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My friend got mad when I apolgized


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Posted

My relative R ecommended this site to me to get an objective opinion. I'm in a one sided friendship with my former teacher. We have been friends for some months and she has never reached out to me on her own. I feel like I'm the one making all the effort and have tried to walk away from the friendship. This has been the only time she has made any effort, when she is turning the tables around on me to pull me back in. This has happened three times and she has

Contacted me each time

Last time I unfriended her and she contacted me and told me her schedule. I them felt guilty and really need and clingy so I accepted her terms

Of friendship and apologized to her

We went to a museum the next week and I picked up the check for our lunch. She thanked me and I said it was the least I could do for how I had acted and I should have talked to her before unfriending Her. She then became visibly uncomfortable and said in a low voice with gnashed teeth

You need to stop apologizing

She said it really slow and then made a sound like she was irritated and shook her head but right after her voice went back to normal and she changed the subject

It really surprised me

Was I wrong for apologizing? I am a 21 yo female

Posted
She then became visibly uncomfortable and said in a low voice with gnashed teeth

You need to stop apologizing

She said it really slow and then made a sound like she was irritated and shook her head but right after her voice went back to normal and she changed the subject

 

...

 

That scared me. For real, that sounded creepy.

Posted
Was I wrong for apologizing?

 

Not necessarily, but you had already apologized for it once and your apology was clearly accepted since she agreed to a friendly outing with you after all that. There was no need to bring up that unpleasant topic again.

 

On a side note, it seems as though you unfriended her to get a reaction out of her, which was manipulative and kind of a ****ty move. Some friendships just are what they are - sometimes there's only one party who puts in the majority of effort and that's not necessarily a bad thing. So what if you're the only one initiating hangouts? She accepts your invitations so obviously there's some sort of friendship coming from her side. Take it for what it is. You can't force someone to be the kind of friend you want them to be.

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