certain people will always be hot and attractive and beautiful to MORE people than the average person experiences..... If the op was a fashion model, I can see why he's intimidated and feeling insecure. Who wouldn't? She's obviously a type of woman who has a higher than average number of men who look twice at her and find her gorgeous...... I dated a guy prior to my current boyfriend and he'd tell me how many women would hit on him. Gross. So long as the OP doesn't rub it in that she's desirable! I don't rub in that a lot of men look at me and I make my boyfriend feel like he's the only guy around me. He doesn't need to know that other men look. The OPS boyfriend may hate how men state at her when they are out. My boyfriend personally hates it so he actually averts people gazes before he just doesn't want to look at all the guys staring. Yes, non fashion models get stared at allllll the time in front of their boyfriends...... Why doesn't the OP just never talk about other men and do everything she can to make him feel secure? If she never mentions other men and she is attentive and affectionate to his taste and desire level, and she doesn't hang out one on one with " male friends ", then nothing short of therapy will help...... 1
BluEyeL Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Oh common people, get over the fact that she dared to rate herself as a 9! Why do you care so much? She probably is objectively more attractive than the guy she's with, I don't care that she said she's a 9 and maybe she's a 7 or whatever ( I think number ratings are silly anyway), and she doesn't care about that, but he does, and that was her question. Stop giving her so much grief. 5
mrldii Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 They are INTERNATIONAL. SUPER. models who made MILLIONS... Nahhhhh. The posts here on The New Topic have been quite emphatic...and I quote: "... If you're in your 30's, you're not a 9." "...Also you can't be a '9' and be 30f[emale]..." "...woman age worse than men usually so..." Other than the fact that OP mentioned she used to be a model, the consensus is quite clear: women over 30 are *never* able to be 9s, regardless of their [previous] profession. Who knew?!? OP also mentioned that it is the guy, himself, who has told her "[she] can do better than [him]" (looks-wise); it is he who has created the attention / potential mismatch over their differences in physical attractiveness...NOT her. Her question - which most (for some *odd* reason) have overlooked in their haste to quick-like put the female OP back in her place was: "Can this relationship work out?" She actually asked it twice, in the OP. Quite a few didn't notice the question, when replying. 1
h0000 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Oh man have you seen Cindy Crawford and Christie Brinkley lately? Christie Brinkley is 60+ -- she is in some car commercial and hell she looks like she's 25! No joke. Cindy Crawford was on GMA this morn promoting her new book - she will be 50 next February and she looks the exact same as she did when she was 28. Iman sells clothes on QVC and she is smoking hot. Tyra Banks has a new talk show....she looks like she is 30 - with a new short hairdo! Brooke Shields is the spokesperson for Lazy Boy furniture, still gorgeous and hot and she is 50! Was that half? LOL Don't believe me....go ahead and google them (recent pics). There is no need to persuade him that they are beautiful. It's all subjective.
Leigh 87 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 They are INTERNATIONAL. SUPER. models who made MILLIONS. Is OP one of them? Doooooubt it. So yeah I don't think she is a 9. Plus this mindset is utterly off-putting (that she is a nine and he is a four). I bet those super models don't necessary see themselves as 9. That's why they succeeded: the humble attitude. I can't imagine a woman think sooo high of herself being attractive personality wise. I wouldn't count Naomi Campbell as " humble " exactly... They are successful because of the looks even if they are a B* tch of a person.... The OP may be a 9. She was a fashion model after all. 1
katiegrl Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 But yeah a few men have been nasty to me about my looks so looks will always be subjective to an extent... . Those men were probably "negging" you hun... I cannot imagine any man being nasty to you about your looks, seriously. Even assuming you were not good looking, that's just cruel. But yeah, it's all subjective. 2
mrldii Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Just lookup all of them and put 2014 or 2015, half of those women (more so the lower half) are ugly af and the rest are just ugly with the exception of the 1st one. They are all examples of the effects of father time on women. Also Iman is one those models that's like Lady Gaga, without all the makeup and photoshop they probably look like oprah. Nahhhh. We just learned from another post that SUPERMODELS. MAKE MONEY. OFF THEIR LOOKS. The fact that they all are still making money OFF THEIR LOOKS proves that you are either in the minority when declaring they are "ugly af" or you are angry that even old women, who should be desperate enough by now, still aren't interested. In any event, OP asked (twice) in her OP: "Can this relationship work out?" While making quite a few posts in this thread, you've neglected to address the topic OF it. In any event, I've more than made my point in this thread, and I've already addressed the OP's OP. I'll leave it to someone else to flag the off-topic replies in this thread and get it back on track...something that typically happens quite readily and quickly when the glass slipper is on the other foot. 2
katiegrl Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 I wouldn't count Naomi Campbell as " humble " exactly... They are successful because of the looks even if they are a B* tch of a person.... The OP may be a 9. She was a fashion model after all. Fashion model means she knows how to model clothes. She's most likely tall and very thin.... Had she been a face model or cover girl, her attitude would make more sense. But hey, good for her for rating herself a 9. Having confidence is fabulous. But when someone starts making blanket statements claiming to be a 9 or 10, as if it's FACT.... that sounds a bit presumptuous (arrogant) IMHO!!
h0000 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Nahhhhh. The posts here on The New Topic have been quite emphatic...and I quote: "... If you're in your 30's, you're not a 9." "...Also you can't be a '9' and be 30f[emale]..." "...woman age worse than men usually so..." Other than the fact that OP mentioned she used to be a model, the consensus is quite clear: women over 30 are *never* able to be 9s, regardless of their [previous] profession. Who knew?!? OP also mentioned that it is the guy, himself, who has told her "[she] can do better than [him]" (looks-wise); it is he who has created the attention / potential mismatch over their differences in physical attractiveness...NOT her. Her question - which most (for some *odd* reason) have overlooked in their haste to quick-like put the female OP back in her place was: "Can this relationship work out?" She actually asked it twice, in the OP. Quite a few didn't notice the question, when replying. I wasn't debating whether women can be 9 at 30s. I was pointing out the OP cant be a 9 or she would be in Hollywood making movies. And more importantly those movies stars don't all see themselves as 9. And I think whoever thinks so high of themselves will appear (more or less) arrogant or snobbish around some people or some things. And that is off-putting.
Redhead14 Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Fashion model means she knows how to model clothes. She's most likely tall and very thin.... Had she been a face model or cover girl, her attitude would make more sense. But hey, good for her for rating herself a 9. Having confidence is fabulous. But when someone starts making blanket statements claiming to be a 9 or 10, as if it's FACT.... that sounds a bit presumptuous (arrogant) IMHO!! This is the reason I asked the question about who asked who which hasn't been answered. I am a little suspect of this scenario. The answer to that question may confirm my suspicion. I won't edify until I see that answer.
katiegrl Posted October 1, 2015 Posted October 1, 2015 Her question - which most (for some *odd* reason) have overlooked in their haste to quick-like put the female OP back in her place was: "Can this relationship work out?" She actually asked it twice, in the OP. Quite a few didn't notice the question, when replying. In case the OP missed it.... excerpt from my post no. 79... >>OP, the only person's opinion of his looks is YOU. If you think he is sexy and adorable, then chances are it will work out (if everything else clicks). Who cares if everyone else rates him a 4, so what? THEY are not dating him, YOU are. Are other people's opinions so important to you that you would base the success or non-success of your RL on what others think of his looks? 1
Recommended Posts