Aritzia Posted September 29, 2015 Posted September 29, 2015 So this guy (29) and myself (26) have been seeing each other off and on for about 8-9 months. I would say the first 4 months were more of a FWB, then for 2 months things stopped, he decided to mess around with someone else, and for the last 2 months things really picked up for us. ( I just found out about her ) Within the last two months, we've done what most couples do - lots of dinners, movies, mini adventures, and lots of banging. But unfortunately no title. He got out of a relationship, LT of about two years last summer, and with his job being as stressful as it is (he's a cop) he kinda wants to see where things go with me - I also work shift work so our schedules hardly match up. I want a relationship. But I'm not making excuses for him as to why he can't commit, he would continually say lets go with the flow, see where things go - during this time he did all the initiating of most of our plans, I kinda felt like things were going in the right direction. Fast forward to the last few weeks, we've been arguing a lot. I think because I want things to work more than he does, so I'm always trying to take advantage of the time we have off together and hang out, but he's been bailing on me lately saying he's feeling " blah, tired, not feelin it. " I think he may be depressed and stressed but I am not here to cure that, I try to put myself out there to better his life but he continued to bail. We got in a very big fight last week, and he ended everything. Said he can't offer an all or nothing relationship, said I was crazy for getting upset with him ect. I walked away, accepted his decision, respected it and stopped texting and all contact for a few days. It didn't last because he kept texting me, would say how weird it was that I wasn't there anymore to talk to him, randomly texted me about his family, sending me pictures of his truck, just random stuff. 4 days after our fight I asked him where we stand, I don't understand why if he wanted to end things, what's the point of still talking to me when he made it clear he wanted nothing to do with me.. He said he was over what happened, didn't care about our argument and wanted to get things back to where they were before. Two days ago he told me that he wanted me to move into his house, that way I could help with rent. But wtf? Less than a week ago he was done with me. Last night he said he wanted to go out later this week, after work. He said he is unsure about what he wants to do with me, sexually, but is still interested. I asked him if he was seeing someone else because I don't understand how we can do what we were doing as often, to now being unsure of things. He said no, he wasn't seeing anybody. What do I do with this guy? I feel like we both really care for each other, but I'm exhausted with going back and forth. I want to see if things could potentially workout, and I want a commitment from him - but it shouldn't take 9 months for anyone to make up their mind. I don't know if I should wait a bit longer, because things are okay but not great right now and As he said, he wanted to get back to where things were before.
PogoStick Posted September 29, 2015 Posted September 29, 2015 What are you going to be happy accepting? Are you willing to just be a fk buddy? If so stick around. If you want a high quality, long term relationship, then RUN AWAY.
kpl Posted September 29, 2015 Posted September 29, 2015 don't wait move on, next He told you he wasn't interested when he ended things, listen to the person that was willing to walk away. Even if you get back with him when things get tough will he bail? Then try to get back together?
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