Karimikui Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 Why or why not? Has it happened to you? 1
d0nnivain Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 I absolutely believe in lust at first sight. Over the years I have also known that I have a "good picker." Including my husband, the last 3 guys I had serious LTRs with were men with whom I felt major sparks / chemistry when I 1st laid eyes on them. With the 1 who I dated for about 12 years & lived with for 10, when he shook my hand hello, based on my mother's promise that I would just know when I met The One, I felt a jolt go up my arm & I thought Wow! I just met my future husband. Given how dysfunctional our relationship was and how much garbage I put up with based upon what my mother said, I can only assume she was wrong. So love, not exactly. Totally lust which led to the potential & the experience of love. 3
mrldii Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 Like d0nnivain wrote, yes I do...with qualifiers. It most assuredly has always been "lust at first sight" which then grew into "love". So, yes, I vote "love at first sight...in retrospect". 1
stillafool Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 I've felt that "lust at first sight" also where the first time you see each other you can't take your eyes off them and vice versa, your heart starts beating as if it's going to jump out of your chest. It's mind blowing and it did turn into love.
SSM3 Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 In my opinion, and I am no expert, you need lust to form love. Without lust, love won't finally happen. Lust at first site, yes Love at first site, no.
Toodaloo Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 I believe any thing can happen. I also believe that just because it can doesn't mean that it will...
MissBee Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 Why or why not? Has it happened to you? Extreme connection, yes. In fact, it happened to me this summer. Met a guy, looked at him, shook his hand, electricity, we dated briefly before it fell apart. However, love? No. Love takes time and is not just an electric connection. Electric connections are often chemical and sexual in my experience or can be based on attractions for all kinds of reasons, even toxic ones, it can feel intense like love but time is what determines if it is love. 3
rocketman122 Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 whats this hand shaking crap. I always get and give a hug and kiss on the cheek. I never get a hand shake. thats too cold.
deadelvis Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 yes. met her once when I was 17 years old. dreamed about her for years, knew someday we would be together. 15 years later we went on our first date and fell head over heels in love. it happens. 1
shet Posted September 23, 2015 Posted September 23, 2015 No. Not even this "lust at first sight". So you saw someone hot and fancied them. That's not some kind of mystical magical chemistry, that's really mundane.
BriNyc82 Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 In my experience anytime I've experienced lust at first sight it ended just as fast. Maybe it was the adrenaline. Maybe we put each other on pedestals. I think there has to be some level of attraction in the beginning. But locking eyes across the room. Or knowing they are the one the instant you meet someone is BS 1
mystikmind2005 Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 It's simple really.... there will be a certain combination of looks, body language and vibe that work better for you than any other combinations you may encounter.
Trane Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 I believe in attraction at first site. Love is a spark that grows. At least for me it is.
purdyPeas Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 I used to believe in it when I had raging hormones in my 20's and 30's when my biological clock demanded that I find the ultimate DNA to breed with and create a superior human family of physical traits. Not anymore. I'm done with making babies and a family.
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 No. Not even this "lust at first sight". So you saw someone hot and fancied them. That's not some kind of mystical magical chemistry, that's really mundane. It's not as simple as that. The person you fall for in an instant is not even necessarily "hot". It's like instantly connecting in a big way with somebody as a friend, except that you also want to sleep with this person and the feeling is altogether more intense.
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 It's simple really.... there will be a certain combination of looks, body language and vibe that work better for you than any other combinations you may encounter. True, but you also have to like what they say and what they seem to be about as a person. 1
seekingluck Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 Yup. The last guy I dated was like that. It was one of those electricity things at first meet. He said it was my eyes. I met him, we shook hands. I ran into him later that day at a store, after we exchanged info. I was looking at some jewelry and he helped me try on a necklace. Never thought about how intimate that was till his stranger helped me put one on. The chemistry was like that the whole time. It fizzled out because we didn't have enough in common in terms of upbringing and life values to hold it together beyond the chemistry. He wanted what I couldn't give him.
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 How long did you date him? What was the sex like? Yup. The last guy I dated was like that. It was one of those electricity things at first meet. He said it was my eyes. I met him, we shook hands. I ran into him later that day at a store, after we exchanged info. I was looking at some jewelry and he helped me try on a necklace. Never thought about how intimate that was till his stranger helped me put one on. The chemistry was like that the whole time. It fizzled out because we didn't have enough in common in terms of upbringing and life values to hold it together beyond the chemistry. He wanted what I couldn't give him.
seekingluck Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 How long did you date him? What was the sex like? We gave it a try off and on for a year. The sex was generally exciting. He liked to try new stuff. That was the first relationship I had that was so sexual. I'm used to connecting more on the emotional/intellectual level. It was problematic because the more we tried, the harder he fell and the more I became distant. I was his ideal match, but he wasn't mine. 1
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 At least you tried. Good for you. Given that you two had such an electric start when you first met, did things calm down quite quickly or was it very passionate generally? Was the first kiss amazing? We gave it a try off and on for a year. The sex was generally exciting. He liked to try new stuff. That was the first relationship I had that was so sexual. I'm used to connecting more on the emotional/intellectual level. It was problematic because the more we tried, the harder he fell and the more I became distant. I was his ideal match, but he wasn't mine.
seekingluck Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 At least you tried. Good for you. Given that you two had such an electric start when you first met, did things calm down quite quickly or was it very passionate generally? Was the first kiss amazing? It never calmed down at all. All super passionate. And still would be today. Which is why this ex is not a friend... Generally he is a guy that dates his female friends, so there was no way to gets be friends. And I know it would be really easy to slip into old patterns, it was very hot and heavy. We had lots of fun together -- in and out of the bedroom. But he and I had very different PDA preferences, and it led to tension. I am G to PG. And he was PG-13 headed into R. He always wanted to make out in public. One of the many "lifestyle" differences that didn't work. 1
EricaH329 Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 I believe in being physically attracted to someone at first sight. And I also believe that people exude good/charming/flirty vibes that can also lure you in.
Author Karimikui Posted September 24, 2015 Author Posted September 24, 2015 I definitely believe in both. I agree with you. Have you experienced one of these, or both?
love1336x Posted September 24, 2015 Posted September 24, 2015 (edited) Why or why not? Has it happened to you? o.o; I've had this happened to me twice. I dunno if it was lust or love at first sight. I did end up sleeping with both people within a week of knowing them. My recent girlfriend however we have been friends for about eight years, but we never met each other. It was all text, phone, Skype kind of thing, but like the moment I saw her for the first time in real life. I felt the SPARK, FIRE WORKS, EVERYTHING. However, her being female, and me first time exploring my bisexuality it confused me and made me do stupid stuff, but for sure if she was a man I would have kissed her right then and there because of the spark I felt. My 2nd boyfriend I ever had, sorta same thing. Met through POF (dating site) and when we MET SPARK, FIRE WORKS, you name it. I felt it. Instant love. My girlfriend we been together for almost 8 months now. I still feel the sparkie. And I hope forever to have this spark with her. Edited September 24, 2015 by love1336x
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