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Should I ask?


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Posted

I met a man online last weekend for our first date. We both had a great evening. He even texted me a few days later saying that he really enjoyed our night out together.

 

During one of the conversations we had before we met in IRL, he asked me if I wanted to go to a concert next month. Well, I didn't give him an answer right away because I wanted to meet him IRL before I said yes.

 

Now that we have met, he never has brought up the concert. We are still texting each other. I would like to go to the concert, should I bring it up to him?

 

I am just lost on what to do.

Posted

Yes, ask him about hit. "Are you still going to concert" - that simple question may prompt a "yes, you still want to go?" If he doesn't ask - perhaps because he doesn't realize you're giving him an in, say "I'm going too - you want to meet up or go together" and then go out and buy a ticket.

 

Don't be a slave to the rules all the time. He may not have brought it up because you haven't mentioned it. A lot of nice guys don't always understand the whole rules of dating as laid out by popular culture.

  • Like 1
Posted

What the heck is "IRL"? Wish people would stop with these abbreviations. Does my head in!

  • Author
Posted

Sorry, I should have typed out in real life.

 

:)

Posted

OP: Yes, ask. Well I wouldn't "ask", I would bring it up AS IF we are naturally going.

 

Zippy: In Real Life

  • Author
Posted (edited)
Yes, ask him about hit. "Are you still going to concert" - that simple question may prompt a "yes, you still want to go?" If he doesn't ask - perhaps because he doesn't realize you're giving him an in, say "I'm going too - you want to meet up or go together" and then go out and buy a ticket.

 

Don't be a slave to the rules all the time. He may not have brought it up because you haven't mentioned it. A lot of nice guys don't always understand the whole rules of dating as laid out by popular culture.

 

 

I do know that he hasn't been in the dating scene for over 20 years.

 

He was very hesitant to call me when I gave him my phone number, which I thought was endearing.

 

When we did meet he was actually cool, I was the one that was a bundle of nerves.

 

When we talked about the concert he had already purchased his ticket and was willing to sell his, so that he could purchase ours together.

 

I guess I will never know the answer, if I don't ask.

Edited by upinthesky69
Posted

Yup, just ask OP! Ball's in your court and I bet he would still love to take you.

Posted

It took a few days for him to let you know he had a good time on your first date? I doubt you are going to the concert. Are you more concerned with the concert or the fact that it is with him?

  • Author
Posted
It took a few days for him to let you know he had a good time on your first date? I doubt you are going to the concert. Are you more concerned with the concert or the fact that it is with him?

 

It took him a few days to respond because he was out of service range over the weekend. He was out checking out his camp site for hunting. Which is a big thing for around these parts.

 

I am not giving excuse but I already knew ahead of time that he would be out of the area over the weekend.

Posted

And again the question would still be Are you more concerned with the concert or more time with him?

  • Author
Posted

Actually more time with him.

Posted

then don't press about the stupid concert or that is what he will think

Posted

If you are following some kind of dating rules: texting is not something you want to be doing in the beginning of your getting to know each other stage. That's something desperate people use to keep a relationship from dying.

Two your communicating but your not saying anything important. that's why dating rules tell you to not talk so much and to say only what is truly important, to increase social play. Do you want him to invite you to a concert? Or do you want to invite yourself?? If he wants to invite you, he will. Guys become incredibly courageous when they like a girl. If he doesn't invite you - he's just not that into you.

  • Author
Posted

I decided not to ask him about the concert and move on.

 

The way I look at it, I had a good time and got to experience a burlesque show.

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted

Well he called me last week to see how I was doing. We talked about our weekend plans. Since I haven't heard from him, I had plans to go out to the movies and shopping with some friends. He was telling me that he was hanging out with his kids and then going to the concert. He said it wasn't going to be fun without a date. Seriously? I didn't know how to reply to that, quickly changed the subject. He also asked me if I was on Facebook, and wanted to know my last name so he could stalk me (inside joke).

 

I sometimes think I am better off getting a dog, than dating.

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