Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 How do I calm down so that I don't do anything I might later regret (ie bone him)? The phone conversations etc have been very flirtatious, I think he's a lovely person and I also find him seriously attractive. We have both been quite excessive with the hours of phone conversations etc and we've both admitted we can't stop thinking about each other. Anyone got any tips to help me avoid doing anything too spontaneous when we meet up later?
empresario Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 How do I calm down so that I don't do anything I might later regret (ie bone him)? The phone conversations etc have been very flirtatious, I think he's a lovely person and I also find him seriously attractive. We have both been quite excessive with the hours of phone conversations etc and we've both admitted we can't stop thinking about each other. Anyone got any tips to help me avoid doing anything too spontaneous when we meet up later? This may sound crazy...but you do make your own choices and can do whatever you want. If you don't want to do anything, set boundaries for yourself and stick to them. No one can make that choice for you. 1
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 This may sound crazy...but you do make your own choices and can do whatever you want. If you don't want to do anything, set boundaries for yourself and stick to them. No one can make that choice for you. If I was doing what I genuinely want to do I'd be jumping into bed with him tonight without hesitation. But sex on the 2nd date is unlikely to be the best way to begin what hopefully may become a relationship. I've never had sex early on in a relationship before (typically not for at least 2 to 3 months into dating). But that's always been quite easy as although I've liked the guys I haven't felt in 'I just want to rip your clothes off' mode around any of them. This is different.
Toodaloo Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 I don't know how you calm down when you are crazy about a guy. Perhaps book up other stuff with your friends instead so you physically can't keep going on dates with him so often and you calm it down that way? 1
Zippy2000 Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 How do I calm down so that I don't do anything I might later regret (ie bone him)? The phone conversations etc have been very flirtatious, I think he's a lovely person and I also find him seriously attractive. We have both been quite excessive with the hours of phone conversations etc and we've both admitted we can't stop thinking about each other. Anyone got any tips to help me avoid doing anything too spontaneous when we meet up later? You want to bone him!? Aint that a mans term because they have a "bone". lol Anyway, Id just take a slight step back. When it burns bright and starts fast it will burn out fast and not last. Take your time and get to know him better. relationships take time. Whast the rush?
scooby-philly Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 It's good that you found someone you're crazy about. Look up the scene from Juno "good mood, bad mood....". Hopefully he'll feel the same way. It's even better that you understand yourself and know what you want in the short term and know it may not be compatible in the long term. Let him set the pace.... The worst mistake I've ever made in life was trying to let a relationship grow from a one night stand. It should have been good sex for a week or two or ongoing fwb....but she wasn't my type in terms of dreams, communication, lifestyle, expectations, etc. Honestly, even before that - I wouldn't have wanted to sleep with someone on the second date - even if I wanted to rip her clothes off. Not if I dug her and wanted to see what could happen long term. I wouldn't wait 2-3 months either. Somewhere between there is the magic spot for each of us in each situation. So take your time. To give you the advice you seek - don't let yourself go over his place or go over your place. If you're in the car & making out - don't jump in the back seat. If you seriously can't wait to bone him....a little foreplay for dates 2,3,4 will keep him wanting.. 1
d0nnivain Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 My tricks to slow myself down 1. wear ugly underwear that you would be embarrassed to let him see 2. don't shave your legs 3. do not go anywhere with private horizontal surfaces 6
Yummm Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 My tricks to slow myself down 1. wear ugly underwear that you would be embarrassed to let him see 2. don't shave your legs 3. do not go anywhere with private horizontal surfaces :laugh: Hilarious, I can see how this works Yeah, take it easy girl, if something is to come from this, you have all the time in the world. Easier said than done for sure, but take everybody's advice! Your gut is telling you to slow down so try your best to do it. 1
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 Although it's enjoyable I'm a bit shocked at how into him I am so quickly. Don't understand how I've made it to the age of 38 without ever feeling like this at all before
Toodaloo Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 Although it's enjoyable I'm a bit shocked at how into him I am so quickly. Don't understand how I've made it to the age of 38 without ever feeling like this at all before Damn girl you better grow a merkin quickly then... 1
Jejangles Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 My tricks to slow myself down 1. wear ugly underwear that you would be embarrassed to let him see 2. don't shave your legs 3. do not go anywhere with private horizontal surfaces Yes, to all of this. I go even further if I want to make sure I won't be doing anything and plan a date near home but don't tidy up, so I would be embarrassed for him to see my place. 1
Ruby Slippers Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 I agree with the advice to wear unsexy panties and not shave. You're very unlikely to reveal less than your best to Mr. Sexy.
Jules Dash Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 I would just have sex. I am currently trying out holding off like you usually do but I usually go for sex early but since you have never done this I say you should live a little for once and bone the hell out of him. I am serious. 1
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 Haha, it's very tempting. It wasn't even exactly lust at first sight. My very first feelings when I met him were "what an intelligent guy. He's so lovely to talk to and listen to." But this quickly turned into me also wanting to rip his clothes off. I guess I gotta go with the flow :laugh: I would just have sex. I am currently trying out holding off like you usually do but I usually go for sex early but since you have never done this I say you should live a little for once and bone the hell out of him. I am serious.
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 What's made you decide to hold off sex? I would just have sex. I am currently trying out holding off like you usually do but I usually go for sex early but since you have never done this I say you should live a little for once and bone the hell out of him. I am serious.
Jules Dash Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 What's made you decide to hold off sex? I just want to see how well things would go if the woman I am dating and I fully establish a relationship without focusing on sex. I had sex with my last girlfriend on our 2nd date and 3rd time meeting her and she became a little obsessed with our sex life and it became a huge, annoying headache. She was overly concerned about pleasing me sexually. I know that sounds wierd but I won't go into details to clarify this. It is kind of complex. I then looked back on many of my dates and relationships over the past 5 years and wondered if me trying to get women into bed ASAP was a problem with me establishing something really long term. It is not that I hold the early sex against them or anything because I am actually very turned on by the fact that they had sex with me so soon. I am just not sure if it is a roadblock to me developing a loving relationship for years because the focus becomes on sex too much too soon. With that said, I don't regret the early sex in my past and if you want to have sex with this guy early, I support it. It's ok to just want to screw the heck out of someone at times. 1
Recommended Posts