thebutterflyeludesme Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 I made a mistake and gave in when he started emailing me again. I saw him yesterday and that just brought so many emotions back that I thought I had gotten over. I do love him but this is not good for me and I know I have to go NC. He's already blocked from everything but do I send him an email letting him know it's over or just go silent? What did you do and how did your MM react? Which way is better for me to move on as best as I can?
Summer Breeze Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 I said goodbye and never responded to a thing afterwards till he came back with the D almost final. I am the type to have closure and to physically say goodbye. But that's just me. He never stopped contacting me but it did fall off as the years went on. I would send him an email with the understanding that he will try and contact you. If you get tired of it threaten, and mean, to tell his W. It didn't bother me because I'd taken my control back. I actually pitied the both of them that the perception of a happy M was more important than a true one. But that was them living with their choices. There is no right or wrong way to initiate NC. You have to figure out what will work for you. You need to take the power back and not worry about what works for him - this is all about you. 1
d0nnivain Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 You just go silent there is no need to announce anything. He blocked you. You block him so you are not tempted. Delete him out of all your contacts too.
Grapesofwrath Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 I told him I was doing it, and then I did it. I had tried, unsuccessfully, in the past and would be persuaded by his pleas and tears to stay with him. this time my resolve was like iron. For my own peace of mind, and personal growth, I wanted to face the issue, though. I wanted to prove to myself that I was stronger than this and that I loved myself enough to say goodbye in a healthy way and mean it. I didn't yell. I didn't get into an argument with him. I just told him I couldn't do it anymore. Said what I needed to say and that was that. Every day I feel better and more like my true self. It is liberating, frankly. I didn't realize how much this affair was bringing me down until I ended it. I'm not out of the woods yet, but I sure feel a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.
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