loverage21 Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 I am a 21 year old male, never had a relationship. I see guys pick up girls with a flick of their fingers it seems, me on the other hand I have to sell my soul to get a girl to like me. I am not hideous. I am not deformed. I am not fat. Although I can say I grew up a sheltered life and I am socially awkward and socially immature in many ways. The farthest I have gone is sex. Once. But sex is not to be confused with love. I was not wanted after that weekend. It was a hookup and that is all that was to her despite me wanting more. I have been told by many women that I appear unapproachable and I can't figure it out. I was later told by 2 women it has to do with my facial structure, that it almost looks like I am angry when I am not. But it took until almost now for women to tell me that. Recently, I crushed hard on a girl and found out she liked someone else and he liked her back. It seems like no matter what I do, No matter how I approach things, I cannot find a decent woman to be attracted to me. If I went to other countries (right now I live in the USA), there are women who are grateful to even have an American man like her. I feel like I can have so much more potential than here in the USA. I feel women here set their expectations and standards almost to the point of being unmeetable.
central Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 It's not realistic. Learn to smile to counteract your supposedly intimidating facial structure. Make friends, join groups, work on your social skills - you'll always benefit from having those wherever you are. Besides, you can't just go overseas and stay. You'll eventually have to immigrate to that country, or if you find someone, arrange for them to immigrate to the US. It can be time consuming, complicated, and expensive. Don't forget language and cultural barriers. And those women looking for American men want someone with the ability to support them decently - at 21, are you capable? Can you trust that they wouldn't just marry you for the green card, and eventually leave, especially if you lack social skills?
Clarence_Boddicker Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 Nope, looking in other countries won't help you. There's something about you that is off. I doubt it's your face. Usually it's a person's; attitude, behavior or personality. The best way to undo the damage caused by living a sheltered life, is to start living a genuine unsheltered life. Have you done that? Are you living on your own, earning your own money?
kassy Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 Ok so you are 21 and no one loves you... Seriously you are a young pup, don't worry about it. Go have fun, explore things you like, do things hat make you laugh and smile. If you've lived a sheltered life maybe travel a bit or if you have finished university then try a job overseas even just an internship or something. If you go to the other side of the world to find someone to love you because you are American you are 99% sure to get swindled. I live in Asia. A lot of women here would jump at the chance to marry you and move to the U.S. (I am an expat but I have been here a long time and seen it all). But don't for a second confuse that with they will love you. They will sweet talk you and pamper you and tell you everything you want to hear to believe that they have never loved someone so much, if they manage to get you to marry them and you manage to go through the long and expensive visa process to get them to the U.S... Well then they only need you for a while, to get their family safely to the U.S. After that, forget that loving lady you met, she will either divorce you or have a complete personality change. It may sound cynical, but they are survivors and will do this, this is their best chance at a better life, until they have a better life they don't have the luxury of love. They will very rarely fall in love with you. This is not like some guy who is an expat here and meets a person through work or friends who doesn't "need" him and they fall in love. That happens all the time. But that isn't what you are going to get. Seriously forget the grass being greener overseas, it isn't if you want to be in a loving relationship. Stop the pity party and go out and have fun. You are 21 for goodness sakes!!!! Just stop the nonsense right now please
Author loverage21 Posted September 21, 2015 Author Posted September 21, 2015 It's not realistic. Learn to smile to counteract your supposedly intimidating facial structure. Make friends, join groups, work on your social skills - you'll always benefit from having those wherever you are. Besides, you can't just go overseas and stay. You'll eventually have to immigrate to that country, or if you find someone, arrange for them to immigrate to the US. It can be time consuming, complicated, and expensive. Don't forget language and cultural barriers. And those women looking for American men want someone with the ability to support them decently - at 21, are you capable? Can you trust that they wouldn't just marry you for the green card, and eventually leave, especially if you lack social skills? I have tried online dating. Words cannot express how much effort I put into okcupid narrowing down results even by question. It is hard to find women my type and the ones that are, you exchange a few words and they stop talking to you. Many of these girls are hypersensitive. You say one thing wrong and it is over. Social groups....I have attempted using meetup. The vast majority of the groups consist of people middle aged and older. I am having trouble finding college age people. And speaking of college, I am about to start but I am not in college right now. I have a few friends that I have asked to introduce me to women, but they claim they don't know of anyone. So where do I start?
Maggie4 Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 Where do you start? College. You are way too young to go down that path of dating foreign women. And imo too young to start dating online. 2
Els Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 Go. You'll quickly find out that there are bigger problems in life than those you have. And you might even pick up something useful during your travels.
d0nnivain Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 Learn to smile. If you are being told your face makes you look angry you are probably defensive & scared in social situations. Force yourself to smile. It probably is as simple as that. Don't leave the country. That's just silly & unrealistic.
Siquijor Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 Ok so you are 21 and no one loves you... Seriously you are a young pup, don't worry about it. Go have fun, explore things you like, do things hat make you laugh and smile. If you've lived a sheltered life maybe travel a bit or if you have finished university then try a job overseas even just an internship or something. If you go to the other side of the world to find someone to love you because you are American you are 99% sure to get swindled. I live in Asia. A lot of women here would jump at the chance to marry you and move to the U.S. (I am an expat but I have been here a long time and seen it all). But don't for a second confuse that with they will love you. They will sweet talk you and pamper you and tell you everything you want to hear to believe that they have never loved someone so much, if they manage to get you to marry them and you manage to go through the long and expensive visa process to get them to the U.S... Well then they only need you for a while, to get their family safely to the U.S. After that, forget that loving lady you met, she will either divorce you or have a complete personality change. It may sound cynical, but they are survivors and will do this, this is their best chance at a better life, until they have a better life they don't have the luxury of love. They will very rarely fall in love with you. This is not like some guy who is an expat here and meets a person through work or friends who doesn't "need" him and they fall in love. That happens all the time. But that isn't what you are going to get. Seriously forget the grass being greener overseas, it isn't if you want to be in a loving relationship. Stop the pity party and go out and have fun. You are 21 for goodness sakes!!!! Just stop the nonsense right now please It's not as high as 99%. I know plenty of guys who have brought foreign women over from Asia and have lived a happy married life. Usually these are shrewd guys who have had plenty of experience of the said country beforehand. I think that kind of figure applies to the first timers who find a woman off a dating site and fall in love with her five minutes after meeting her for the first time.
Arun1910 Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 wellll..... http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/722546/terminator-smile-o.gif Sorry
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