Author MINDSHIFT Posted September 18, 2015 Author Posted September 18, 2015 (edited) I read up on your story. NC is not always the answer, but for you, it absolutely is. Since this breakup, you've: - Confronted the new guy at his home - Gotten yourself ARRESTED - Gotten your ex arrested based on lies - Logged into her FB account to check on her activity - Kept watch of how many times she's opened emails from you (wtf?!) I've done some undignified thing post-break, like checking on their social media, but the above is serious stuff that should've been a wake-up call that it was time to cut your losses and move away from all of this. Fair enough. Advice noted This just driving me crazy, im not in control. i guess i havent healed. it been 2 months since the breakup and i wished i used it to better my self. Edited September 18, 2015 by MINDSHIFT
Blanco Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 Fair enough. Advice noted This just driving me crazy, im not in control. i guess i havent healed. it been 2 months since the breakup and i wished i used it to better my self. You not being in control is precisely why you have to be NC with her right now. Nothing you say or do can benefit you right now. There will come a day when you probably will be OK to converse with her, but that is not right now. It sucks and it's difficult, but it's in your best interest.
Samuel_22 Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 Mindshift...You know me, and my story mate...and you remember how similar they are! I know you miss your ex and I know how complicated things can become at times, regarding our emotions...well it hurts our exes left us for their exes...can it be any worse? we did everything we could for these people, we sacrificed our lives, needs for their happiness, this is what we did, how did they respond in return? It is funny your ex started contacting you, mine did not dare do that...she sent her sister as a messenger...I did show them a finger, not the index nor the pinky...how did I do that? by not responding at all...why? because people here told me not to? NO... nobody can tell me what to do...nobody decides for my life...I do....but these people shared their wisdom with me and I can't thank them enough.... my question is why do you want to get back to her at all? Let's assume she is back right now... Can you trust her after what she did to you in the first place? she has not broken up with her ex and is texting you, are you sure when she is with you, she is not going to the same thing with others? Do you think she will stay with you this time? I talked to a lot of my female friends and they were all unanimous, that even if my ex came back she would not stay with me for long, it is just the matter of time...because if she had loved you, she would not have left you, and when she finds someone better again she will leave you, the best case scenario? she will settle with you... do you want this? Are you sure you will keep your baggage packed? you know you wont...somewhere during your relationship, you will unpack your baggage, and this will make the relationship more complicated than what it was in the first place? result? you will end up with another break up...with more resentment, and worse memories... I dunno man the final decision is yours...this is your life 2
Samuel_22 Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 You will heal faster if you correctly implement NC I suppose, C'mon Mindshift deep down you even know it, that it won't work with this girl anymore....whatever your decision is good luck bro... 1
Author MINDSHIFT Posted September 18, 2015 Author Posted September 18, 2015 Mindshift...You know me, and my story mate...and you remember how similar they are! I know you miss your ex and I know how complicated things can become at times, regarding our emotions...well it hurts our exes left us for their exes...can it be any worse? we did everything we could for these people, we sacrificed our lives, needs for their happiness, this is what we did, how did they respond in return? It is funny your ex started contacting you, mine did not dare do that...she sent her sister as a messenger...I did show them a finger, not the index nor the pinky...how did I do that? by not responding at all...why? because people here told me not to? NO... nobody can tell me what to do...nobody decides for my life...I do....but these people shared their wisdom with me and I can't thank them enough.... my question is why do you want to get back to her at all? Let's assume she is back right now... Can you trust her after what she did to you in the first place? she has not broken up with her ex and is texting you, are you sure when she is with you, she is not going to the same thing with others? Do you think she will stay with you this time? I talked to a lot of my female friends and they were all unanimous, that even if my ex came back she would not stay with me for long, it is just the matter of time...because if she had loved you, she would not have left you, and when she finds someone better again she will leave you, the best case scenario? she will settle with you... do you want this? Are you sure you will keep your baggage packed? you know you wont...somewhere during your relationship, you will unpack your baggage, and this will make the relationship more complicated than what it was in the first place? result? you will end up with another break up...with more resentment, and worse memories... I dunno man the final decision is yours...this is your life Thanks a lot bro. We are in similar situation so really respect your opinion. I ended up replying about 4 hours ago. After reading what u wrote I'm waking the **** up. I can tell she needs me more then I need her. She sounds lost n desperate. N ur right she still with the ex n writing me this ****. She can't be trusted. I'm going to implement no contact n forget about her n move on. I feel better today. I can find better I deserve better. 1
Mana15 Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 You have to remember how desperate you felt when you wrote those posts and how you don't ever want to feel that way again. If she wants to be in your life, she'll find her way into it. Meanwhile, stop thinking about it and focus on yourself. Unless you want to keep feeling down, that is. Find an happiness of your own! Learn to be happy again without someone to depend on!
NoLeafClover Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 When she asked if you thought her her...and she told you she missed sex...tell her you missed her booty
Marc878 Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 I'd do one last response. I've got friends. I moved on you need to do the same. Good luck. Then block everything
Samuel_22 Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 Thanks a lot bro. We are in similar situation so really respect your opinion. I ended up replying about 4 hours ago. After reading what u wrote I'm waking the **** up. I can tell she needs me more then I need her. She sounds lost n desperate. N ur right she still with the ex n writing me this ****. She can't be trusted. I'm going to implement no contact n forget about her n move on. I feel better today. I can find better I deserve better. That's the mindshift I know... We deserve better man, we do deserve better...
Seth0194 Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 Cavemen used to club their women into submission. You could try that if she's not responding properly to reason. Or, there's some spellcasters who are on the web that sell magic spells for you to get your woman back. I saw one with a money-back guarantee! How can you lose? NC gives you the control, if she responds to you, DELETE IT do not respond do not even look at it. Emails, send them to the trash bin. That is your control that is your power. To add further, move on and find someone else, make your life better then it was with someone else, More Control. You have control, you are just trying to pull a wagon with no wheels, push it and see how much easier it will be.
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