My otherwise decent roommate is driving me up the wall

[OrangeParty]

I really shouldn't complain, because I've had far, far worse roommates in the past and I would prefer to live with him over any of the others.

 

I'm 29, and he's still only 20.

 

He's one of those people who just cannot go 2 minutes without talking. I, on the other hand, find silences comforting. The part that drives me up the wall are the inane questions that he asks when there's a really obvious answer to it.

 

For example, I have a cat. I scoop the litter box every day at the same time. He would see me scooping, and he would ask "Are you scooping the litter box?"

 

Or I am prepping food, chopping vegetables, clearly doing things you would do when you want to cook to eat, and he would ask, "Are you making dinner?"

 

Or I come home with a Macy's shopping bag, and he would ask "Did you go shopping? Where? At Macy's?"

 

It doesn't stop there though. It is usually followed by a series of questions like so:

 

"Does the litter box smell?"

"Is there enough litter in the box?"

 

"How was your meal that you cooked by yourself?"

"Do you like it?"

"Do you usually make your own food? Do you not like eating out?"

 

"Do you always go to Macy's?"

 

These aren't new, intriguing events. These are mundane, routine activities that I do all the time. I get that if it's the first time you saw me cook, or scoop the box, then it's a conversation starter. But after months of living together? How the hell do you want me to answer them? Of course I like my food, why would I make it otherwise??

 

One particular time, he came home and I was working at my desk. I looked up, acknowledged him, went back to work, and realized that he was standing there staring at me. So I looked up again, and he asked, "What? No hello, no how's your day, nothing?" You would think we were married.

 

He would totally interrupt me when I'm in the middle of something intense, like a book, or a gaming session with a friend, or a suspenseful movie, just to ask one of these questions. The other day he interrupted me just to ask "is McDonald's still open?" at 6pm, when he knows very well that the McD's near our place is open 24/7.

 

I get that he's probably trying to be polite or make small talk, but damn, every time I hear these questions, I just want to yell "PLEASE PLEASE LET'S TALK ABOUT SOMETHING THAT'S INTELLECTUALLY ENGAGING."

 

It's gotten to the point where I dread whenever he walks out of his room.

 

I'm spoiled by my previous roommate, who was truly the best roommate I had (also my best friend of 8 years). We were very in tune with each other personality wise, and we were very comfortable with each other. Silences were never awkward between us. Silences weren't signs of "I'm ignoring you", but of "I enjoy your presence here".

 

I'm just thankful that he spends most of his time in his room. I don't know what I would do if we were in the same room all the time and I get these small talk every few minutes.

 

Now I just keep a list of "topics" near my desk, so that when he comes to my room, I pre-empt it by talking about those "topics" instead. That way, he gets his talking time, and I get to talk about something I actually care about.

[CarrieT]

The guy is not a mind-reader.

 

He won't know what he is saying is annoying unless you tell him.

 

Communicate, communicate, communicate...