A Difficult Situation With My Ex Fiancee

[TheBurrato]

Hey I’m having a lot of problems with my ex fiancee of two years and maybe I could get some advice basically she was the one who left me and after about two weeks I rebounded and dated someone else, anyways my ex decided to message me again and she pretty much told me that she promised me she’d always come back to me and that she had never moved on and that it was my choice to move on. Any ways we started to talk again but it seemed like she was stepping on glass just to talk to me. One day I had got fed up with it and eventually ended up saying we can’t be “just friends” anymore I need to cut contact. She ended up saying how are we supposed to date again if we can’t be friends in the first place? She also told me that she really wanted to say sorry and she loved me and told me that she felt we were soul mates and soul mates would always find a way to get together. I also told her that it’d be too hard to see her move on to someone else and she responded like this to me Christian you’ll always be the one but I’d rather be alone than deal with the arguing I’m not going to move on to anyone else. So we kept talking and still it seemed like she was upset to talk to me and one day I had got desperate of her and she basically told me to MOVE ON GO DATE OTHER PEOPLE I DON’T CARE WANT YOU DO ANYMORE. So anyways I asked her right after why did you make all of those promises to me then of you not moving on saying we’re soul mates and that you promised to always come back? She replied with it’s not my fault you aren’t believing me. I told her when I said I wanted to be with you for all eternity I meant it you’re the only one who isn’t carrying out what they said and she replied with you’re the only one who keeps breaking that eternity by saying I’m going to end up moving on to someone else. We stopped talking for a few days and I had messaged her and asked if she was busy the day after and she told me that it’s no use to me to know if she’s busy or not tomorrow. So I’m not sure what to think about all of this she keeps our pictures on website and I actually have asked her to take them down before but she won’t take them down and I’ve asked her to give me the engagement ring back but she won’t and last I saw her she still wears it. Honestly I love her a lot and I want her back but I don’t know what to think of all of this am I over thinking things should I believe in hope for us getting back together? At times I feel like there’s no chance but she made those promises to me and seems to be adamant about them at least when I ask her.

[d0nnivain]

She wants her cake & to eat it too.

 

If you want to reconcile with her, tell her that. But also tell her she has to start dating you again right now, exclusively. . . and all that entails.

 

If after 2 years she can't do that you have to realize she doesn't know her own mind & all that crap she's spewing about soul mates & always loving you is BS. She's lying. She can't move on but she doesn't want you to either. She wants to be miserable.

 

If she had your best interests at heart, she would make a choice: together or apart & stick to it. Since you can't force her to pick together, if she picks apart, you need to make that permanent & severe all contact with her for all time. Your failure to do that will only hurt you because it will prevent you from moving forward.

[mightycpa]

Hey I’m having a lot of problems with my ex fiancee of two years and maybe I could get some advice basically she was the one who left me and after about two weeks I rebounded and dated someone else, anyways my ex decided to message me again and she pretty much told me that she promised me she’d always come back to me and that she had never moved on and that it was my choice to move on. Any ways we started to talk again but it seemed like she was stepping on glass just to talk to me. One day I had got fed up with it and eventually ended up saying we can’t be “just friends” anymore I need to cut contact. She ended up saying how are we supposed to date again if we can’t be friends in the first place? She also told me that she really wanted to say sorry and she loved me and told me that she felt we were soul mates and soul mates would always find a way to get together. I also told her that it’d be too hard to see her move on to someone else and she responded like this to me Christian you’ll always be the one but I’d rather be alone than deal with the arguing I’m not going to move on to anyone else. So we kept talking and still it seemed like she was upset to talk to me and one day I had got desperate of her and she basically told me to MOVE ON GO DATE OTHER PEOPLE I DON’T CARE WANT YOU DO ANYMORE. So anyways I asked her right after why did you make all of those promises to me then of you not moving on saying we’re soul mates and that you promised to always come back? She replied with it’s not my fault you aren’t believing me. I told her when I said I wanted to be with you for all eternity I meant it you’re the only one who isn’t carrying out what they said and she replied with you’re the only one who keeps breaking that eternity by saying I’m going to end up moving on to someone else. We stopped talking for a few days and I had messaged her and asked if she was busy the day after and she told me that it’s no use to me to know if she’s busy or not tomorrow. So I’m not sure what to think about all of this she keeps our pictures on website and I actually have asked her to take them down before but she won’t take them down and I’ve asked her to give me the engagement ring back but she won’t and last I saw her she still wears it. Honestly I love her a lot and I want her back but I don’t know what to think of all of this am I over thinking things should I believe in hope for us getting back together? At times I feel like there’s no chance but she made those promises to me and seems to be adamant about them at least when I ask her.

Holy ****! You'd better think twice about marrying somebody who's head is screwed on so crooked that this makes sense to them. Your life will be a series of ****ed up arguments that you can't win.

 

I doubt you want to live like that.

 

Tell her that as soul mates, you're very sure that you'll find your way back to each other. But in the meantime, you're moving on, and none of this friend ****.

 

Count your blessings.

Edited September 18, 2015 by mightycpa