tastefulone Posted September 28, 2015 Posted September 28, 2015 I am in my thirties and feeling like crap I am tired of relationships and how they always seem to fail. I don't know how many times that I have tried to make a relationship work and I am not the one to throw the towel in and seems to be the female who does. My failure is a result of me wanting to try harder self improvement but at the same time wanting or have feelings inside of me that want me to get revenge by making her jealous. I know that wont work... and that is why I am not going to do that. It seems that my problems always come from ME NOT HAVING MONEY and is bs! I only wish I could have a steady job yea, I am holding two degrees software engineering which I totally suck at and a masters in business admin which no one will hire me for. The last three jobs that I had I've been laid off from. Some times I feel like I am crying on the inside and yes makes my eyes well up into tears. Killing myself always seemed like a great idea until I actually had an out of body experience (bad car wreck) cpr was done and it scared me to not want to die ever again. (IT WAS NOT PLEASANT, nor DID I GO TO THE LIGHT) So of course I won't be doing that. My mind seems to be racing right now that she left me. I'm alone without my family, my 7 months old they are in another state, county, district. Yes, a long drive from here. I am not sure how I should feel about building my website you can see that on my profile, I don't want to get kicked off of here because I need you and I know you have good advice for me. But I couldn't help but to build it only because it was the feelings that I had at the time... DID I SEND HER IT... NO! but boy I sure wanted to. I do get productive when I am hurt! ANY ADVICE ON THAT WOULD BE BENEFICIAL TOO! My love for her is love she is the mother of my child, I would rather not have anyone else but to only throw all my love that I Have for my kids. Yes, I failed at a marriage who I have two boys with and share custody with them too. DO I WANT TO BE APART from my CHILDREN? NO WAY! What am I going to do, I have one child in another state and two in my present state. Yes, that is a serious question. Please help me, I know to take it one day at a time and I know things always work out maybe not how I expected it but they do work out. should I relax a bit?
NVO Posted September 28, 2015 Posted September 28, 2015 should I relax a bit? Yes, you should. I do get productive when I am hurt! ANY ADVICE ON THAT WOULD BE BENEFICIAL TOO! I'm sorry that I can not help you with all the other issues because I think other people on this forum are way more capable of helping you. But, I do find this part interesting because I get creative too when I'm hurt. But, seems like you channel that creativity in negative energy. Why not use it to create something positive? I started a blog and although it's not something I write for on a monthly, or weekly basis or so, the positive reactions I get from other people really help me to deal with my pain.
pteromom Posted September 28, 2015 Posted September 28, 2015 No, do not seek revenge. Remember your child. Remember that your child is half your ex, and that anything you do to hurt your ex can reach past her to your child. I can't view your web page, but if it is about your ex, please take it offline. It just makes you look like a jerk. Focus your hurt into making your own life better, for you and for your child. Forget your ex other than whatever interactions you must have with her for co-parenting. Instead, focus on finding a job, getting in shape, reconnecting to who you used to be, being a good dad, and finding reasons to laugh.
pteromom Posted September 28, 2015 Posted September 28, 2015 What am I going to do, I have one child in another state and two in my present state. Yes, that is a serious question. See all your children as often as you can. When you can't, call them and send them cards and letters. When you get a job again, be a good dad and help pay for raising them. And when you get into another relationship, use a condom always. Or even get a vasectomy so you don't have to worry about more children.
craw Posted September 28, 2015 Posted September 28, 2015 I am a bit confused, you should be able to score a job easily as a software engineer.
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