Leaa Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 My boyfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me last month. I was being controlling and insecure, and he went on vacation with his friends and I flipped out. He broke up with me. I do regret what I did. At the same time, his past always made me nervous. And even during our happy relationship he's lied to me about stupid things; like where he was, or saying his phone died cause he didn't wanna be bothered by me... and after that i kind of just lost it and had a hard time trusting him. The 2 years we spent together was 90% amazing. I never felt more comfortable with anyone in my life, we loved each other A LOT. He even gave me a promise ring, and wanted to propose to me within the year. With all of that being said, he broke up with me while he was away with his friends because he was tired of fighting, and me not letting him "have fun". When he broke up with me it was a rough couple of weeks. But around week 3, we started hanging out again (we have all of the same friends) and it was good. He started to kiss me in front of friends, bring me out to dinner, and stay over. Every time things would start to get better, i would mention getting back together and he would get mad and say he doesn't want that again. This past weekend we went to a party together, we haven't seen our friends in a while. He kissed me in front of them, said he loved me, etc. We had a lot of fun, and the next day he texted me in the morning "i love you" after weeks of refusing to text me first. Things were really really good. Then, one day, i asked him to hang out and he said no. I called him and he wouldn't answer. He said this was exactly what he didn't want, I gave him some space for a few days. Today, I texted him. He said he didn't want to talk anymore, I said ok can i see you later? He said he didn't want to see me anymore. I asked what was up and he just said everything always ends in a fight and he doesn't want that anymore. I tried to get him to talk but he got mad and blocked my number. I messaged him on Facebook and all he said was "leave me alone" I said forever? he said "no just leave me alone". I told him how upset and how confused I was and then he threatened to block me on Facebook. I'm so confused! Things were so good! I gave him space for a couple of says and it only made things worse! i'm so upset, and I don't know what to do
neowulf Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 i'm so upset, and I don't know what to do Yes you do. You know exactly what to do. It's just an extremely difficult and painful thing to have to do. I'm sorry for that. I know it hurts. Let him go. Stop calling him, stop messaging him. Just, stop. It's over. You chasing him isn't going to make him come back. For your own sake, let it go so you can move on with your life.
LostOnes05 Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 Yes you do. You know exactly what to do. It's just an extremely difficult and painful thing to have to do. I'm sorry for that. I know it hurts. Let him go. Stop calling him, stop messaging him. Just, stop. It's over. You chasing him isn't going to make him come back. For your own sake, let it go so you can move on with your life. This is absolutely correct. He is playing a game with you, knowing that you will be right there when he chooses to have you back. Don't fret over losing someone like that, they aren't worth your time. I'd be more upset about wasting my time on someone like that. The sooner you ignore him, the better off you'll be.
Omei Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 (edited) He wont get back together with you.... But because you'll let him and you have been hes fine with getting all the benefits that come in a relationship without having to commit to you so he will continue to do so until he finds someone he wants to date and then hell leave and you can beg and complain but you're not together hes just using you at this point for his needs and shoo's you away when he doesnt need you. I recommend not being that girl. Cut contact Edited September 18, 2015 by Omei
mystikmind2005 Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 My intuition for what it is worth, is telling me there is allot more to this than is obvious on the surface. I think he does love you and wants to be with you, but every time he tries, you are driving him away with your behavior, and i would guess much of it you might not even realize you are doing. I see allot of people in life who seem unable to recognize or acknowledge the full extent of their flaws, but please take my advice and take a good look at yourself, what do you have to lose?
Qboro90 Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 SOrry to hear what you're going through. You're best move is to separate from this guy completely and face the fact that its over…for good. Even if you think or hope theres a small chance of you getting back together down the line, you cannot hold onto that and live your life that way. its only going to hold you back. The reason he was hooking up with you and saying those things after the initial break up is because you were familiar and comfortable and available when you were out in a public setting or around friends. He didn't have to work at all and was able to hook up with a girl he knew likes him. Thats why he kept telling you he didn't want to get back together. He was having his cake and eating it too. Getting the physical perks when you were out together but not having the obligation to discuss anything emotional or definitive with you the following day. He will continue to do this by the way. Even if you leave him alone…3 months from now you might be at a party or out and he's there and hell start charming you saying "i miss you so much, you're so special and beautiful, i want you back" blah blah blah….Youll give in an hook up with him and be so excited because you think he's finally back. Then the next day or days hell be absent or flakey and you'll be wanting to know whats going on/how he feels/why he said those things, only to be set back to right where you are now. Avoid that at all costs. Don't let him pull you back and use you as an easy hookup/play toy anytime he wants. Move on with your life and start investing your time in other areas. This guy is done.
Heer Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 Hi, Leaa!! Unfortunately I'm kinda in the same boat as you are in right now. Although my bf and I aren't officially broken up we are curretnly on a break and I'm just sad all day:(:(. Stay in there dear and God bless:)
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