some ways it could be karma in others it would seem I'm spiteful

[Confusedsad81]

Been dumped 2 years and in 2 years had been mocked and ridiculed by ex lover and his girlfriend so I changed my number Found out ex has just had a baby and playing happy families but still trawling dating sites even contacted me once or twice for put downs of course. Those two made fun of me when I was at my lowest, my teenage daughter had tried to commit suicide and was getting prank windups from them and constant abuse about I was this and that and I was a bad mum, now she is at least 10 years younger than me whilst he is 4 years younger as he is nearly 30. I can't help but feel happy but sad at the same time she is in her early 20s and already has a child to another man, and by looks of things has pretty much set her future up as if he's trying to mess around while she's pregnant it won't last unless she's a crazy idiot for allowing it. now it isn't my business that but what is was he attempted to contact me few weeks ago which means she was pregnant at the time via a dating website, I just ignored him called him a loser and didn't know she was pregnant or I'd have given him what for! I was telling a man all about it and why I'm wary of men, unbeknown to me he was friends with my exes girlfriend, I didn't know her never met her or even knew her name! Coincidental perhaps? So I only found out he had baby yesterday.. he deleted her from Facebook and added me says what she done was terrible. Now I'm worried I've now broken up there family if it gets out he is on these sites ESP if she has just had a baby.. I know I should laugh my head off at the hell those 2 idiots put me through but I feel guilty, why didn't I keep my mouth shut, but my friends have told me I have nothing to be ashamed of and reminded me of the horrible things they put me through and at times I wanted to end my own life because of it.. I think in some way it's karma justice but I don't want to hurt anyone not like that anyway.. I'm confused I feel terrible-should I be?

Clarify I really didn't know this man was this girls friend, I'd only told him the story as he thought I was weird ing out on him, when I told him he asked for exes name to see if he himself knew my ex.. turns out it was the girlfriend he knew.. I know I shouldn't be ashamed I've done nothing wrong, but my ex will say oh she's crazy she was stalking us this is revenge, that's not my style ESP not to someone whose just had a baby.. I'm scared Of what I told her friend will now cause me a further headache,

 

What do I do?

[Gloria25]

Put your energies somewhere else and forget this guy and her...

 

I mean, even if they did you dirty, spending your time waiting for them to get a pie in their faces just makes you upset and postpones you from moving on to a happier self/life.

[Confusedsad81]

Think you missed part this been going on 2 years, and if I joined a dating site would that not mean I'm moving on?

 

how can you move on from anywhere when a man crops ups telling me I'm worthless and makes me feel like I'm dirty, like I'm nothing..how far else would you expect someone to move on when person tried and keeps getting tripped up? It's like a school bully who won't let you past but stand belittling you and pushing back..that is what it feels like so please spare me the moving on part when I've tried that already ok

Because it sure as hell isnt you that gets reminded of it all the time..

[Gloria25]

Think you missed part this been going on 2 years, and if I joined a dating site would that not mean I'm moving on?

 

how can you move on from anywhere when a man crops ups telling me I'm worthless and makes me feel like I'm dirty, like I'm nothing..how far else would you expect someone to move on when person tried and keeps getting tripped up? It's like a school bully who won't let you past but stand belittling you and pushing back..that is what it feels like so please spare me the moving on part when I've tried that already ok

Because it sure as hell isnt you that gets reminded of it all the time..

 

I'm not saying it's easy, but necessary.

 

Yes, you can't control others. I mean, you went onto a dating site and "poof" here it is in front of you again. BUT, you have control over yourself. Don't let it consume you. Yes, it's normal to get angry and feel certain things and trust me, 2 years is a lot, but look at what happened. You acted on your feelings in the moment (anger) and now you're here feeling bad and sucked back into the drama.

 

Just stand strong, look at this little situation as a set-back and keep on doing what you need to do to leave him and her in the dust.

 

You can start by "unfriending" him on social media...

[Confusedsad81]

Did that when he dumped me...also changed number as after year didn't kno why he still had it..so he new thing was the dating site..why should I leave it I'm single..and he doesn't use face pictures it's all blank now know reason why to that..

[autumnnight]

You can argue with people who try to help you....or you can take consistent steps to move on no matter what he/they do. You can only control yourself.

 

It's your choice.

[Confusedsad81]

I'm not arguing with anyone,

If you knew what those to had done to me, they even wanted 500 pounds from me to leave me alone, and telling me to move on? How do you move on from someone that sneaks up on you? am I not entitled to be hurt or angry?

My daughter was unwell mentally and tried to take her own life and those two jokers where callin me up calling me all sorts until I had to change my number..so not only dealing with my daughter who was on a bad place I was dealing with them as well, so after that getting life in order he messages me months later and bam all the bad stuff I tried to put behind me was back in front of me again. And you tell me to move on..how much of a failure of a parent am I that my own child the person I gave birth to tried to kill herself? Did I need reminding of that because that part of my life I will never get over..always watching for signs in case she does it again..so please do not patronise me

[sandylee1]

I'm not arguing with anyone,

If you knew what those to had done to me, they even wanted 500 pounds from me to leave me alone, and telling me to move on? How do you move on from someone that sneaks up on you? am I not entitled to be hurt or angry?

My daughter was unwell mentally and tried to take her own life and those two jokers where callin me up calling me all sorts until I had to change my number..so not only dealing with my daughter who was on a bad place I was dealing with them as well, so after that getting life in order he messages me months later and bam all the bad stuff I tried to put behind me was back in front of me again. And you tell me to move on..how much of a failure of a parent am I that my own child the person I gave birth to tried to kill herself? Did I need reminding of that because that part of my life I will never get over..always watching for signs in case she does it again..so please do not patronise me

 

You should have called the police on them at the time.

It's not your fault your daughter tried to commit suicide at all.

 

You can be hurt and angry - but how will that help you?

 

They are worthless human beings to do what they did and I really don't understand why you care about them for one second. I honestly wouldn't give a damn if they dropped dead.

 

Block him on FB and see him for the fool he is. Don't give him or her any headspace. Do you think you are in their thoughts.

 

Maybe counselling will help regarding your daughter's suicide attempt - I'm sure it was an extremely traumatic time for you. I know 2 people who committed suicide and it was devastating.

 

I hope your daughter is in a better place now.