How many of you wished your ex hurt as much as they hurt you?

[Toodaloo]

this damage was caused by someone we trusted, loved, and bared our soul to. We stripped ourselves of our protective walls, lay there naked to trust this person with our heart and we gave it to them trusting they would never bring harm to it. However, they did. This pain was not inflicted upon our own actions, it was because of these people. We did not ask for this, so I completely disagree with "we hurt ourselves" - we absolutely do not just because we want to be loved - complete opposite of hurt.

 

But what you fail to understand is that when you do care deeply about someone their pain is your pain. It doesn't matter if they were the ones that broke up with you or the other way round...

 

With the friends of mine who are ex lovers their pain now is still my pain because I still care very deeply for them. That care is not as a lover but as a very dear and close friend who I can still openly bare my soul.

 

Those who are not still friends are not friends for a reason. Its because they were in some way incompatible with me in my life so never going to be a part of it long term. It still hurts to say good bye but that is mourning a situation that you had hopes for but was in fact not reality. So therefore you are mourning a dream.

 

Its OK to do that as long as you let it go and move on.

 

Not all harm is intentional. While it hurts - it would be a sad day to not forgive that.

[lil hoodlum]

The best revenge anybody here can have is to live well. Nothing makes the souls of people who hurt you burn inside like them seeing you happy and doing well. To spend energy wanting to hurt them means you are thinking of them which actually makes them feel good in some sick way.

 

 

I'm not convinced that this applies to all ex's.

 

 

Some of them are so cold-hearted and callous that they really couldn't give two sh.its about the dumpees.

 

 

Just saying....

[little princess]

But what you fail to understand is that when you do care deeply about someone their pain is your pain. It doesn't matter if they were the ones that broke up with you or the other way round...

 

 

 

I agree with you. When you deeply love someone, their pain becomes your pain. So if you see the one you love is in pain, you will only end up in more pain. It even hurted me to think bad of him, because I did not know him as bad at all.

 

We should not wish that they get hurt, but I wish that he will realize what he did, and how much pain and harm it caused to me. Not go through the same, but just realize.

[Apparition]

Toodaloo, I agree with you about their pain being ours but it should not be a one-way street and this is what I am saying. If they were hurting over the break-up like we do, it would mean they cared and it wasn't a one-way street, that was my point. It's human to want another human being to care for them when they've invested so much time and effort into them, so if that means I wish they'd feel exactly what I do when going through a break-up, you're damn right I do.

 

Part of me does, and part of me doesn't. The part of me that does is human and aches, craves, wants and needs. The part of me that doesn't is selfless, but still aching, craving and wanting. I'm torn and although it would pain me to see her in pain, it would also give me a sense of relief to know that I'm not the only one carrying it around and that she cares about me. I think that's what all of us want at the end of the day. To be cared for.

[RIPolaris]

I do not wish harm upon my ex but I don't wish her happiness either. I hope she gets what she deserves as I do with everyone else. That being said I do at times wish she would feel what I felt. The misery that she left me in just so she could see the sea of agony that she left me drifting in. She cheated, lied, manipulated, and didn't even have the damn courtesy to tell me to face that it was over, she simply sent me a text. She left me for her ex and the fact that she's with him and didn't even apologize for all the **** she put me through shows that she didn't care for me at all.

 

I forgave her, I didn't tell her (NC). I forgave her for me because I'm a much better person than she is and I know she's not even worth hating.

 

I do, and I know I shouldnt, feel a sense of satisfaction know that her relationship with her ex will fail, miserably. I don't wish for it to happen, I'm just positive it will.

 

I agree with some of the previous posters in that I think the biggest form of revenge you could possibly manifest is simply being happy and showing them that you don't them in your life. That you're doing perfectly fine without them.

[Hope87]

I got revenge on my ex and it felt/feels very satisfying and liberating. He deserved it it's done and I feel like I can work on healing myself now. I miss him and still cry every day but I feel satisfied he didn't get away with it. Must sleep now and I will elaborate later today.

 

 

Hello Meta versus,do you mind elaborating on how you got revenge on your ex? Also, in another thread, you mentioned that you and your ex are no longer on cordial terms...How did that happen? I read your thread and learnt a great deal from it which is helping with my own situation.

 

Look forward to hearing from you.