Jump to content

When to disclose?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

My younger brother (aged 33) is dyslexic. He does not date at all because he is so self conscious about his dyslexia.

 

He's now smitten with a friend of mine he met at the weekend. He's asked me when --if at all -- he should disclose to a new potential girlfriend that he is dyslexic.

 

What are your thoughts on this? Is it something you'd mention in the first couple of dates? Or not mention at all? Or mention once you are in a serious, established relationship?

Posted

If a man I was dating told me he's dyslexic, I wouldn't really bat an eye. Honestly. I have taught many dyslexic adults who are fully-functioning members of society.

 

I think he wouldn't really need to mention it early on, as I don't see it being a dealbreaker that would send a woman running for the hills. If it comes up in the context of a conversation, he could talk about it and explain how it affects him and leave it at that. If he doesn't make a big deal of it, I don't imagine the woman would either, provided she knows what is is exactly.

  • Like 2
Posted

It depends on her......if they don't know east dyslexia is or other disabilities he could be looked at as the plague.

 

It's better to notify after something is established.

 

Another issue is how common does it affect him like with texting?

Posted

In my opinion, it's a fact that should be shared while sharing facts about eachother. I don't think he should go out of his way to mention it. I have an anxiety disorder, and I tell dates when we start sharing personal things about eachother.

Posted
In my opinion, it's a fact that should be shared while sharing facts about eachother. I don't think he should go out of his way to mention it. I have an anxiety disorder, and I tell dates when we start sharing personal things about eachother.

 

That's great that you feel you can do that.

  • Like 1
Posted

No offence but...who the hell cares? It's dyslexia, not I-Urge-To-Murder-People Syndrome.

 

It's not even worth mentioning at all. How does this determine what kind of man he is? Or how successful he will be with women?

 

You're talking about it like it's some deep dark secret that is extremely frowned upon. It's really no big deal at all. I personally couldn't give a rat's @$$ if my man had dyslexia and if he told me or not. There are bigger things to worry about.

  • Like 1
Posted

it's usually good to tell that sort of stuff pretty fast - learning disabilities, social disorders, mental disorders, anxieties, etc. - because the other person may not have an interest in being with someone who is affected by it. definitely not 1st date stuff, but within a few times of seeing one another it should come up.

Posted

It's okay not to mention it on a first date. After all, most first dates go nowhere. The second or third date would be a good time to mention it in conversation. There will be lots of different opportunities to drop it casually into the conversation--when making note of your parking spot number, a restaurant's address, etc.

Posted

I have a brain injury... Have you noticed?

 

It will come up eventually but this is not something he needs to worry about.

×
×
  • Create New...