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It feels like he is haunting me.

tarabear11

By tarabear11
in Coping

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tarabear11 New Member

tarabear11

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I had a very intense and short lived 2 month relationshipwith a guy who to be perfectly blunt, was a bit of a jerk. I broke it off with him 2 months ago but I still have very strong feelings for him, infact I think my feelings verge on obsession, he is all I seem to think about.

 

I have gone totally no contact with him for 1 month (no phone calls, textmessages, no social media, nothing). However as much as I try to force him outof my mind he still keeps showing up. Itried to join tinder last week and he showed up on my card list, the weekbefore I saw him out in public (I left ASAP) and this week I was looking in thelocal newspaper and I saw a photo of him and his friends. It’s starting toreally get to me because every time I encounter him I feel this immense griefabout this relationship and a longing for being with him again. The fact thathe showed up on tinder makes me really scared that I will see him with another woman.

 

He is so good looking and he looks so happy and unaffected by the ending of our relationship, however Iam struggling a lot. Unfortunately I don’thave the extensive social life that he does, so it is hard for me to escapethis other than with work and the two close friends.

 

As much as I dislike the person he is, I just can’t get him out of my mind andI am really concerned that I will never be able to get over him because withtime my obsession seems to heighten rather than diminish.

How can I overcome an obsession with one’s ex? Also, how can I learn to copewith seeing him out in public again without turning into an absolute mess? itjust seems so inevitable that it will happen again, especially since I live ina smallish town.

Edited by tarabear11
15Love Established Member

15Love

Posted
Posted

See a therapist if you need to. If you don't get a handle on obsessing about someone who didn't even treat you well...there might be something going on, inside you. Please know, I'm speaking with 15 years experience. It's not pretty. I never got the help I needed. Now I wonder if I ever will.

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