tokyo Posted May 20, 2005 Posted May 20, 2005 In a way I find all these questions and doubts to be understandable, in another way I'd say they are problems of an idle self-centered mind. I assume you have few friends, few hobbies and your whole life revolved around your boyfriend. He was the center of your universe and now that you lost him, you lost your religion, too. Reach out to other people and you will feel less lonely. Worry less about problems that in fact don't touch your life and you will start to enjoy your life and the presence of other people in it. This feeling of being alone will go, when you get to know their feelings and fears, through your interaction with them they cease to be constructs of your mind. You question the existence of things, because you're not really in touch with them and look at things from a very theoretical point of view, that's why you think that an answer to your questions is so important. Theories are not life though. Theoretically all the pain and joy in this world might not be real, they might be biochemical reactions in your brain, a dream. Practically I would find it nicer for everyone if there was more joy then pain and it would be great if at the end of my life I can look back and say that somehow I contributed to this. What you're experiencing is a phase that will pass one day.
Author questioveritas Posted May 20, 2005 Author Posted May 20, 2005 Originally posted by Devildog Do you believe you could possibly know everything there is to know? That isn't possible. So why does not having answers to this question bother you? And even if the world is a figment of your imagination, what has changed? What will change? If we are all figments of your imagination, we are still here even though you question where we come from. Years from now, when your own existence on this plane ends, what does it matter? If we are not real so what if we stop existing as well? I think your best course of action is to find a belief system, not neccesarily a religion, that gives you comfort. Be it reincarnation, an afterlife like the Native Americans believed in or whatever. Your answer to what happens at the end is just as valid as anyone elses. No, I don't think I can ever know. I guess that's the problem, because if I don't know anything could be true! I guess if the world was a figment of my imagination I would be extremely depressed, because then I would be competely alone. Talking to people would be pointless because they wouldn't be thinking, feeling beings, but just like characters in a dream! I would feel so lonely and hopeless that I'd want to die. Would you feel the same way if people weren't real?
Author questioveritas Posted May 20, 2005 Author Posted May 20, 2005 Originally posted by kooky In a way I find all these questions and doubts to be understandable, in another way I'd say they are problems of an idle self-centered mind. I assume you have few friends, few hobbies and your whole life revolved around your boyfriend. He was the center of your universe and now that you lost him, you lost your religion, too. Reach out to other people and you will feel less lonely. Worry less about problems that in fact don't touch your life and you will start to enjoy your life and the presence of other people in it. This feeling of being alone will go, when you get to know their feelings and fears, through your interaction with them they cease to be constructs of your mind. You question the existence of things, because you're not really in touch with them and look at things from a very theoretical point of view, that's why you think that an answer to your questions is so important. Theories are not life though. Theoretically all the pain and joy in this world might not be real, they might be biochemical reactions in your brain, a dream. Practically I would find it nicer for everyone if there was more joy then pain and it would be great if at the end of my life I can look back and say that somehow I contributed to this. What you're experiencing is a phase that will pass one day. I really hope you're right. It's completely true that my life revolved around my ex-fiance, and that I don't have many friends or hobbies outside of that. But then again, I've always spent a lot of time alone and never asked these questions before. Why now? It's true that when I'm with other people I don't feel as bad, but sometimes I worry that they might not be real and I start feeling very alone and scared. Last night I was feeling really depressed and I woke my parents, they were talking to me and sometimes I'd just say "how can I be sure you're real"? Do you still think this is just a phase and that I'll be okay?
