Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 I know this forum is riddled with a million pleas asking for help with this exact scenario, but I just had to post it. Why won’t he text me??? Ugh! 45 days straight of DAILY text messages, all initiated by him (usually in the morning). Had a date last night. Today? Crickets. Maybe I screwed up. I admit, I did make a few minor dating mistakes last night, but sheesh. I really thought it went well. Like, really well. This is exactly why I hate dating so much. It's torture.
Tobin Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 It's not texting's fault. Let's leave texting out of this, it's not fair that texting gets blamed for everything. If we keep at it like this, textings going to start getting a complex or something and texting doesn't deserve this. 1
Tobin Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 (edited) What dating mistakes do you think you made? It's a rather abrupt change in attitude. Edited September 17, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator deleted rude sentence ~6
jam.over.jelly Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Care to elaborate? What have you done that you thought might be the reason for his change of attitude?
GemmaUK Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 45 days straight of a guy texting me each morning would have put me right off. 1
sid3 Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 45 days of daily texting? Wow that's way too long. I think the answer is pretty clear, provided last nights date was the first time he met you in person. 2
jam.over.jelly Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 45 days of daily texting? Wow that's way too long. I think the answer is pretty clear, provided last nights date was the first time he met you in person. Now that would make sense. I actually assumed they have met before, but this is possible.
Gaeta Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Or should this title read 45 days and he still logs on the dating site!!
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 (edited) What dating mistakes do you think you made? It's a rather abrupt change in attitude. Well, for one, I chickened out when he walked me to my door, and I didn’t kiss him. That’s a definite dating fail, but later, I made sure to let him know I really wanted to. It’s been 45 days of communication, but we’ve only been on a few dates (we’re both kinda busy). First date, we kissed briefly. Second date, his friend was around, so no kiss. Then last night, I suddenly became a nervous weirdo. I thought maybe he liked me enough to see past that, though. I guess not. We went to a carnival for our date. I don’t know – maybe he didn’t have any fun? We rode rides for hours, ate greasy food, talked quite a bit, shared stories, laughed, held hands, embraced, blah blah. I thought it went well. Edited September 17, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator redacted rude comment from quote ~6
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 Or should this title read 45 days and he still logs on the dating site!! Ohhhhhh. Haha! Well, this a different dude! Haha! I had to let that other guy go.
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 45 days straight of a guy texting me each morning would have put me right off. Ha! I could see why that would put some people off, but I actually like the daily communication. It's sweet, and it's indicator (to me) of the guy's interest level.
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 45 days of daily texting? Wow that's way too long. I think the answer is pretty clear, provided last nights date was the first time he met you in person. This wasn't our first meeting. We've been on a few dates.
sid3 Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Oh, thanks for clarifying. Given the update I'd say there's still at least a thousand or so reasons why he hasn't texted you yet. 1
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 Oh, thanks for clarifying. Given the update I'd say there's still at least a thousand or so reasons why he hasn't texted you yet. Ugh. I'm giving up. I'm going to the pet store tonight so I can start my cat collection. 2
jam.over.jelly Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Well, for one, I chickened out when he walked me to my door, and I didn’t kiss him. That’s a definite dating fail, but later, I made sure to let him know I really wanted to. It’s been 45 days of communication, but we’ve only been on a few dates (we’re both kinda busy). First date, we kissed briefly. Second date, his friend was around, so no kiss. Then last night, I suddenly became a nervous weirdo. I thought maybe he liked me enough to see past that, though. I guess not. We went to a carnival for our date. I don’t know – maybe he didn’t have any fun? We rode rides for hours, ate greasy food, talked quite a bit, shared stories, laughed, held hands, embraced, blah blah. I thought it went well. Well, did he try to kiss you?
sid3 Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Ugh. I'm giving up. I'm going to the pet store tonight so I can start my cat collection. Nothing wrong with that, just don't start dressing them up and talking to them like they're people. That's when it gets creepy. Kidding aside, you said you chickened out, what did he do? 1
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 Well, did he try to kiss you? Okay, okay – here’s the truth. On our first date, he walked me to my door, gave me a long embrace and looked into my eyes. His beautiful face caused me to freak out. My anxiety got the best of me, and I ended up giggling like a weirdo. Honestly, it’s a miracle I didn’t pass out. I explained to him that I get nervous when it comes to the first kiss, and he seemed to understand. I did manage to kiss him briefly, but it was kinda awkward (all me, not him). That didn’t stop him from asking me out on more dates. So, no – he didn’t try to kiss me. I wouldn’t either after that. Haha! When I told him later not to mistake my awkwardness for disinterest, he said he didn’t try this time, because he didn’t want to make me uncomfortable. He said we could work on it “next time.” But, come on. I think it’s becoming pretty clear that there isn’t going to be a “next time.”
jam.over.jelly Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Whoa, I honestly don't know what to say. Maybe after the first date, he was willing to give it another chance because he liked you enough to see you again, second date was with his friends so it didn't really count. Third date was when you two interacted solely with each other, but yet another awkward/nervous kiss from you? Maybe he now has made up his mind that all he can be with you is friends, and maybe he didn't feel a romantic connection after all. It is hard to tell if you don't share a kiss after 3 dates already. 1
fitnessfan365 Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 all initiated by him (usually in the morning). . This might be your answer. I think we all have a point where we get fed up, if a woman is NEVER initiating at all. Eventually we get bored having to do all the work. Looks like after 45 days straight of you never initiating he finally got fed up. Or he could just be busy..LOL 1
jam.over.jelly Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 However, if i were you, i'd text him and let him know you had a great time, and suggest hanging out again soon if he would like, there's nothing to lose here.
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 Whoa, I honestly don't know what to say. Maybe after the first date, he was willing to give it another chance because he liked you enough to see you again, second date was with his friends so it didn't really count. Third date was when you two interacted solely with each other, but yet another awkward/nervous kiss from you? Maybe he now has made up his mind that all he can be with you is friends, and maybe he didn't feel a romantic connection after all. It is hard to tell if you don't share a kiss after 3 dates already. That's what I'm afraid of. Nothing says "lacking confidence" more than a girl who turns into a nervous pile of goo when a guy tries to kiss her. I can completely understand why that's a turnoff. It just... sucks. I liked him, and like every other relationship I've had, I screwed it up. Just sucks.
Author Lovelorn00 Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 This might be your answer. I think we all have a point where we get fed up, if a woman is NEVER initiating at all. Eventually we get bored having to do all the work. Looks like after 45 days straight of you never initiating he finally got fed up. Or he could just be busy..LOL Yes, I've considered this as well. I guess I just never initiated out of fear of breaking "the rules." I've always heard that woman should NEVER initiate communication. Ever. Maybe I should just text him first finally?
sid3 Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Yeah, I say step out of your comfort zone and text him. Go for it! 1
jam.over.jelly Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 That's what I'm afraid of. Nothing says "lacking confidence" more than a girl who turns into a nervous pile of goo when a guy tries to kiss her. I can completely understand why that's a turnoff. It just... sucks. I liked him, and like every other relationship I've had, I screwed it up. Just sucks. Don't beat yourself up. Like I said, text him! Ask him out! He's been initiating the whole time. Been 3 dates, it is now your turn to suggest doing something. But if he doesn't respond, don't text him again, and it's time to move on. You never know, he might be waiting for you to text him. This has happened to me recently, if I didn't ask my guy out, there would have been no 4th date last weekend. But I asked him out, and he said yes, and 5th date coming up he asked me. So we take turns now. Go ahead and ask him girl! 1
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