Devildog Posted May 21, 2005 Posted May 21, 2005 Originally posted by questioveritas No, I don't think I can ever know. I guess that's the problem, because if I don't know anything could be true! I guess if the world was a figment of my imagination I would be extremely depressed, because then I would be competely alone. Talking to people would be pointless because they wouldn't be thinking, feeling beings, but just like characters in a dream! I would feel so lonely and hopeless that I'd want to die. Would you feel the same way if people weren't real? No, I don't think I would feel that way. I believe that the world is more than a figment of my imagination. Where did I come from otherwise? There has to be more than just my imagination if I am here to begin with. questioveritas, I hope you are going to get some professional help to deal with what you are dealing with. You are not the first person to question these things, but I get the impression you might need more qualified help to find your answers than I can give you. This is just a phase you are going through. But the effect it is having on you worries me a bit. You will get past this phase, but it might be helpful for you to talk to a professional to help guide you through this phase safely.
suegail Posted May 21, 2005 Posted May 21, 2005 questioveritas, you're a good person and you're intelligent. Maybe one day you'll look back on this time in your life as a blessing in disguise. Many people live an entire life and never ponder these things. I'm going to give you my opinion and you can take it for what it's worth to you. (That's my disclaimer) What I feel is happening to you is God is speaking to your heart. These questions you have are far beyond any of us here, and what you need is to have some peace, some sense of assurance that there is much more to life than just a physical existence here on earth. When we ask God for wisdom and guidance, it is said that when we seek God with all our hearts, we will find him, when we ask, with faith that what we wish to gain is what God wants for us as well, these are prayers God will honor every time. I have no doubt. I think you are on a spiritual journey, and I think you should face it with courage despite your many fears. Believe me, you're much stronger than you think. You've lost a boyfriend you have loved with all your heart and that's very hard, but it's also a turning point in your life. You'll come through this. I know you will, and you'll be a much strengthened young woman.
Author questioveritas Posted May 21, 2005 Author Posted May 21, 2005 Originally posted by Devildog No, I don't think I would feel that way. I believe that the world is more than a figment of my imagination. Where did I come from otherwise? There has to be more than just my imagination if I am here to begin with. questioveritas, I hope you are going to get some professional help to deal with what you are dealing with. You are not the first person to question these things, but I get the impression you might need more qualified help to find your answers than I can give you. This is just a phase you are going through. But the effect it is having on you worries me a bit. You will get past this phase, but it might be helpful for you to talk to a professional to help guide you through this phase safely. I really hope that I can come to feel about all this the way you do. I guess in the end it is about belief, I really want to believe that this world and the people in it are real. (Or at least that the people are real.) I can see how it's logical and probable that it's real, but the possibility that it might not be is so terrifying. I am getting professional help in a week! I really hope that with help I can be normal again. I'm probably going to end up taking medication because I think I've had pretty serious depression, anxiety, and obsessiveness for a while now. Thanks for all that you wrote It's nice to hear that people think it's just a phase and not full blown schizophrenia or something like that
Author questioveritas Posted May 21, 2005 Author Posted May 21, 2005 Originally posted by suegail questioveritas, you're a good person and you're intelligent. Maybe one day you'll look back on this time in your life as a blessing in disguise. Many people live an entire life and never ponder these things. I'm going to give you my opinion and you can take it for what it's worth to you. (That's my disclaimer) What I feel is happening to you is God is speaking to your heart. These questions you have are far beyond any of us here, and what you need is to have some peace, some sense of assurance that there is much more to life than just a physical existence here on earth. When we ask God for wisdom and guidance, it is said that when we seek God with all our hearts, we will find him, when we ask, with faith that what we wish to gain is what God wants for us as well, these are prayers God will honor every time. I have no doubt. I think you are on a spiritual journey, and I think you should face it with courage despite your many fears. Believe me, you're much stronger than you think. You've lost a boyfriend you have loved with all your heart and that's very hard, but it's also a turning point in your life. You'll come through this. I know you will, and you'll be a much strengthened young woman. Thanks for responding Personally I think the people who don't think about these things are very lucky. It's hard to imagine that I'll ever see this as a blessing, because I'm afraid that I'll have "what if it's not real" fears for the rest of my life. I would love to have the sense of assurance that at least the physical existence here on earth and the people in it are real. I'm so confused right now.
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